Day 3 and struggling

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by octo jones, Jan 11, 2022.

  1. octo jones

    octo jones New Fapstronaut

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    Hello all, I am on day 3 and would like some advice.

    Background: I am 28 and have consumed P on average twice a day since I was around 12 years old, sometimes more. I have tried rebooting before but fail around the 2 week mark. When I fail I usually go right back to my old ways for months which fuels my depression and overall low motivation and self esteem. I feel overwhelmed.

    This morning, a fwb sent some photos to me and I was very close to relapsing. We are pretty open with each other so I told her about the reboot and she seemed supportive. She lightly mentioned over the weekend when we were together my inability to maintain an erection for a long period of time (other fwb have said the same thing) which sparked this recent desire to reboot. I realized about 2 years how bad my addiction to PMO was but have not had the strength to fully kick the habit. If I was addicted to heroin the way I am to PMO, I would of been dead from an overdose years ago.

    I understand this journey is different for everyone, I am just seeking advice from people who have done this before and what success felt like to them. Short term I would like to go at least 30 days without PMO then hook up with a fwb. Does anyone think that is to short of a reboot? Long-term I never want to look at P again but if a girl sends me pics its hard for me not to O to them, especially if we have hooked up before, idk why.

    Any advice, tips or distractions is much appreciated bros.
     
    Variegated Lemon likes this.
  2. Blaze21

    Blaze21 Fapstronaut

    Hello brother,
    I read your post and believe it's not going to be easy. I am very happy that you decided to stop. When I was on my first days it would feel like forever. Now I am 100 days clean and believe me when I tell you when I am with my wife I can get an erection for 30+minutes and be able to perform sometimes more than 2 times.

    I am sorry if I trigger something but this is how it helped me.

    I believe that 30 days is a very good time so you can see the effects of no PMO. And about the pictures of your friends, try not to open them if they trigger you, I know it can be hard brother but you have to stay strong.

    If you workout maybe you can start doing it twice a day or go for a run if you feel very anxious. What has worked for me is to keep busy all the time and not being able to even think about PM.

    I hope this helps brother...
     
  3. Variegated Lemon

    Variegated Lemon Fapstronaut

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    @octo jones I'm here for you man! It's hard but def worth it as @Blaze21 said. I was pretty successful in the past and got pretty decently over 100 days but unfortunately relapsed and haven't started back up again until today.

    In my experience, the first 30 days are def the hardest. It was easier for me to set smaller goals then expand them as I hit each along the way. Maybe start trying for 10 days then when you are able to hit that try to keep going to day 20 then before you know it you will be at day 30! That being said, it's hard as shit so be ready and conscious at all times, I like the Buddhist approach, when you are thinking of it just recognize that you are thinking about it, don't judge yourself or feel like you are doing anything wrong, just recognize you are thinking of it and let that be until it passes. If this doesn't work for you make sure to find what does, because in my experience, no matter what you do or how long you go you will always have urges from time to time.

    And maybe I shouldn't have saved this for last but the best thing for me was posting everyday on here and having someone checking in on me. That being said I'll check in a couple of times a week to see how you are doing. Being accountable to someone who knows what your goals are was really helpful to me so hopefully I can be that person for you.

    Good luck and more importantly than anything, keep trying until you succeed!
     
    octo jones likes this.
  4. octo jones

    octo jones New Fapstronaut

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    @Variegated Lemon @Blaze21
    Thank you for the tips and encouragement my dudes. Yesterday was hard but I made it with no re lapse so I feel good about that. I had a bad urge at one point but did some push ups to get my mind off it and that definitely helped. Like Blaze said I am just going to stay busy and keep my mind off it, an idle mind is the devils workshop. I would definitely appreciate you checking on me and holding me accountable Lemon, I will be sure to update this thread with my progress.

    Thank you guys so much
     
    Variegated Lemon likes this.
  5. Variegated Lemon

    Variegated Lemon Fapstronaut

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    @octo jones working out some how (push ups, or I like going for a short run) is def a good way to get over an urge, I also like cold showers sometimes!

    Keep at it!
     

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