Confused and Need Help

H

HorrayLeap

New Fapstronaut
Hi everyone,

I am 16 years old and have been PMing for 2 1/2 years and recently I joined NoFap. My social skills aren’t that great and I often get social anxiety. After reading about porn’s effects I decided to stop PMing because it was only making my situation worse. It has been 26 days since I last PMO’d and it’s the farthest I have ever gotten. But in the past couple of days I have had a strange problem and I’m wondering if any of you could give me some advice on this. I have felt my sex drive rapidly rise, and whenever I see a girl in my age range, I automatically judge their physical appearance in my head. Most of the time I find myself repeatedly looking at them. But because I’m not good at talking to girls (especially starting conversations with girls), I never end up talking to them. I know this is bad because I don’t want to be judgemental of girls’ looks and want to view them as people too. Though I would also like to go into dating. Is what I’m feeling normal? If not, how can I deal with suppressing it? What are some good tips for starting conversations? I’m starting a job as a lifeguard in a week so I think this will be very helpful. Any advice is greatly appreciated. Thanks :)
 
Thanks for coming to NoFap. It's completely normal to have sexual fantasies about women, especially when you see them in person. Try to guard your gaze, though. Looking with one glance is fine, but if you take two looks at a girl, you may commit lust, which will ultimately lead to more masturbation.
 
Hi leap.

Judging based on looks is shallow but completely human. Theres not a person who is not guilty of it. I imagine the fact that you're doing it more often is your overactive mind trying to replace the dopamine of one act with the dopamine of another.

I suggest trying to help yourself out by talking to some girls with no other intention other than being friends. This should have the double quality of getting you get over your anxiety as well as helping you to put people in perspective which in turn should assist in your objectification issues.

Hope I was of some help. Hang in there! The symptoms are different for everyone and all you have to do is train your mind to be strong in terms of control power and will :)
 
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