compulsive masturbation

Hi Saitama999,

First of all, I think you have to distinguish pornography from masturbation since they seem similar but they're quite different concepts. Masturbation is simply the act of rubbing down your weiner... that's all. You can get horny using IMAGINATION or fantasizing about women you like. Using imagination is different from focusing and remembering a porn video. Yes, you're still using imagination, but it's different: it's like your "edging in your mind". I know, everything seems complicated and so many times you end up being confused and not knowing whether you actually relapsed or just jacked off with your imagination...that's why there aren't many people challenging themselves on NoFap Easy Mode (the one which allows masturbation). On the other hand, though, you could still give it a try but I do not recommend it...I'd go for normal mode and I'd look for a loving and sincere relationship with a real girl using my PP only for sexual purposes.

Speaking about your discomfort I believe you are too much stressed due to your exams and I think you're not handling the situation very well. We usually use pornography like the other drugs: to escape reality or to avoid facing it. it's like you're planning to study your exams jacking it off, and you know very well that the only effective method to pass an exam is to STUDY, right? I think that college is a good motivation which makes you want to improve your life but... are you sure about this? I mean, if my only motivation to stop PMO was the university, I think I would start fapping the next day. You might think of the "superpowers", another great source of motivation, indeed, but...is it? Yeah okay, at first it's cool 'cause you find out you're not an idiot and that's a relief, of course! But then what? What's the big change?

Everybody talks about being a better person but have you ever asked yourself what it really takes to be a better person? Is quitting porn enough? I have some news for you: it's not porn that shapes your personality, it's you with your choices! Last two years I got a bachelor's degree in psychology while PMOing every single day from 3 to 7 times. It was very difficult, and I could've done sooo much better...but I did it despite the brain fog, the lack of energy and all the handicaps of being a porn addict. I found my actual girlfriend - we've been together for 3 years now and we live together happily - on day 20 of NoFap. You know well that day 20 it's not day 90. My first thought of being a better person appeared when I was 16 (now i'm 27) and still I wasn't aware of the harms pornogprahy can do. I faced many challenges while still PMOing and I was desperate, I was living in hell and hell comes back at every relapse. But during those days I started a psychological therapy, I started following Buddhism, I dated so many girls (yes, actually you can attract girls even if you fap) and I did what I chose to do. Of course, I experienced all the best of porn addiction: being inconstant, social anxiety, depression, anger, hormonal problems and when I hit about day 70 for the first time I was astonished that all my "problems" actually derived from PMO! The point is: I never gave up! And I'm proud of it. If you want to heal yourself, adimit you've a problem and go seek a solution until you find the right one. If I hadn't been stuck into pornography who knows what I could've accomplished?

I think you have to consider how you're thinking to become a better person. Yes, quitting porn is important and you should totally reset your counter again, but I believe that you can't live under Damocles' sword the rest of your life. You can't continue living on being afraid of relapses. You can't possibly think that you're going to be a good student only if you don't PMO. That will make you exist in only one condition: when you don't PMO! But life goes on and doesn't wait anyone! You have to live it at all costs! Don't let a bad habit tell you who you are! If you relapse, fine you'll start over the next day and you'll continue studying. Can't you focus? Just underline the text and take some notes...that's all. Try dividing your study time in smaller chunks and remember that after the 3rd/4th day of NoFap you'll start focusing gradually better.

In conclusion, decide what's good for you and don't give porn the importance it doesn't deserve. If you'd like to become a good student, you have to study in every condition. Even at day 100 there will be good days and bad days...what are you gonna do? Will you study only during the "good days"? If you want to become a better person, you have to work at it doing the right choices, nofap included but not only that! If you want a girlfriend you got to believe in yourself and break the ice. Do you really expect that the girl of your dreams would just ring your bell while you're having breakfast? My friend, you will be true to yourself if you start giving to your life (and yourself) a proper treatment. NoFap is important but don't confuse an erotic pixel with the miracle and the greatness of your life you're worth more than this shit.

Sorry for being long-winded,

Have a wonderful day!

P.S. I love One Punch Man too!