Divorce-pmo-ssa

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by Dmitriyk1995, Jun 4, 2020.

  1. Dmitriyk1995

    Dmitriyk1995 Fapstronaut

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    So my wife is considering divorce due to my uncontrollable dependency to pmo. I’m trying hard. But every morning becomes a battle ground where I am usually defeated and relapse back to day 1. I’ve never held up for more than a few days without pmo on my own. Issue is, I love my wife but I do have strong same sex attraction that scares her. Any advise? I don’t want to loose her but I can’t keep hurting her. She’s doesn’t know what to do. I want to comfort her, but with my record it impossible to prove anything.
     
  2. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

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    What are you doing to work recovery? You’re an addict so will power will never be enough. Good books Treating pornography addiction by dr Kevin Skinner. Worthy of her trust is a good book for rebuilding trust, helping her heal by Weiss as a good dvd. Intimate deception is a good book for your wife to read and Your Brain on porn . My husband attends sa groups 3x a week. Counseling with a csat can be beneficial if you can afford it.
     
    Tannhauser likes this.
  3. Saythatagain

    Saythatagain Fapstronaut

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    I'm 43 and right there with you with SSA. I'm on my third serious relationship that is technically failing because of my addiction. The online recovery groups are fantastic. The 12-step group is also essential. The huge part of recovery is connection with other guys. And doing daily check-ins and accountability in that check-in. It is a process and it is not easy by any stretch. Once you start seeing that there's more good and what's around you that you're ignoring versus what you keep diving into with every trigger it will become easier. You're welcome to DM me if you want the website where there are several webinars almost daily that you can attend to either listen or be interactive. From there that are normally personal spin-off groups that have been instrumental in my recovery. Good luck to you and until you hit the point of acceptance which happens to be step one in recovery it's going to be difficult to keep going on this path. Best of luck and there are many of us out there just like you. And willing to help
     
  4. Saythatagain

    Saythatagain Fapstronaut

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    By the way today was extremely hard being triggered by my wife and all of her anger and resentment towards me. So I'm at a choice to type a little bit deeper into my recovery and reach out. So by me reaching out to you it is helping me. I get a reminder of where I once was when I started about a year ago and it helps support the path that I'm on.
     
    Tannhauser and dandausa like this.

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