Dating during Quarantine: My Take

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by takezawa2, Jul 2, 2020.

  1. takezawa2

    takezawa2 Fapstronaut

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    Here's my scenario: I left town at the beginning of the government mandated lock down because i lived in a city that has and continues to have the highest rates in the country. When this all began i had an INFLUX of past partners i casually dated ALL reach out at once, i've never felt so popular!!! I decided to reconnect with the one i saw the most potential in and cut off the others- from there this is the outline of my story:

    Phase 1: At the start it was fun, sort of, daily phone calls, talking for long hours and bonding over the fear for the pandemic and reminiscing over the few hang out we did have prior.

    Phase 2: The walls begin to come down, conversations become more personal, the bond becomes stronger but at the same time harder because of the separation and the increased uncertainty as cases begin to worsen.

    Phase 3: Now that this is the new normal, people begin to resume again life while working around the new protocols of the masks and "social distancing". People are beginning to get quarantine fatigue and making exceptions, seeing closer friends and taking the risk for a quick hookup with others within their circle.
    *In this time i am still away in another city* And because of that you loose touch, since you can not see each other theres less to talk about other than the breaking news. As i'm watching their social media i start seeing their activity of being out and about only leaving my mind to wander all day and all night and really just emotionally crumble.

    At the end of it all, it just turns into emotional pain. It is in fact a long distance relationship and ends up being a waste of a connection with someone who "could have been", just good old case of bad timing.

    This all brought me to NoFap. In the time apart i was able to evaluate my challenges in relationship before all of this, it really came down to my addiction to P, and my constant PMO causing me to loose interest in finding a partner which is why i was unable to connect before. I wanted to do better, but now this NoFap journey is for ME.
     
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  2. p1n1983

    p1n1983 Fapstronaut

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    i would definitely keep reconnecting with all of them. You are not seeing any of them in person so you don't have to stick to only one. Enjoy the time you share with all of them.

    Phase 1: Tipicall mistake, you did too much to soon. You talk a lot with her, you were 24hs available to talk to her. You let her know everything about you. Mistery started to fade away.
    Phase 2: Then you began to talk even deeper, she find out everything about you. You were no longer a mistery and woman are like cats, if they know everything about you they get bored of you and go elsewere to look for a new mistery to solve.
    In this moment you are basically one of his best friends, yes.. just a friend. You have a deep connection but you did nothing in person. No kissing, no touching, no cuddling and no sex. Been in friendzone and this is practically the same.
    Phase 3: As it normally happens, the woman gets bored. You have no more topics to talk, because you smoked all of them in phase 1 and 2, so her interest in you dropped. She is pulling away and after all of this you've neven had the chance to saw her in person.

    Next time always keep womans in phase 1. If you can start dating in person after a few months you can pick one of the ladies your are dating and progress to phase 2 and keep it there. This way you are never going to get to phase 3. Always keep them waiting for more, if you give them everything you've got you are going to arrive to phase 3 really soon and she is going to back away.
     
  3. takezawa2

    takezawa2 Fapstronaut

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    Essentially, dating in quarantine is not possible. It frustrates me because there are people who are still willing to hook up on dating apps right now. As much as i want to take the risk i am NOT that bold!!! but i have so much FOMO!.
     
  4. p1n1983

    p1n1983 Fapstronaut

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    Totally, they choose to risk it. I have a friend that is hooking up douring qarantine.
    Then wait until the quarantine is over. You can keep chating in the app but try to talk as less as posible, if you talk too much you already know what happens.
     
  5. takezawa2

    takezawa2 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks, I like that advice. Weather quarantine his here or not we still don’t have cure...
     

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