day 4: for married men only

as I slowly learn to become a more balanced person, I'm seeing things in a whole new way. I'm learning not to look at porn, over the weekend I deleted all of it from my smartphone. At the same time, I'm learning not to be afraid of my erections. I'm learning the value of willpower. When I'm out in public, I try to look straight ahead like proverbs 4 says, ignoring all sideshow distractions. But being successful in this new way of life isn't just about a bunch of do's and don't. It's about having a better sense of self, and realizing that each day we will grow in confidence as we learn hold our semen in us, let it circulate in us, and then when our wives are available, letting it all burst out and a glorious orgasm! I'm healing myself of my porn induced ed, and regaining my sexual desire, which is part of my identity and something I don't want to lose. The world would have us believe that we will lose our sex drive if we don't look at porn and don't fap. But I'm learning the opposite is true.between August 28 and October 23rd I PMO'd 51 times. This is the first weekend I haven't done it since August 15-17! I feel much better about myself. I look forward to reaching my first goal and then going on from there. I've tried everything before now and nothing has worked. I was at the end of my rope. I thought to myself, is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn't that the real question? The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions, where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.