Does recieving a hand job from your partner have negative effects?

It's just equaly destructive and it breaks me psychologically the same when I do it myself.

 

It seems to be okay for me if I can't cum any other way. This is when my girlfriend will jerk it for me. I have had no inclinations of wanting to jerk myself, great question, and it may be a negative consequence for some people.

 

No way this question even exists. NoFap is not about becoming a monk.

Any healthy sexual activity with a real life partner is allowed and encouraged.

 

It’s fine if you are not rebooting in hard mode.

 

If she doesnt do it too tight so you develop death grip I do not see a problem with it.

 

Ideally and naturally, the sexual act and the big O, was meant to be a shared between two persons. I am in a similar situation wherein I get sexually frustrated to not having actual sex with my partner (she has a condition that had really affected our having sex) that I sometimes feel I resorted to fapping or even PMO. There are times I feel guilty about doing it alone, as it feels like betraying her somehow. She understands my needs and has somewhat given me the go ahead to fap but now I do it rarely. But it really still would ask her if she could help me with a hand job and she obliges. This somehow takes away the guilt of doing it behind her back. Her doing the hand job makes it special because she is part of it. I am not sure if this is making sense but I want to share it. So as long as it is okay with your partner and should not be a substitute to actual sex between you then I see nothing wrong in it.

 

I would say if a death grip is involved probably not. If you aren’t using it as some psub, like HJ to Facial, then probably not either. Although you only seem to be a day into a reboot, so I would strongly caution against any sexual activity with your partner. If you conjure imagery of P, stop. If you view her as a sexual object, stop as well. For most of us rebooting in a relationship, it is about having connected and vulnerable intimacy with our partner, not about having an orgasm or busting a nut. A HJ seems to take intimacy and connectedness out of it, but that’s just not part of the sex life I have with my SO, so I can’t really comment on it. You need to be aware that any orgasm from you could translate into a chaser effect which leads to relapse. You can certainly give it try with your partner and see if it works for both of you on an intimate level. If it does great. If not, have the conversation with them and figure out what works for the both of you and satisfied your needs rather than any selfish wants.

 

Thank you for the insight on the matter. Really did not see it that way and it does make real sense when you are rebooting.

Thanks

 

NoFap is really not about quitting a particular habit like masturbating or watching porn. Those are just symptoms of the actual problem. And that is your filthy mind. You've trained it and spent years filling it with filth. That leads to bad habits like watching tons of porn and masturbating non-stop, it also leads to seeing women and even your partner mostly as objects when it comes to sex. If you reboot properly you address the issues inside your mind, rather than just trying to block out symptoms. Even the biological explanation, that your brain's hormones are imbalanced, is insufficient to understand the gravity of the problem. We all dived into a forbidden realm of lust, we taught ourselves that it's ok to be seduced by impulses and we perceived sexual attraction as the most important part of a woman. Religion, our own conscious and sometimes even our parents have warned us to go there and in our teenage naivety we all dismissed it as stuck up outdated thinking.

When you start addressing the real issue in your mind you will always have an answer to questions like the one you posed. Handjob's are perfectly fine if it's about her doing it to you and not just about a hand and a pretty face connected to a sexy body.