Committed AP Group With Leaderboard

Discussion in 'Accountability Partners' started by Halibut, Apr 15, 2019.

  1. Pashka

    Pashka Fapstronaut

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    Resetting the counter today. Looked at porn earlier, but closed it before I did anything. Even though I'm glad I didn't masturbate to it, it still left me feeling yucky. I am meeting a friend at the gym this afternoon, working out always resets my mood.
     
  2. Jerky

    Jerky Fapstronaut

    August 3, 2019

    Checking in
     
  3. jk243

    jk243 Fapstronaut

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    Day 0
    Relapsed all this week
    I feel powerless and distracted
     
    Pashka likes this.
  4. Halibut

    Halibut Fapstronaut
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    Hey guys, sorry I have been away for a while.

    Things have been going on - breaking from girlfriend has left me a bit of an emotional rollercoaster.

    I haven't been focused and as a result I have relapsed. It sucks but after going so long I feel better able to deal with the withdrawal symptoms - I feel a stronger character.

    I need to draw a line in the sand and keep going

    All the best ap's!
     
    Pashka and Legit1 like this.
  5. Jerky

    Jerky Fapstronaut

    August 4, 2019

    Checking in
     
  6. Legit1

    Legit1 Fapstronaut

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    Sorry to hear that, bro. Keep your head up and keep on pushing.

    I'm well aware that you have a bunch of tricks up your sleeve to avoid relapses, but sometimes things get too heavy and the best of us end up relapsing. I myself have been feeling unbalanced and uncomfortable with holding all of this sexual pressure in but I'm going to let it drive me. How can I manage that? Well, I've been having mood swings there and there, and instead of doing nothing and ride them out with time, I'm getting active. I feel rage kinda often and instead of taking the easy way out, might as well use that excess energy to be productive and improve myself. Stay strong out there, bro.
     
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  7. Jerky

    Jerky Fapstronaut

    August 5, 2019

    Checking in
     
  8. freedomispossible

    freedomispossible Fapstronaut

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    Day 1. I recently broke my streak which was for like 16 days because i was so isolated for hours in my house and the urges was too much. There was nothing i could do.
     
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  9. Legit1

    Legit1 Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys... I'm resetting the streak, I feel like I seriously have to. So the last 4 days have been getting tough and tougher... I wanted to relapse very badly today when I watched porn, I didn't edged or anything but I was getting close to start it, but I immediately came to my senses and came here to admit what I've done. I feel good that I didn't physically edged or relapsed but it was enough to make feel grossed out and reset my streak because I feel like taking this tougher road must be consistent until the end.

    I honestly just want a life that doesn't revolve around that filth, I feel like a loser knowing that I must use that in order to feel good. And the thing is I don't feel good if I use that, it's just a deceitful action that looks good but can really cripple a guy.

    Edit: My withdrawals that are kicking me down is that these urges are making me crave relapses and porn. I don't know if these urges are like a type of energy that I'm just not used to but they aren't fun, instead they manifest to rage, difficulty to enjoy anything, and irritability. I've been keeping myself active throughout this streak, but it's like these withdrawals keep on piercing through no matter what.
     
    Last edited: Aug 5, 2019
  10. pourover24

    pourover24 Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys, I also need to reset my counter. Man, I have a lot of thoughts - but not a lot of time to share them. I looked at porn and edged today. Disappointed - but am sick of it already and just want to be back on the right path again.

    @Legit1: I too have really struggled lately with urges to relapse - strong urges that I don't know how to escape from - especially when I'm tied (figuratively) to my computer needing to get work done - with no other option but to either press on or find a distraction. So, that has been super tough for me. Sounds like you've been doing well though man - keep it up!
     
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  11. Legit1

    Legit1 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for that. Today was a 17 day streak ruined, not in the worst way possible but still ruined anyways. Ever since I posted my last post I've been feeling unbalanced, like I feel like I need to have a relapse. And the thing is I know I don't need a relapse, because they never bring anything good to the table, only tiredness, fatigue, anxiety, etc.

    Also, you seem like you're doing well. The post you posted earlier last week gave me motivation to keep on going. Just reading benefits like energy level spikes, confidence increasing, the ability to want and get things done, etc. All those are awesome benefits. It's like at the point of breaking point, all we care about is relapsing, and while sometimes we still see the negatives, the relapse somehow just looks too comforting and since it's a fast one, we usually tend to take that route.

