Could it be the fapping that has caused all of this?

papaG, I really enjoyed reading some of your posts on this site. You seem to have a great personality. But finding excuses is a way to sabotage yourself. It's a downward spiral where things just keep getting worse... Here are a few things I thought about when reading this thread...

1. Physical activity is key. It produces endorphins, which make you feel awesome, and contribute to all sorts of good results in our lives. PMO makes us lazy, complacent and unhappy (among other things). It's no coincidence that mentions of physical activity can be found all over nofap.com. papaG, if I can suggest one physical activity in particular where your weight will give you and advantage it's Brazilian jiu-jitsu. I've trained it for over 10 years and think it was one of the best decisions I've done with my life. Give it a try: the first month may feel weird, but if you stick to it for three months you will realize the change it makes to your life. As a bonus, you'll lose weight AND pump your testosterone.

2. This is an ace advice! It took decades for me to understand what QCA points out above, but if I understood that women are people and not porn dolls or baby sitters to my emotional demands sooner, I'd have saved myself from some of the worse parts of my life. But there is one very important key to this advice: in order to "be genuinely interested in people", I had to work on seeing real beauty in people... Rather than judging someone for her perky tits or round ass, I'm learning to listen and to imagine myself in other peoples' shoes; to enjoy them for their company, rather then for my hopes of banging them or have them love me forever... This brings me to:

3. DUUUUUUDE! As Kumar once said: "So she's kinda fucking cute. Let her touch your penis." There is no shame in letting people help you, especially if it is a girl who likes you. Judging her is not the way to go... Think about all the things you're telling us throughout this forum; think of the situation most of us are here... I don't know about you, but when I was around your age and if I was a girl, I'd be doing the exact same as she is... Can you guarantee you wound't? But there is something even more important to be taken from this quote: love is caring! Have you thought about that? She cares about her friend so much that she offered to help with a difficult situation. Perhaps this is not the romantic kind of love you were looking for, but it is definitely a strong enough friendship with benefits. I wish I had that today.

4. I think there is a connection. Fapping makes me unhappy; being unhappy makes me whine... I always try to remember that in order to harvest I have to plant; when things don't work out the way I hoped for, I look back and search for the opportunities I missed to invest on my present; being aware that great things can happen in my life as long as I work for them makes me stay focused and commit to what I'm doing. I also try to stay positive when I'm working towards my future as I believe it makes a great difference in the outcome.

 

I would recommend Coach Corey Wayne as a source material to learn about women, how to date them, approach them and what to say. Once you gain knowledge about them, it will boost your confidence. He's also a life coach, and has many videos about boosting confidence, facing your fears, etc. He's the real deal. His stuff will help you, I promise. I also recommend gym, you gotta start sometime, and that time is Now!

 

oh dont worry my friend your not the only one who thinks they will be garbage their first time