Confidence With girls while rebooting

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by ts2008mark3, Oct 19, 2019.

  1. ts2008mark3

    ts2008mark3 New Fapstronaut

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    Hello all. I have been struggling with porn and masturbation for years now. I’m in college and have never had a girlfriend. There is a girl that I really like but have only talked to her a couple times at the business she works at (animal clinic). I feel that if I could prove to myself that I’m stronger than my addiction, I’ll have the confidence to ask her out. Any tip or stories to share? Thanks in advance.
     
    Innervision likes this.
  2. Speaking from experience - there is the only thing that can help you with being more confident about asking girls out.
    Just ask them out.
    Don't think about that you haven't talked much with her or that it might be too early. In dating rarely it is too early but quite often it can be too late.
    If she's interested she will agree even if you say it in the dumbest and simplest way.
    If she's not interested then she won't agree no matter what you do.
    The key here is to take action. As you will gain more experience in the future you will learn how to be more smooth with girls, but trust me: just being honest and straightforward is never a bad option.
    Ask her out and update how it went! I am rooting for you man.
     
  3. Innervision

    Innervision Fapstronaut

    That's a major issue for me, too. With time during NoFap you can feel your confidence growing slowly about that topic, but still you have to develop other areas on your life to make real progress. One thing for sure is that you can't put girls on pedestal and treat them like if they were superior. Just try to be your true self and connect with another person in a meaningful way. I'm still learning how to navigate these difficult waters too. All the best!
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  4. Like the person above said, just do it and don’t overthink things. Best case she says yes. Worst case is she says no but you would prove to yourself you can ask someone out.

    Have a plan in mind to do something specific though when you do ask her out. Nothing big for a first time...coffee, lunch, ice cream, etc. You just don’t want to come off wishy washy if she were to say yes and then ask what you wanted to do and you say I dunno while looking down at your shoes. Women can smell lack of confidence from a mile away.

    Good luck and let us know how things go!
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  5. I’m getting out and about more now after being totally immersed in PMO several hours a day, everyday for years.

    The thing I’m realizing is you just have to get out there and do it. Very important thing is learn from your mistakes. Don’t let rejection be a reason to quit meeting women.

    Let rejection be an opportunity to reflect on what might need to be changed in your behavior. Or maybe you did nothing wrong, she’s just simply not interested in you. Either way we can’t get mad, we aren’t entitled to receive positive responses from anyone. Just move on.

    I’ve scared several women off because I was over enthusiastic about their initial positive responses to me. I’ve learned to tone down the enthusiasm and treat women as normal people.

    I do suggest doing a bit of reading if you’re starting from ground zero like me. I’m hesitant to recommend anyone. There is a lot of BS mixed in with good advice when it comes to literature about meeting women.
     
  6. With over 22 years of dating under my belt THAT IS SOLID ADVICE
     
    Branchman likes this.

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