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Do Self Help books really help?

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by APY, Jan 24, 2016.

  1. Jan 24, 2016 #1
    APY

    APY Fapstronaut

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    I've read self help books for years now. They inspire and motivate me. For some people, they can be a catalyst for real change in their lives. However for most people, they are basically porn for the mind. You feel great consuming it, but when it comes down to making real change, you fall flat on your face. What's the reason for that?

    Self help books make you feel good. They make you feel good about your life, future and goals. The problem is, they don't prepare you for the crappy feeling you actually get when you're trying to change. That's when most people fail. That's when the motivation from the self help books reveals itself as a fickle beast. That's when discipline takes over.

    Another thing about self help books is that they take way too long to explain a single point. Take "The Slight Edge" for example. The book is basically saying that you should instill small good habits into your daily routine and the benefits of these habits will compound over time. It is a great and valid point, but takes 200 pages to explain it. These authors have to fill pages up so people buy their books. Although there are a few decent self help books out there, I think the better way to get self help material is through videos or online articles. These are usually straight to the point. Mark Manson is my favorite self help blogger. His articles leave an impact. They usually contain practical information that gives you more then just a good feeling.

    What do you guys think?
     
    APY, Jan 24, 2016
    APY, Jan 24, 2016
    #1
    Bemybest, DRD, Kiddy and 1 other person like this.
  2. Jan 24, 2016 #2
    xeno-R3deemed

    xeno-R3deemed Guest

    The book Boundaries helped me see I had boundary issues and was bad at setting internal and external boundaries. But it did take quite a few words to convince me this was a problem in my life. Good read though atleast it convinced me I had some issues.

    For me I just chase people down who are good at what is missing in my life. Then I just watch how they do stuff and try to capture the heart of how they do their life. I think a lot of stuff needs to be caught more then taught. I'm intentionally trying to add what they are good at into me. Seems to be working for me now. Its a bit slow process but I'm working intentionally at adding some good outgoing habits, good boundaries, and good mental discipline from three different guys right now.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 24, 2016
    xeno-R3deemed, Jan 24, 2016
    xeno-R3deemed, Jan 24, 2016
    #2
  3. Jan 24, 2016 #3
    xeno-R3deemed

    xeno-R3deemed Guest

    @Prinslo Welcome. May your journey be filled with light and peace. If you have any questions or need any help please reach out. You got this!
     
    xeno-R3deemed, Jan 24, 2016
    xeno-R3deemed, Jan 24, 2016
    #3
  4. Jan 24, 2016 #4
    Olaz

    Olaz Guest

    Even if it is porn for the mind, it is better than genuine porn.

    I've read self improvement books and been to a couple "Success" seminars. Not really sure they've changed my life or actions all that much. But I don't think they're a bad thing. Nothing wrong with encouragement.

    Really, the one thing that some self improvement programs offer that could do me good is self discipline.
    Self discipline is hard work. Building good habits is hard work.

    If self improvement or motivational books can help with self discipline and good habits then I'm all for that.
     
    Olaz, Jan 24, 2016
    Olaz, Jan 24, 2016
    #4
  5. Jan 25, 2016 #5
    ALPHABat

    ALPHABat Fapstronaut

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    Yes, they do. But if you read a lot of them, they can confuse your mind.
     
    ALPHABat, Jan 25, 2016
    ALPHABat, Jan 25, 2016
    #5
    Kiddy likes this.
  6. Jan 25, 2016 #6
    Piet_Krediet

    Piet_Krediet Fapstronaut

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    Self help books do help. If you apply them in practice. There is no point in reading books about small talk, seducing women etc if you stay home all the time. For example.
     
    Piet_Krediet, Jan 25, 2016
    Piet_Krediet, Jan 25, 2016
    #6
  7. Jan 25, 2016 #7
    Kiddy

    Kiddy Fapstronaut

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    There is such a broad range of self-help books. I think they are very useful when you are truly ready to change and just need a guide. But if you are just reading them at random, it is hard to actually benefit much. That has been my experience.
     
    Kiddy, Jan 25, 2016
    Kiddy, Jan 25, 2016
    #7

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