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Constant relapse and losing

Discussion in 'Abstinence, Retention, and Sexual Transmutation' started by NeMun, May 30, 2018.

  1. NeMun

    NeMun Fapstronaut

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    hi guys I keep relapsing and I’m not getting laid. Keep making excuses and not moving forward with life. Making poor decisions. Got dumped, the week after that I got robbed, Feel like I might lose my jobs. I need to stop losing . Any tips on how do I overcome this
     
  2. recoome

    recoome Fapstronaut

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    growing a plant has taught me importance of starting small and looking after oneself. maybe that can help you as well.
     
    NICEDUDE, Amarion, goodnice and 3 others like this.
  3. Iwannaquitplz

    Iwannaquitplz Fapstronaut

    When ever your life feels out of your control, try focusing on one or two things that you can control and improve on them. Workout, run, eat better, etc. generally things related to your body and mental health.
    Once you have control of a few things, realise that everything is under control. Sure, you can't control other people but you can influence them. For example, do a bit more at your work and really show that it's more beneficial to them if they don't fire you.
    After these realisations and changes, maybe you can self reflect better with your addiction to pmo and you'll be able to quit.
     
  4. Bijuu107

    Bijuu107 Fapstronaut

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    You can make unsalaried work, than you have more to do and something except your job. You can learn to focus more on people than you don't have to think only about yourself. Because this can make it worse.
    Meditation helps you to accept your feelings and have more control with you and beeing less stressed.
     
  5. Vedas_fr

    Vedas_fr Fapstronaut

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    You are in a negativity spiral. From my own experience, and although i am also a very pragmatic person, you might want to take some time for yourself and release all the stress and negativity accumulated, because you are like a magnet for troubles when energy is very negative.
     
    Bijuu107 likes this.
  6. Joe1023

    Joe1023 Fapstronaut

    So here is my list of suggestions to improve your chances of winning this battle. I've posted these here and there around the forum where I think they're useful.


    - Go to weekly SA meetings and find a sponsor there. To find one near you, go to https://www.sa.org/meetings/

    - Do an internet search for CSAT office in your area (Certified Sexual Addiction Therapist)

    - Find an accountability partner if you don't already have one.

    - Look for help online in the form of literature. There are sexual addiction recovery books, workbooks, self-help books, and other things to help.

    - Start a journal about your recovery.

    - Put safeguards in place to help you stay sober. Think of your weaknesses and eliminate them.

    - Do you take your phone (or any other device) into the bathroom with you and relapse because of it? Then make a rule to never take any electronic device into the bathroom with you, ever. NO EXCEPTIONS.

    - Do you read erotic literature and relapse because of it? Make a rule to never read anything that could ever be found in that section of any bookstore ever.

    - If you struggle with looking at internet porn or any other addictive material on the internet, get an internet filter to block that category type of website as well as any specific site you know you’re vulnerable to and give someone else the password to it. Obviously, you should not have the password.
     
    Bijuu107 likes this.
  7. eliasbartimeo

    eliasbartimeo Fapstronaut

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    There are a number of things that one can think of from oneself. Doing this or doing that. Beyond it, there are other things that in my experience can only be done through God, like transforming us from within. Besides the things you can do on your own (healthy routines, exercise, healthy relationships, friendships, hobbies, etc.), I have found that prayer and trusting in God has really made a difference for me.

    Also, try joining the S.A.A. calls, they are very helpful as well. 12 steps group are consistently mentioned in successful recoveries. Feel free to message me if you need any more information.

    http://www.saapp.org/meeting/
     
  8. Teuthtobetold1

    Teuthtobetold1 Fapstronaut

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    As above, u can turn ur life around and perseverance is the key. Good luck!
     
  9. NeMun

    NeMun Fapstronaut

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    Thanks mate. This is really helpful
     
    Vedas_fr likes this.
  10. MarioZ

    MarioZ Fapstronaut

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    [/QUOTE]
    Everytime the idea crosses your mind to do the fap.....quickly and without hesitation or thinking plug your headphones asap and watch a video on youtube on the negative impact of PMO, this will discourage you.
     

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