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Commit suicide before becoming an incel?

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by thefuniindian, Oct 15, 2021.

  1. thefuniindian

    thefuniindian Fapstronaut

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    I'll be straight, I feel like im a failure, but Ive always prided myself for not being a sick fuck known as an incel. But after researching either my addiction or maybe my inherent fetish of trans/sissy porn, I've came to realize that sissy porn is another form of AGP, and that usually people who are into AGP are incels since, from my understanding, people who are desperate for an intimate relationship with a girl and is unsuccessful will be into crossdressing n shit in order to fulfill that need. Now Ive actually asked a girl out and I got rejected, I honestly don't feel bad about that experience and I don't think my life is ruined/that moment defines me. And I always acted/joked that love doesn't exist with my friends. But honestly I want an intimate relationship but I feel like a hypocrite to my friends for espousing cynical shit about relationships in the first place. And now after reading about AGP and incels, I fear that, like escalating to more dark forms of porn, I might escalate and lose my insanity and become another violent incel. Add in the fact that I never did well in my highschool and I promised both myself and my parents that Ill be different and improve in college(spoiler,I never changed and I think I regressed backwards into worse habits) and my dream of eventually joining the military. All of these things are unfulfilled. Mix in some health issues regarding cholesterol even though Im only 18 and the fact I have asthma, Ive come to the point where I realize I'm too weak and incompetent to even try to embark on these dreams. I feel like the effort is not worth the reward, and the cherry on top of this shitcake is that Im a massive pussy and not a man enough to commit suicide, before I become an incel, before I disappoint myself and others again. Maybe I just need to be more creative with my insults and Ill actually do it instead of pussy out.
     
    fusion47 and Nan0nymous like this.
  2. Nan0nymous

    Nan0nymous Fapstronaut

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    If you're not able to find love despite trying, you are an incel.
    Being an incel is not about shooting around high schools, that's just retarded.
    Don't know why would you want to commit sudoku, there's more to life than love.
    You can do a lot to improve, you might not get love but it'll make your life so much better.
    It's tough but be ready cause it'll probably get even worse with time
     
    thefuniindian likes this.
  3. thefuniindian

    thefuniindian Fapstronaut

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    I know that being an incel alone isn't gonna make me commit sleep away4eva. It's more of the final straw that breaks the camel's back. It just feels like my life is already shit and the fact that I'm very out of shape and I feel like I'm too dumb and incompetent to make significant changes to my life. I get it that with time life is gonna get worse, and if Im already being a pussy and not being able to change for the better in the first place, what's the point of continuing to exist. In a nutshell, I know I haven't hit rock bottom yet, so what's wrong with ending it all before it even comes to that point since my downward trajectory is set in stone.
     
  4. E31

    E31 Fapstronaut

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    Wtf. Get a hold of your self man, incel is a made up term not a terminal diagnosis ;)
    You are already in the right place so just go forward!
    All the love, all the power
     
  5. thefuniindian

    thefuniindian Fapstronaut

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    ah ok. Not sure if the right path is relapsing you Porn(since I’ve did that before writing this thread) or not commuting suicide. It’s just that one of my friends asked my highschool history teacher(who at the time I had a lot of respect and looked up to) if I was an incel. Mans straight up said yes and like I’ve been Lowkey struggling if he was serious or not and if I(at the time) would become another edgy school shooter. And I’ve also read up on some articles that watching porn since age 9 means your porn addiction never truly goes away and your more likely to relapse to your fetish/porn. Is it possible to at least descalate the porn since I started watching lesbian porn since I was 9, never watched vanilla at all. Or if it is even possible to eliminate Delayed ejaculation since I get fairly hard but I cannot cum, and I lose my erection almost immediately if I stop jacking it.
     
