I was a smart boy as young kid (age around 14) when I exposed to porn .
Before I found this I was confident kid ,
Then I did not go much with friends instead was searching nude magazines , went buying porn film CDs masterbafing most of the time and almost lost my teenage to porn.
This continued in young age and I was in my engineering college, I do remember many things
1.I was a confident student in first year .
2.Was exposed to some college fights
3.Got in depression
4.Was started following to one of college senior who was himself porn,alcohol addict
5.Day by day I also cut off from college mates , lost my reputation in college due to my closeness with unreputed people.
6.I totally stopped going college and attending classes
7. I was totally free did not have any task
8. I stayed at college hostel , day time when everyone was in college meeting with friends,studying hard, living golden moments of life , I used to wake up at 11 -12 pm and did not go college , on computer and watch porn
9. This porn quality and quantity degraded over the time .(burden of life)
10. Whenever I masterbate I used to start having suicidal thoughts.
Anyways somehow I completed engineering but still porn existed.
Same continued from past 6-7 years of my job duration.
1.In this timespan I did not learn any social skills
2.overturned many good opportunities due to ruined decisions taken .
3. In every few months in frequently I was having a time period for one week or two week I would say it 'severe porn consuming duration' when I just did PM
4. In that duration while I was in job I did not care of consequences of this and lost reputation , exposed myself to office politics, did not took any measure to keep my job designation and lost many good opportunities. Not to mention one where I was in foreign and sent back to my home country as I was out of office for one week for no valid reason.
5. Not to mention PM greatly reduces
A. Emotional attachment
B. Focus on important things
C. Confidence on oneself
6. Over the last 18-20 years of PM quality of porn degraded too much and became burden on my soul .
Right now still it exists and I am married but now I have lost all my emotional touch with family members, have no close friends and missed almost golden period of my life.
I have totally ruined my life because of porn .
Will I get my life same energy to live my life .
Can I see beauty of this world as normal guys see and feel it.
Will I ever be able to love anyone.
Will I ever be PM free.
Before I found this I was confident kid ,
Then I did not go much with friends instead was searching nude magazines , went buying porn film CDs masterbafing most of the time and almost lost my teenage to porn.
This continued in young age and I was in my engineering college, I do remember many things
1.I was a confident student in first year .
2.Was exposed to some college fights
3.Got in depression
4.Was started following to one of college senior who was himself porn,alcohol addict
5.Day by day I also cut off from college mates , lost my reputation in college due to my closeness with unreputed people.
6.I totally stopped going college and attending classes
7. I was totally free did not have any task
8. I stayed at college hostel , day time when everyone was in college meeting with friends,studying hard, living golden moments of life , I used to wake up at 11 -12 pm and did not go college , on computer and watch porn
9. This porn quality and quantity degraded over the time .(burden of life)
10. Whenever I masterbate I used to start having suicidal thoughts.
Anyways somehow I completed engineering but still porn existed.
Same continued from past 6-7 years of my job duration.
1.In this timespan I did not learn any social skills
2.overturned many good opportunities due to ruined decisions taken .
3. In every few months in frequently I was having a time period for one week or two week I would say it 'severe porn consuming duration' when I just did PM
4. In that duration while I was in job I did not care of consequences of this and lost reputation , exposed myself to office politics, did not took any measure to keep my job designation and lost many good opportunities. Not to mention one where I was in foreign and sent back to my home country as I was out of office for one week for no valid reason.
5. Not to mention PM greatly reduces
A. Emotional attachment
B. Focus on important things
C. Confidence on oneself
6. Over the last 18-20 years of PM quality of porn degraded too much and became burden on my soul .
Right now still it exists and I am married but now I have lost all my emotional touch with family members, have no close friends and missed almost golden period of my life.
I have totally ruined my life because of porn .
Will I get my life same energy to live my life .
Can I see beauty of this world as normal guys see and feel it.
Will I ever be able to love anyone.
Will I ever be PM free.