College grades and disappointment

As a guy that has noticed the differences in grades with PMO'ing and not PMO'ing, I would say that not doing it will help your memory and focus and keep you more balanced out mentally. In my personal opinion it is not bad to blame yourself or feel upset about relapsing. If you never got upset or felt guilty about it you would never really find that spark to start up the engine again and keep it out of your life. Feeling low like that is a good thing and it keeps you from feeling complacent with a life of porn addiction. Instead of trying to "fix" the feeling, try embracing it and diving deeper into why you feel that way and how this feeling is going to help you. With that said, you mentioned "the feeling of guilt has overpowered me" , I would say that those feelings should never overwhelm you, you're higher self is not inherently a failure. In order to keep those feelings and emotions in check, you need to be aware of them and forgive yourself. Forgiving yourself starts with self love and you need to realize that bearing those feelings at such levels is not beneficial to you and will not lead to happiness. When you love yourself you want to succeed and to be happy. I'd say reflect on yourself. Gain self love. Gain awareness. Forgive yourself. Move Forward because everything is in front of you and you have to reach out for it.