  6. E31

    E31 Fapstronaut

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    Okay I see, seems like you sadly got a whole lot of nonsensical information.
    Your teacher has either no idea what the word even means, which would make sense(I didn't even know what that was till last year and I'm not that old), or just a total dickhead, or your friend was bullshitting you. Either way it is nothing you would have to indentify with, get that word out of your system.
    That article is also bullshit, everyone is different and none can make a scientifically valid statement that if you done this with x years, youll always be addicted.
    Your brain is still in full plasticity mode and now is the best time to kick the habit and form new and healthy pathways, and that can be done a 100%!
    There might be always this little part that has been wired to using but you can leave that behind. I was addicted to loads of stuff, and I started fairly young. Porn and hypno stuff especially in combination with drugs among other things like smoking and alcohol, and over time I kicked it all.
    (I highly recommend this guys podcasts , since they're full of usable information on the brain: )

    Commit fully to this nofap reboot, do it now, fail as many times as you have to at it you will learn and grow from that, you have time my friend.
    Just be sure to not give up and in the end you'll have gained lots of wisdom on how to live a good life.

    And if you ever feel like you need to break the camels back, then destroy your computer, that is your problem, not you but all that external information.

    Stay strong, its worth it!:emoji_fist:
     
  7. look . I am turning 24 this december. I have never touched a girl due to the fear that its a big sin but I was heavily addicted to porn 3 years ago now this november my 3 years of nofap will complete Inshallah . Look if you havent had sex its okey .why? because the only meaningful relationship you are ever going to have is with your wife because she is going to be the mother of your children . then why not wait for it and focus on your life and forget about the girls till you have a plan to marry . and trust me when you are a well off and upstand citizen and earning well trust me because I am not lying these girls even of you dont know how to utter a single word to flirt them ,these girls will still try to be in relationship with you and even marry you .it doesnt depend on your skill to flirt . it depends on their willingness to let you into their life . and here where I live women stay home and dont come out and wear hijabs and burqas and men work hard and some marry early as 18 and some marry later as in 34 but still it doenst matter to people . it depends on the financial ability of a person to marry . still marry or date or swing . the women will always measure your abilities as a man ,your character and financial status on top . so dont stress yourself . you are too young and you have your whole life ahead . you can still achieve many things
     
    HitB likes this.
  8. DeeJ4y

    DeeJ4y Fapstronaut

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    Being incel is blaming women and hating them for not getting laid. Not getting laid even though wanting to is just life. I believe everyone will eventually find someone if they believe in it and work on theirselves to be a better person in many ways.
     
  9. Assume your self assessment is correct and the you are a weak willed piece of shit. That isn't all that you are. At the very least you had the wherewithal to make this post. You aren't inherently good and you aren't inherently bad. You are getting the results of your actions past and present and that's it. Your options are limited in the here and now but some of them are better than others. The number one thing you can do to start turning things around is to get religious about the gym. Workout classes, yoga classes, lifting on your own, eating right. Whatever else you do (school, work, video games, porn, etc..) get serious about building strength and do it for the right reason. That women like strong men pales in comparison to how you will feel about yourself as you start exerting effort. You will also start learning how to better interact with other people. Over time the porn will become less interesting.

    PM me if you want to chat.
     
  10. Yeah I mean leave this incel, alpha beta, hip hop shit out of your thoughts. If you fail in school and or collenge the reason is that it is not easy. I wasn't good in school myself and you have to learn about yourself to see how you like to learn. School in a way is very shallow and if you don't perform well, doesn't mean that you are an idiot.

    What helped me in the last couple of months is the thought that everything matters. Life is just a mass of little things and everything matters. When do you go to bed? Do you watch a lot of useless YouTube shit? Do you smoke? Drink a lot? What do you eat? Every meal you eat matters and is important. Prepare each meal with healthy attitudes in mind. Go to bed, go work out. Don't try to compete with fucking chads on instagramm but try to beat yourself. Be better then you were yesterday. Do that for some time and you will start to feel great about yourself.
     
  11. Agent

    Agent Fapstronaut

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    Who made you think that way first of all? You're being very cruel with yourself, that maybe reflects how people have treated you in the past, i speak from experience and i know its hard, having dreams getting crushed in front of you and seeing no light in the end of the tunnel but i can promise you it is worth keep trying and not to give up.

    Feeling like shit's all messed up is totally normal and sometimes its actually what happens, but your pain won't last forever and i'm sure if you wish you'll get somewhere. Keep the faith bro.
     
    virtuscb likes this.
  12. Okay, it's in Wikipedia lol. An internet subculture? I don't have to read further to know it's probably a buch of shit. As Agent says I think you are very cruel to yourself. Watch out what kind of idiot ideas or opinions you let in to your mind, you will start believing them after a while...
     
