depressed from breaking up with gf

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by sour.sin, Dec 6, 2018.

  1. sour.sin

    sour.sin New Fapstronaut

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    I broke up with with my gf a lil under a month ago and for a while I felt relieved and happy, and coincidentally I decided to not masturbate for the past week n Ive been feeling really confident and happy but as the weeks go on I'm finding myself missing her more and more and wanting to talk to her but I know that won't be good, and today I actually tried tinder and HON for the first time since we broke up and I thought it would help me but it actually made me feel more sad and I also work out and lift weights but it hasn't improved my mood as much either, im just kinda ranting but I just wanna get my thoughts out
     
  2. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Fapstronaut

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    Wait, you broke it off? Shouldn't you not feel as depressed since you did the breaking?
     
  3. sour.sin

    sour.sin New Fapstronaut

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    That's exactly what I thought, at first I was happy and felt free but as time goes on I just start to miss her more and more, at first I thought I was just thinking with my dick but its defiantly more than that, and also i may feel shitty aswell is cuz ive been smoking weed everyday as of late and I feel like I get even happier when I dont smoke but its surprisingly helps with not fapping so Ive just been feeling shitty the past couple days (doesn't help that today is also our anniversary)
     
  4. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Fapstronaut

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    Maybe you can get her back, tell her you had a brain fart.
     
  5. hmm I had the same experience with a women a few years back I broke up with her because she was an angry mess and and lied constantly and possible in need of therapy or medication , anyway I thought about her after I broke up with her and a couple of months got back in contact with her we started to see each other again then it hit me " dam she is doing the same shit that I broke up with her for, now I remember .what was I thinking? " after that I broke up with her and lost her number and don't want anything to do with her , That was years ago and I and I haven't missed her since
     
  6. While you were masturbating she may have had fun with someone else on the same week... Not even joking, hopefully she didn't... There is no point to suffer... But we men are different... We will refrain from a female for a few weeks or months while girls(not all) will do the opposite, they will fck as many boys as possible to forget ye(some girls never heal, and good luck if you meet one of them), and they will hurt as many guy as possible because of yer decision... it is just stupid... But I hope you will recover soon... Once time passes you will see how stupid all this drama and feelings were... It is deep engraved in our genes, there is not much you can do other than getting distracted...
     
  7. MetaGame

    MetaGame Fapstronaut

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    Well you are supposed to miss her. That is biology. It's better to confront ur feelings and see them as just that. You will have em about 10 other women in time. They come and go. Stay strong.
     
  8. RightEffort

    RightEffort Fapstronaut

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    Exactly -

    It is called biology.


    I had similar experiences. I was with a girl that the sex was incredible w but she at times was a mental mess and every time I would do it - I would feel regret. THen I would break it off, and then the urges would come and then I would go and try to meet other women and my efforts would fail and then I would think may be I can go back to her , and I usually could and so the cycle of pain would start.

    I would go back to her, while knowing i dont want to do it - but my dick was pulling me and my soul was screaming - please dont do this to us - so i would do it, and because I knew i shouldn't do it, It would be more pleasurable for some reason - and the same pleasure would transform in to suffering.

    So then I would do the walk of shame back home, thinking of myself as weak, defeated and undisciplined this would negatively impact every area of my life.

    Until one day I remember I Had the same cycle happen, and I felt like i'm totally helpless against this addiction - I looked up sex addict anonymous - just so I could do something.


    THen on my way to the Sex addict anonymous meeting some how she and I got connected on text, and I remember the day - I got off the bus, If i would go left I could go and fuck her and if i would go right I would go to the sex addict meeting -

    I had already told her i'm coming but I some how found a power in me to GO RIGHT - for the first time in this area I did the right thing. I went right. And i went to that meeting. she was super pissed ofcourse.

    But I remember not long after that she moved out of the province i was in and I felt so liberated and I ended up never going back to the sex addict meeting again.

    It was more like a symbolic demonstration of my decision - that I'm choosing to change my behavior and it required tremendous sacrifice and courage and receiving alot of grace.
     
  9. MetaGame

    MetaGame Fapstronaut

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    I can relate. I've had really good sexual experienced with women who were mental messes. Initially you think you can help and its temporary or even normal but after a while its like what am I doing?

    Idk if you are smart as well it feels like ur having sex with someone who is emotionally a child. Often they are otherwise attractive , sexy and even smart in other ways. Its pretty difficult because in ur head its like ur just a guy and ur having consensual sex and its good man like u start go crazy for it and acting weird good.

    Anyway point is despite ur biology you have to think long term and look at what ur goals are for yourself. When u go back to women ur not supposed to be with even when u feel like u need em it does not take long till why being together is a bad idea becomes very apparent.
     

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