Day 60 of my Journey to 90 days

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by PowerOverMind, Nov 17, 2020.

  1. PowerOverMind

    PowerOverMind Fapstronaut

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    Hello people,

    I wanted to create a thread dedicated to journaling my progress towards my 90 days goal. The first time I attempted NoFap two years ago I made it to 51 days before relapsing but this time I'm hitting 90 days.

    Part of the reason why I'm making this thread is to add that extra commitment and pressure onto myself now that I've declared this publicly in front of you people as to not turn back.

    I am done being a slave to perpetual perversions and fears lingering in the dark recesses of my mind. I would like to have a sense of control over my desires and ultimately my life.

    I will write down thoughts and observations as I power through this. I'm already on day 4 and I don't know if this is coincidental but I've been experiencing headaches the whole day. Let me know if you guys experienced anything similar.

    Your words of encouragement and support are most welcome.

    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Nov 23, 2020
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  2. FoundTheFreedom

    FoundTheFreedom Fapstronaut

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    Wow, 51 days is a very good streak. You should be proud of yourself. This is my first attempt and I'm at 26 days. I hope you took action before starting on this journey. I'm talking about deleting all porn from computer and phone, deleting all porn bookmarks from phone and computer, installing a porn blocker app for your phone and a porn blocker program for your computer, either putting your Google search engine on SafeSearch or using Swisscows (family-friendly search engine) as your search engine. I did all this and it's helped tremendously. I haven't had headaches from this journey. I have other challenges related to this challenge. I'm a prostate cancer survivor but it cost me my prostate. Having surgery to remove my prostate in 2011, didn't go well and had complications. It was supposed to be nerve-sparing but they accidentally damaged the nerve so it looks like I have permanent ED. Still, this is better than dying. My partner is post-menopausal and has totally lost her libido. She was really hurt when she learned I had this porn addiction. I have decided to eliminate this addiction in order to save my relationship.
     
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  3. PowerOverMind

    PowerOverMind Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for the kind words. They say your problems dwarf in size when you hear those of others. I may not know you but I have a lot of respect for your resilience based on your story, the fact that you're determined to take action despite all the shortcomings, and I hope one day your complications will subside. Congrats on your first strong attempt of 26 days, keep at it!

    I have taken the necessary measurements within my capacity to filter porn including locking SafeSearch, disabling the addition of new extensions while keeping the necessary ones, adding parental controls to my router, adding browsing restrictions on my phone while randomising my passcode etc. It's not perfect as there's always a way but it works as a mental deterrent.
     
    Last edited: Nov 18, 2020
  4. PowerOverMind

    PowerOverMind Fapstronaut

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    Day 5 here,

    I feel an extra bit of vigour within me accompanied with more urges which is understandably normal. This is not to be confused with my previous autopilot habit of just MOing, this is more like I'm in touch with my sexual energy. My morning wood has been somewhat inconsistent with only mild erections at times. I have been experiencing strange dreams which I can only interpret on a subliminal level as a depiction of my guilt towards my perversions. Mental resilience is stronger than ever though.
     
    Last edited: Nov 21, 2020
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  5. Nautica

    Nautica Fapstronaut

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    Good look bro. I'm on day 5 too. We can make it to 90 days together. I'm interested in seeing what the benefits you get are.
     
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  6. PowerOverMind

    PowerOverMind Fapstronaut

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    Day 6

    I've been procrastinating quite a bit lately, I find it hard to focus as I find myself jumping between different things and avoiding my daily goals Otherwise, my urges are stable for now with no headaches.

    I'm exercising inconsistently at home during the lockdown, my daily target is 100 pushups, 30 pullups, 50 situps. I've shifted my attention to self improvement books as well, currently I'm reading Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion by Robert B. Cialdini.
     
    Last edited: Nov 21, 2020
  7. FoundTheFreedom

    FoundTheFreedom Fapstronaut

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    I hope SafeSearch works for you. For me, it blocked maybe half of the porn. To make sure NO porn comes through I switched my search engine from Google to Swisscows. Yes, I know that Swisscows is a funny name for a search engine. You can find it at swisscows.com. Parental controls are good The other thing I would suggest is to get a porn blocker for your phone and also one for your computer. On my laptop, I use a Google Chrome extension called Website Blocker Porn Blocker and it has worked. I use Google Chrome as my browser. On my phone, I have Porn Blocker. Again, I wish you the best on this journey to beat porn addiction.
     
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  8. PowerOverMind

    PowerOverMind Fapstronaut

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    Everytime I stumbled upon a website that went through safe search I would add it to the host file in Windows and hide the host file with an encryption software with a random password that I wrote down and left in a place that's difficult to reach. I've heard of Swisscows, besides filtering porn, how does it perform as a search engine? The problem I have with porn blockers is that I can remove them just as easily as I can put them on, so I always try to find a solution that makes things difficult for me to go back to. For my phone I talked to my network provider and asked them to force my surfing to be family friendly. With my wifi parental controls I associated them with someone else's account so I can't change them myself.
     
