Does porn withdrawals cause feelings of loneliness?

Hey, I get that, I got into this habit when I was 13, because I felt completely alone in the world. I don’t know if it gets better but I can give you some words that I’ve modified from Soren Kierkegaard. We stay abstinent because it’s absurd to do so. In an absurd world, what else are we to do. I feel the pointlessness of the world sometimes too. It might have been from porn, sure, but it’s a reason to start questioning the things around you in any case. All of us on this site are Sisyphus trying to roll our boulder up a hill, but hey we can take some meaning in that we continue to roll our boulder up the hill. In that we can create at the very least some point in all of it: that we are fighting against something we know doesn’t feel right. If it gets better on its own though, will you tell me?

 

Yeah man I be feeling the same way to be honest the loneliness strikes harder then usual and yea also empty feeling and emotionless I’m not sure if it’s porn related but yea others say it is , but yea it’s almost the worst feeling in the world dealing with loneliness kina makes u cling onto others well me personally jus my gf n my brother, but if it’s porn related I can say it really F us cause I never felt this level of loneliness before

 

Yes, it's normal.

Through cutting out viewing and social media, you now have far more free time but have also cut out the parasocial interaction you had. Seeing others through a screen "tricks" your brain into thinking you have a lot of friends.

From my experience, the cure is daily affirmations and taking up as many social interactions as possible. From little things like always using the assisted checkout rather than self serve, asking store clerks for advice, etc. And joining social clubs such as sporting clubs, interest groups, a church group (if applicable for you), etc.

You have a huge opportunity coming up if you're going to college in a couple of weeks. There will be endless opportunities to take up any number of social events or join interest groups on campus. The best thing you can do now is to have a nice healthy streak going in to build up that positive confident aura, then aim to spend as little time as possible alone in your dorm room especially for the first few weeks.

 

I know my own porn use has been an attempt to form connections with women completely on my own terms, but of course it’s fake. Social connection is really important and without a significant social life it’s understandable you are struggling.

Give yourself credit, you’ve accomplished a lot so far in addressing your addiction.

I’m also starting college again later this month and I feel a bit restless and bored. I’m giving myself permission to enjoy my unstructured time and solitude as a vacation. For example, I’m reading more for pleasure and improving my self-care routine. I’m lucky to have a therapist I work with twice a week, it helps a lot.

Maybe depression isn’t the right word. How about ennui or angst? Existential despair? Loneliness, emptiness and confusion, as you said, are uncomfortable feelings, but I agree with you, I think this is a phase you can move out of.

 

I think just being a teenager is more the reason for how you're feeling. I remember what it was like to be 18 and I wouldn't want to go through that again. Alhamdulillah I'm not 18 anymore.

Maybe take this time to work on your social skills so you can make friends easier. Most young people don't have that skill I've noticed. They just make friends with whoever's around them at school.

If you hold out and stick through your recovery it will build character and make you more comfortable in life.

All the best to ya

 

The loneliness kills me after a session or two. Usually it would get bad enough that I fap to feel better, but it only adds fuel to the fire