Disgust

Last night I had the strongest urges to defy my pledge to abstain from PMO. I was lucky to resist till I was tired and fall asleep (thanks to good friends staying on the phone).

Today while in meetings at work, and with the full perspective of meaningful employment; I was able to think back on my lustful desires with the disgust necessary to have no desire for my former carnal habits.

How can I be so drawn to these dirty thoughts and women while I have the sweetest and most oure woman to love me??? I feel so out of order...