  13. I'm 37 and i can tell you mate that when i was 18 i didn't have stuff worked out and had a whole lot to learn about the world and myself so don't be too quick to condemn yourself. It's very unhealthy to keep thinking negative thoughts about yourself and often when we get stuck in this cycle we start to come up with unrealistic expectations and blow things out of proportion.

    my advice would be to forget this whole 'incel' nonsense. nobody is truly 'involuntarily celebate' who is able bodied and of reasonable IQ you just have to look around you at the real world and see how many different types of people are with each other. The focus with these so called 'incels' appears to be all about sex and they are absolutely obsessed by it, they feel that somehow if they have sex all their problems will disappear. Wrong, sex isn't all it's cracked up to be and you will still be the same person whether you had it or not. The problem is the view you have about yourself ie: your self esteem and confidence. No amount of sex (or porn for that matter) will make you more confident or improve your self esteem. We improve these things by finding our place in the world and adding value to it, by having a purpose, helping others, contributing to society.

    People are generally attracted to others who provide them with a sense of comfort, enjoyment, make them feel good etc and so it is important to learn to love yourself and be kind to yourself before you can expect anyone else to.

    You are only young so you have the advantage of time on your side, take this opportunity to try and find out why you feel so unhappy and maybe talk to someone about it who wont judge you. you can still achieve things in life by making small realistic goals.

    good luck with your journey
     
    Buddhabro2.0 and HitB like this.
  14. thefuniindian

    thefuniindian Fapstronaut

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    I guess I am somewhat young, just that all my former friends from highschool are able to go out to parties and hang out with girls while Im stuck at home watching porn. Stuff like these makes me feel like Im missing out on stuff that everyone else is able to experience which really sucks.
     
  15. thefuniindian

    thefuniindian Fapstronaut

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    I watched the entire podcast, some parts of it made sense, like balancing pain vs pleasure. Or how breaking an addiction is always gonna be long and ardous, and its normal for people to relapse. Its just that they mentioned that for some it's hopeless and they may break an addiction only for them to catch another addiction which eventually kills them, i.e a female alcoholic stops becoming one, only to be addicted to drinking copious amounts of water and she eventually dies from water intoxication. I'm not sure if Ill ever become trapped completely by my addictions and eventually fuck myself over completely, but its just food for thought I guess.
     
    E31 likes this.
  16. thefuniindian

    thefuniindian Fapstronaut

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    Yeah but doesn't watching a lot of porn sorta objectify women, I may not hate women but my porn may influence my train of thought, moral values, and behavior towards women in a negative way. And that's what really makes me feel disgusted about myself and makes me want to off myself before it ever comes to that point
     
  17. thefuniindian

    thefuniindian Fapstronaut

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    Yeah I guess your right about how working out makes you feel healthier, both physically and mentally, and also Id be down to Pm you, what times you free in your schedule to talk?
     
    Buddhism Is True likes this.
  18. thefuniindian

    thefuniindian Fapstronaut

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    I guess, I used to try and work on all the small stuff like clean my room, do the laundry, and clean up the yard. However I know that Im gonna relapse again and this stuff wont matter since I did this multiple times yknow? Its like that feeling of why are you doing this when you know in the future its not gonna matter due to one bad day of relapsing. But your right in the sense that you need the change your life in small easy steps. Like that confucious saying "Best time to plant a tree was 10 years ago, next best time is now." or something like that.
     
  19. thefuniindian

    thefuniindian Fapstronaut

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    I know bro but sometimes I can't keep up with the grind of life. I promised both my parents and myself that Id do better in college, but I broke that promise, and that's whats kinda fuckin me up, like 1; if I'm not a man of my word and not able to improve, whats the point of continuing. And 2; life is only gonna get harder from here so if I cant keep my shit together now, how am I gonna be able to get past the future, yknow?
     
  20. thefuniindian

    thefuniindian Fapstronaut

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    Yeah I know, but I feel very hypocritical everytime I make a mistake, and I dislike hypocrites, hence why I dislke myself. Feel like I can't let myself off the hook, but I do it anyways which makes me even more pissed at myself.
     

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