Diary of fantasizing proner

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by ToMMy.H, Sep 2, 2020.

  1. ToMMy.H

    ToMMy.H Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys!
    I bumped into nofap around this time year ago. Decided to join nofap forum this year and created blog.
    I stopped almost 1/2 year ago and my goal now is to get back on track and open new blog where I will update on daily basis.

    Lateky struggling to reach anything higher than week.

    My typical triggers are boredom or feeling the stress and want to release it.

    My strategy is:
    - being mindfull when urges come - 10deeo breaths
    - if it doesnt help take cold shower
    - pushups/walk

    I have never masturbated with my hand. Red smthing about prone and learnt its not really good for me in longterm. I am 26 and already experienced sime troubles during sex - couldnt finish, lost erection.

    Thats the main reason WHY - Stop proning and save my penis

    Second reason is objectifying women. I just think of girls as sex toys and that they are only for sex. Want to change that.

    My problem is not porn itself but the images/stories I create un my head while masturbating. Its really fucked up. Even tho I havent watched porn for 1/2 year+ all these inages in my head I play during my relapses its on the same lvl.

    So this is it. I have pretty busy day so I sould be fine for my day1.
    Lets GO!✌️
     
    +TenPercent likes this.
  2. k3muthomi

    k3muthomi Fapstronaut

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    I was also very into prone but stopped in 2017 and switched to hand. If you have to masturbate again do not use prone!
     
  3. ToMMy.H

    ToMMy.H Fapstronaut

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    @k3muthomi thank you. Thats also my goal. How did it go for you, swicthing from prone to hand? Did you masturbate only by hand? Or tried to completely avoid masturbating?

    I tried to masturbate by hand after 7days+ of abstination, but I couldnt finish myself.
     
  4. k3muthomi

    k3muthomi Fapstronaut

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    I was able to transition and finish myself off. Switching to hand has been better for my penis health and I even had to go to a urologist to confirm if I was ok. All those years of prone had done some damage but he assured me I could recover naturally without surgery. And yes when I switched I only masturbated by hand even though Im free now for about 4 months
     
    +TenPercent and ToMMy.H like this.
  5. ToMMy.H

    ToMMy.H Fapstronaut

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    DAY 1

    My goal besides NOFAP is to create good stable morning routinne. I usually start with short walk (2.5k - 3k steps) with my headphones on listening to affirmation/motivational vid to get started. Then I go for cold shower and meditation. Afterwards I prepare breakfast.

    Today observed 2things
    1) I got distracted in the morning on the walk - > after 10mins clicked spotify and played my favourite trance/edm music -> my mind was all over the place obv :D
    2) By the time I went home I felt cravings for food in my belly

    So tommorow I am going for the cold shower/meditation/visualization and then breakfast and after I go for short walk.

    So far pretty easy day because I relapsed yesterday so I feel both motivated and not tempted to fap at all.
    I also had decent hard shoulder + chest day in gym -> tired AF right now.
     
  6. ToMMy.H

    ToMMy.H Fapstronaut

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    DAY 2

    Smooth sailing for the most part, but in the vening currently struggling big time.
    I even checked instagram where I saw some sexy girls.
    Now having urges
    But I am in the deathmatch challenge and I cant let my teammates donw.
    So there is no fucking was I am dancing with myself tonight.
     
  7. ToMMy.H

    ToMMy.H Fapstronaut

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    DAY 3
    Smooth sailing no more. Its getting baad.
    I had tiny bit of prone edging in the morning but realized whats up and quickly woke up -> cold shower, meditation -> happy with that part. Had very good morning and felt great afterwards.

    Right now doing some homeworks and I am very tempted to just lay down on bed and let everything go.

    I will fight. Not only I want to do this for me, but also for my deathmatch september team!
    I discovered that this thing - taking part in challenges - work for me very good, because I am very competetive and team challenges are even better, because If it was just about me, I might be out of the challenge already.
     
  8. ToMMy.H

    ToMMy.H Fapstronaut

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    DAY 7 - wait what??? Oh yeah baby!!! DAY FUCKING SEVEEEENNN!!!

    This is for me major accomplishment. I struggled to reach 7days for almost 6months.
    I intent to keep going. The key for me is to keep myself busy. Do the work, go to gym, go for walks, meditate, cold showers or even watch some tennis matches -> avoid going to bed at any cost!!! Sleeping only.
     

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