    This the way I see how severe the order is of breaking a streak: Relapsing (porn or even without porn) > Edging (porn or without porn) > Watching porn

    I tend to believe that relapsing or edging with or without porn are the same. why? Well, if you edge without porn, you're still edging either way. Only difference is that you're not getting much dopamine flowing through your brain as if you were using porn. Why can I say that? Well, I once edged for over 10 minutes without porn and I felt like I got what they say a "dopamine high", I just felt like the room got fuzzy out of nowhere and I was enjoying my thoughts a bit too much. And that session is the reason edging doesn't exist for me, because if I do edge I'm going to have to relapse. It helps in a way because it makes me more strict on avoiding dopamine spikes through anything sexual.
     
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  12. Halibut

    Halibut Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

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    I swear something was in the water with these relapses aha

    I think the best way to look at this nofap journey is as a ratio.

    PMO FREE: PMO Days

    The better the ratio, the better you will feel. Ideally we want to be completely free from porn but I am starting to feel that having that outlook makes the journey more stressful than it needs to be.

    If we look at the ratio and gradually improving that ratio then we can see improvement although we may have some relapse set backs.

    No doubt watching porn makes you free depressed but the pressure we put ourselves under cannot help.

    What I found in this last streak is that past day 30 I didnt really think about PMO, was more engaged with other things that was going on. I was more focused on my health, going to the gym and wanting to socialise.

    I think it @RTBFOP mentioned about having a 'kick ass life' as well as having this PMO Nofap journey

    So this time around I am going to focus more on the other aspects of my life, family health ect, whilst doing nofap in the background.

    Hopefully this will make time pass quicker this time haha
     
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  13. Jerky

    Jerky Fapstronaut

    August 6, 2019

    Checking in
     
  14. Pashka

    Pashka Fapstronaut

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    Seems like there were some relapses, but everybody is still optimistic. That is good to read.
     
    Legit1 likes this.
  15. Jerky

    Jerky Fapstronaut

    August 7, 2019

    Checking in
     
  16. Jerky

    Jerky Fapstronaut

    August 8, 2019

    Checking in
     
  17. FREEDOMFIGHTER47

    FREEDOMFIGHTER47 Fapstronaut

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    I have read the rules and would like to become an AP
    I am a 23 year old male living in Virginia, US. The longest I have gone is 28 days.
     
  18. Jerky

    Jerky Fapstronaut

    August 9, 2019

    Checking in
     
  19. Legit1

    Legit1 Fapstronaut

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    Guys... I need help... So I'm at day 3 right now of this new streak and today I've noticed that I've been getting stronger erections that are combined with urges when it happens. As to make it tougher, I feel like it's also gotten more sensitive, which is messing with me as the urges seem like they've gotten a boost by this. Man... feels like I may, just may relapse in the near future if I'm to be completely honest...

    I'm going to be strong, but I don't know if these urges will get the best of me. Even 2 days ago, I had a sexual dream in the middle of the night and woke up with urges that were tough. I got up and went to the bathroom to cool down since I felt like I was getting too comfortable in my bed, and as I was in the bathroom I just sat down in the ground and seriously telling myself 'why do I gotta feel like this continuously?'.
     
  20. RTBFOP

    RTBFOP Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys checking in. I haven't been on in awhile which I know is a good and bad thing. I have been BUSY. Busy with my full time job, busy with my side jobs, busy lending a hand to friends with all their projects, busy on my own projects, and busy trying to be a dad. I think part of this is great, I'm busy with life instead of busy with PMO. I do think that I may have pushed myself to far though. The past couple weeks have been tough. As much as I thought I was ahead of PMO its slowly trying to creep back into my life. I have not caved and am still going strong but there have been days where I was so close to giving up. I have yet to experience the super powers that people talk about but I do know that life has been better the past 100+ days. I think that when I got rolling and days and months were going by I kind of tricked myself into thinking I had beat it. The truth is in life there will be stress and tough times no matter how great things are. When those times came I think my brain immediately tried to turn me back to PMO to handle it. I feel like I got so busy with other things I got complacent on fighting PMO. I'm hoping in the next few weeks things will slow down and I can get back to exercising regularly eating better and refocusing on staying on track and moving forward. @Halibut I think you are on the right track. One day at a time.
     
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