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Different Case - How to handle boners!! [Experienced guys]

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by UniversalSexGod, Oct 7, 2014.

  1. UniversalSexGod

    UniversalSexGod Fapstronaut

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    Okay guys. This is not the typical Rebooting thread. I do need help though! Let me explain.

    I'm 24. Virgin. I did have a PMO addiction at one point of time, although not that serious. I still get boners all the time. Morning wood is very hard! No sexual dysfunction what so ever. However, I do believe I did have an addiction because, even though I did it like a few times a week, I just couldn't get myself to stop. That's when I realized I had to stop. So now I don't want to watch Porn ever again and I'm not interested in Masturbating either. I will only orgasm during sex.

    Now, my issue is a rather funny one. Every girl I look at gives me a boner. I get so turned on I don't know how to handle it. I have all this Sexual Energy waiting to be expressed I guess. I know I've still not fully recovered from the addiction because I still check every girl's ass! I think that will be better after about a few months I'm guessing. It's almost summer time here in Australia and the girls barely wear anything ;)

    What should I do to control the Urge !? (Not to watch porn, I'm just too desperate!!)
    I have boners all the time !!

    I still have anxiety approaching women! This is the main reason I'm here !!

    Any advice would be greatly appreciated !!!

    Thanks
    :cool:
     
  2. napionder

    napionder Fapstronaut

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  3. NoBrainer

    NoBrainer Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    Well I wouldn't say I'm particularly experienced, but from what you're saying with having excess sexual energy, you should try to channel your pent up sexual energy into other aspects of your life. Such activities could include physical exercise, meditation, yoga or dance classes for example. By diversifying your means of energy release you can improve the way your body discharges energy. I do believe that discharging energy slowly through such activities will help you return to a more normal (not so hypersensitive) sexual state. By the way, this stuff isn't scientific stuff or anything, but more based on common sense.

    If you can return to a normalised sexual state, you may be in better condition to cope with urges, as you'll feel less pressure to release energy (by jacking off and releasing it all at once, which through habit of masturbation, we've all become used to doing).

    Also, you mention 'checking out girls'. If you want to stop urges, STOP checking out girls. Just don't do it. The types of thoughts you are reinforcing by continuing to objectify women will NOT help you in your reset.

    Hope this helps. Cheers
    NoBrainer
     
  4. UniversalSexGod

    UniversalSexGod Fapstronaut

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    Thanks guys for the advice ! I've started meditating, it does seem to help. I even work out 4-5 times a week. My erections are normal !! I'm on day 12.

    However, I don't seem to have any improvements in social life. The question I have is:

    Is this still a normal part of the cycle ? The fact fact that I've still not fully recovered even though I've used porn only like 2-3 times a week up until I started nofap!

    I was under the impression that it would take lesser time for me to reboot or at least see some progress !

    any thoughts guys ?
     
  5. Gilbert

    Gilbert Fapstronaut

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    When you say you've had no improvement to social life, what do you mean exactly? Are you going out and seeing people at all or are you staying at home/work most the time?
     
  6. UniversalSexGod

    UniversalSexGod Fapstronaut

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    I go out during the week ends usually with my friends. But I can't seem to get myself to make new friends, meet new girls, know that I mean.

    I do feel turned on looking at a stunning woman, I motivate myself to better myself, by meditating more and other stuff, but as soon as I get home, I lose all interest in women. Could this be a flat line ? My package is totally fine btw!

    Or is it just the fact that my brain needs more time to rewire itself !

    I don't even feel compelled to watch porn these days ! I just do my own thing !

    I'm trying to understand where I am on the reboot phase !

    Thanks
     
  7. jfats100

    jfats100 Fapstronaut

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    First of all, congratulations on committing to this and making yourself better.

    The rebooting process is different for everyone, and remember - you're only on Day 13. Some people take 90 days or longer. Throughout this journey you will may experience different phases of feeling very shy/introverted and then very outgoing/extroverted. Some days you might have lots of confidence and other days you want to flick-off the entire world.

    PMO, NoFap, rebooting... all of this DOES have a direct effect on your confidence and therefore social life. HOWEVER, your social nature is extremely complex and heavily effected by many other factors. Approaching attractive women is very hard for everyone, even other women sometimes get nervous talking to super-stunning women. No matter how well you reboot, approaching women (and even just strangers in general) will require dedicated practice and a total lack of care of what other's may think of you.

    Something that's helped me over the years is to "get out of my head". And by that I mean stop thinking so much. When you're out with your buddies, focus on the conversation, focus on how enjoyable it is to "be out" and experiencing the world.

    Good luck.
     

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