  9. PowerOverMind

    PowerOverMind Fapstronaut

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    Day 8

    I've noticed a spike in energy which is making me restless, it's also keeping me up at night as I find it harder to fall asleep. Additionally I've been experiencing some mood swings. Self control is still in check, when triggered by something my train of thought no longer is 'let's go masturbate'.
     
  10. FoundTheFreedom

    FoundTheFreedom Fapstronaut

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    Some of those are very good ideas. Here's why your last two sentences won't work for me. I don't have a network provider as I use the hotspot from my phone as my internet network. The wifi where I live sucks. Swisscows isn't as flashy as Google but it does an admirable job as a search engine. I've been using it for a little over a month and it does the job. What it does is this: say I wanted to search for Pornhub, no results would show up. Same if I searched for "porn websites" or anything like it. It won't even yield results for nude pictures of a celebrity. Since it's so thorough in screening out porn of all types, it works fine for me. What does adding sites to the Windows Host file do? That sounds like a lot of work and I'm basically a lazy person. LOL I have a porn blocker on my phone that works well. On my laptop, I just use a porn blocker app on my browser. It works for me. The only place I'm tempted to look at porn is Reddit but I'm not joined to those subreddits AND I set a setting so that it won't show me any porn.
     
  11. PowerOverMind

    PowerOverMind Fapstronaut

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    If Google fails me too many times I will switch to Swisscows, I was actually impressed with Google's SafeSearch on images though, if you typed something like nude and went to images you will get zero images. When you add an explicit site to the host file it takes its domain name and adds it to a block list. It's being lazy that got me a few times. I blocked reddit a long time ago both on the phone and computer, because I found myself changing the settings back and finding lots of porn. Twitter is also another one I blocked as it has porn just like reddit.
     
  12. PowerOverMind

    PowerOverMind Fapstronaut

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    Day 9

    I was tinkering with my porn blocking settings today and was testing their effectiveness and accidently opened a porn site for a second before closing it, it almost made me relapse but I pulled through and finalized the settings then randomized a new password.

    My morale is quite low , I've struggled to read the last few days, I've been making reading errors left and right and it's been demotivating me.
     
  13. FoundTheFreedom

    FoundTheFreedom Fapstronaut

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    The worst thing we can do is beat ourselves up for any errors or relapses. That will just worsen things. Instead, look at this journey as a learning experience. So you accidentally opened a porn site? No biggie. You didn't relapse so that's a win. You've been at this 9 days and that also is a win. You are making some winning strides. We are all human and guess what? We all make mistakes. Instead of beating yourself up, when you make a mistake, ask yourself what did you learn from it and what can you do to make it better next time? If you relapse, for example, ask what happened that created the situation that caused your relapse? Fix that situation to make sure it doesn't happen again. Then you get back on the journey and try again. I'm past 30 days and I've accidentally seen porn but as long as I didn't relapse, that's a win. I hope you get what I'm saying.
     
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  14. PowerOverMind

    PowerOverMind Fapstronaut

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    Cheers for the proverbial pat, but me beating myself up had very little to do with the slip up to be honest. Congrats on accomplishing 30 days by the way.
     
  15. PowerOverMind

    PowerOverMind Fapstronaut

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    Day 11

    Mood is improving, I was overwhelmed with negative thoughts the last two days for reasons outside the scope of PMO, makes me wonder if abstaining escalated things a little.

    Note to self, don't trim off pubic hair during NoFap, I noticed that feeling the smoothness in my junk boosts my urges quite a bit.
     
  16. abouttime19

    abouttime19 Fapstronaut

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    Please be cautious on writing your own ways to circumvent certain blockers...
    I am hesitant to read forums to avoid seeing people write how they escape blockers.
    Although these are legitimate concerns, I hope that you and others will communicate these types of topic via DM instead public.

    We're all fighting the same thing, so I'm rooting for you.
    But let's be cautious on accidentally hindering others.
    I really wish I didn't read your post :(
     
  17. PowerOverMind

    PowerOverMind Fapstronaut

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    Day 15

    Two weeks. It feels like a little milestone, it's still early days though. My urges lately range between somewhat mild and moderate but otherwise stable. I don't really miss porn as much anymore I have however been experiencing intrusive thoughts and most of it is perverted but it feels like it's slowly fading away. Otherwise the spirits are high. I have to say writing these posts are really helping me push forward.
     
  18. ElderStatesman

    ElderStatesman Fapstronaut

    What’s the plan on day 91?
     
  19. PowerOverMind

    PowerOverMind Fapstronaut

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    Change can be overwhelming if not broken into steps. Ultimately my goal is to wean this habit off completely but for now my focus is on 90 days.
     

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