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Close to relapse... Help!

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Testify, Sep 22, 2021.

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  1. Testify

    Testify Fapstronaut

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    Hi,
    i think i'm on 379 days without masturbation but i feel so horny that tonight i almost had sex with a sofa.
    I even watched/not watched a porn in my bathroom, sitting on the wc, while doing morning poo: so sad and ugly scene...
    For some reasons i want to reach at least 510 days without masturbating...
    But i'm soooooooo horny!

    Help.
     
  2. lampt7392

    lampt7392 Fapstronaut

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    Trying posting and reading posts here or related forum to distract yourself, it also remind you what your goal is. Sometimes when my urge appears, I read this forum immediately for like several seconds to mins until I get my mind back. Stay strong tgt!
     
    D'AverageJoe and Testify like this.
  3. DeeJ4y

    DeeJ4y Fapstronaut

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    Are you still watching porn? Since you said only so and so days without masturbation and nothing about porn. I figure you have had these urges during your streak before, you can and should just try your best to ignore them and find something to occupy yourself.
     
  4. Testify

    Testify Fapstronaut

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    Hi, not watched porn and not masturbating for more than one year, but since i have these horny days, sometimes i watch porn, for some minutes, but i do not masturbate. i'm also having difficult days, this might be why i'm having these urges...
     
  5. Megatherium

    Megatherium Fapstronaut

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    The thing is the bigger problem is porn, not masturbation. Masturbation can be healthy, porn is not. I've never been on such a long streak but I imagine you must have some other hobbies or some way to express these emotions. It is not healthy to go crazy and watch porn and masturbate, but it is also unhealthy to repress your emotions for so long. I do not know you, but I believe you can find a way to solve your current problem without creating a new one. Good luck brother
     
    D'AverageJoe, Testify and lampt7392 like this.
  6. DeeJ4y

    DeeJ4y Fapstronaut

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    BRUH. you said in the same sentence "I have not watched porn in a year and still sometimes watch porn". Which one is true? It does not matter if you masturbate or not. Watching porn is watching porn. I'd say that is the main reason for the urges. We all have bad days but I would recommend not watching porn to deal with them, is this not the real reason to do nofap in the first place? I wish all the best for you.
     
  7. Idf1998

    Idf1998 Fapstronaut

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    Block it from your device!!! Think about your progress man , and how you changed since than
     
  8. Megatherium

    Megatherium Fapstronaut

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    I think it's getting lost in translation. Many non-European English-speaking countries use different grammar, which I think is what's happening here. I think he meant to say he hasn't done both at the same time in over a year
     
    Testify likes this.
  9. Testify

    Testify Fapstronaut

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    my english is not perfect. i'll try to express myself better. I haven't watched porn for more than a year but for a few days now, due to the bad times I have, I've been watching them in the morning for a few minutes.
     
  10. Testify

    Testify Fapstronaut

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    yep :)
     
  11. Testify

    Testify Fapstronaut

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    i do have problems indeed, problems at home. i also wrote about these problems somewhere else on this forum. sometimes these problems flare up, show up again, and again... sometimes i think i should seek for help through social workers but... i also think is not a good idea in this historical period (my opinion).
     
  12. DeeJ4y

    DeeJ4y Fapstronaut

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    So you are watching porn. Stop it, maybe the urges will go away. It is not too late to stop watching now because sooner than later you are going to relapse for good. Remember it is never too late to stop watching it.
     
  13. DeeJ4y

    DeeJ4y Fapstronaut

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    I am sad to hear about your problems. Still watching porn will never make them go away. You are just adding fuel to the fire of feeling bad. If you want to talk about stuff you can, I will listen and try to help if you want.
     
  14. Testify

    Testify Fapstronaut

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    really? you mean in a private chat on this forum?
     
  15. Watching porn will definitely increase your urges. If you don't want those urges, then you definitely don't want the porn! The urges may not come as strongly on the same day as you ogled the porn--they may kick in with extra force about a day or two later. If you are in tune with your rhythms, you'll soon realize this.

    The tips linked in my signature may prove helpful to you as you consider the relationship between the porn and the urges.
     
  16. DeeJ4y

    DeeJ4y Fapstronaut

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    Yes, you can private message me!
     
  17. mentorr

    mentorr Fapstronaut

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    I think it’s been said by the rest of the forum already but Porn is directly creating your urges. But more importantly it sounds like you are using porn to self-medicate when you are stressed.

    I took a technical course once that was extremely difficult and most of all stressful. The course stressed me out so much that I quit it on the spot and went on a mini-P binge. No masturbation just raw scrolling looking scantily clad girls. This was my way of self-medicating when stressed. The result was I stepped into a longggg flatline the next day.

    Get the help you need and get those life issues resolved whether it be professionally or not. As far as your brain is concerned you will continue to turn to porn until you starve/change your P habit.
     
    Dexter Moran likes this.
  18. Mentorr,

    I recognise much of my own struggles in your post. Indeed until we rewire our minds relapse is likely to occur!
     
  19. mentorr

    mentorr Fapstronaut

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    I think this is exactly it. We often talk about rewiring but never talk about unwiring.

    We unwire by abstaining from PMO, we rewire by replacing our PMO habit with a more healthy and beneficial habit. If we fail to replace our old habit with a new healthy habit we leave the door open for a) a new unhealthy habit (or addiction) to be picked up or b) for our PMO habit to return once we fail to fill the void.

    I am currently suffering from making this mistake. After abstaining from PMO for 6-7 months and dissolving my addiction we entered into the pandemic, experienced lockdown, and I picked up an internet addiction. In short it resulted in cross addiction where you replace one addiction for another.

    I think it’s just important to remember that unwiring works from the top down, and rewiring works from the bottom up!
     
  20. Testify

    Testify Fapstronaut

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    that's it, self medicating my stress through random porn-watching.
     

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