Does reasonable masturbation affect the recovery process?

Hi brother,

Lets revert back to one of the first sentences in your paragraph. You said that you don't have a girlfriend or wife and currently have no sex play mate either. You said that the thought of this is causing you to feel lonely. It's nothing to do with porn and masturbation being addictive either, because it's not. The issue runs so much deeper. You already identified the problem in your first sentence.

It's loneliness. What you need to do is allow your body to actually feel that loneliness. Just sit with that emotion, let your body experience the intensity of it and just let it pass through you. This process is what is called "Emotional Processing" and it's something that I have been doing with everything I face in life since January and my life has never been the same again since. Literally. There is nothing that I cannot face now.

PMO is all about getting to the root of the issue as to why we do what we do. It's got nothing to do with PMO being addictive, and thinking that's the case is actually giving PMO too much credit for it's liking.

The issue is not that you're a man and just need a sex fix. Yes, we are sexual beings, but it's more than that.

Allow the loneliness feeling to have it's way in your body and release the emotion. You'll be surprised as to what other emotions may come up as well. Sometimes emotions like unworthiness towards women, insecurities etc... Some men have insecurities about whether they'll be able to attract certain types of women or not, and even such feelings can cause anger towards women.
Now can you already see how many bottled and unreleased emotions most of us men have towards the opposite gender? These are many of the driving unresolved emotions that are driving men insane and causing them to become addicted to PMO, because they are not processing their emotions. Instead of releasing some of the causal emotions I just listed, they are just using PMO as an outlet instead.

Allow your body to feel and experience every single emotion. Once you've released your causal emotions towards PMO, you'll no longer feel the lust and cravings for it.

It has already worked for me and I no longer feel the lustful desire to PMO, to any capacity. All I want now, is to have healthy sexual encounters with women. I don't even think about masturbating any more.

I will never masturbate again. Why? Because I just don't need to. The key should be to get yourself a woman one day and make love to her for your whole life long.

We've been conditioned into thinking that masturbation is something we need, when that is just so far from the truth it's even laughable.

 

I know I know … I've had endless discussions with people in SLAA about this … I don't know the answer. I'm presently trying full abstinence again. I do buy in to the possible psycho-spiritual benefits of doing a full moratorium. But then, I went for three weeks with maintenance mb no porn and it was great. It eventually ended and things progressed back to bad binging however. Can't say what the causation is though. A lot of people i respect are for full abstinence for a period of time (usually rather significant amounts of time) and then masturbation can be added back in. And when it is, it is masturbation without fantasy. I haven't gotten any where near there yet though.

 

Once every 7 days is perfectly acceptable and is an good way to maintain steady control of yourself. Im still trying to figure out if once a week or once every two works better for me.

Just be sure to avoid all porn and MO at the exact same time every week. Before bed is best because you can sleep through the chaser effect.