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Ejaculated while driving . . .

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by +TenPercent, Feb 16, 2018.

  1. Today I ejaculated while driving. Hmm. Many times I have felt like this was about to happen. And, a handful of times in my life, I have rubbed one out while driving. But this is a first, in that I didn't use my hands at all.

    Today is day 55 of no PM, and 15 days since my last emission.

    I have struggled with this a lot in my NoFap challenges. Sometimes I get aroused, sometimes I feel like I am on the verge of an orgasm, from daily events, mostly exercising, walking, and driving, sometimes just standing, sitting, or lying down. Sometimes a triggering fantasy is what gets it started, sometimes erotic thoughts are the furthest thing from my mind.

    As long as I don't give in and masturbate, its clearly a win to get through the experience. But what happens if I do orgasm? It happened today.

    This was not totally involuntary, not at all really, in that
    • I was very aroused
    • I had some vasocongestion (blue balls)
    • I really wanted relief
    • I was hoping I would come this time
    • I drove for longer than I needed to (because I was caught up in the moment and hoping for release)
    • I drive a stick, so lots of moving my legs, sometimes in ways that brought on more pleasurable sensations
    So, the big question: Is this a relapse?
    Or, more importantly: Do I consider it a relapse?

    I'm thinking not (but posting this in part because I can't always trust my own thinking and it really helps to hear some thoughts from outside of my own head) . . .

    For me, a relapse would be stroking it. An internet porn binge and MO would be a clear and undeniable relapse. I've slipped with edging, fantasy, and have had a couple of 2 to 3 minute slips with online porn, but I have kept my hands off of it. I think that's awesome. And the main point.

    I suppose it might happen again. Perhaps involuntarily. This time, as I've admitted, it was more voluntary. If I find myself in a pattern, driving around aimlessly and getting off on a regular basis from driving, then I'll have to admit that I've gotten stuck in a new pattern of masturbation (albeit a little bizarre) and call it a relapse.

    Thank you for reading. Any feedback would be much appreciated.
    Flyhigh and Vulkan like this.
  2. diogo431509

    diogo431509 Fapstronaut


    No, you didn't relapse. Must continue this streak, but, man, try to clear your mind, otherwise NoFap will be very very difficult. Try to avoid looking at girls, and specially the fantasies. Try to meditate and calm down. I took a bus the other day and the juggling always make my dick hard so it's a normal thing for people over 30+ days on NoFap.
    powerful096 and Vulkan like this.
  3. Vulkan

    Vulkan Fapstronaut

    I relapsed a few days ago and had a similar experience, I ejaculated without touching me at all.
    If it were just that, I wouldn´t have seen it as relapse (my goal is no PM, not no PMO) - but I looked at Pornsubs and then even fapped, so clear relapse for me.
    You are also not on hardmode, so I would only see it as relapsing for the case that it develops to a harmful habit.

    Yep, pervert fantasies may be just as bad as porn.
    But avoid looking at girls not to jizz in your pants? We better work on controling that instead of being awkward around females:D
    Last edited: Feb 16, 2018
    TheLoneWoolf likes this.
  4. Yeah . . . I think I've lost track here.
    I called a supportive friend and he asked me what my objective was in doing this. Good question.

    For me, it's easy to get caught up in the intense arousal that comes with all that pent-up sexual energy of not masturbating (more like edging and not masturbating). Before I know it, I'm off pursuing the increased arousal, the thrill of being horny as fuck, getting turned on by the slightest touch or vibration. Yes, that can happen with NoFap. It can be a huge rush and an awesome ride sometimes, but its not my goal.

    I'm looking for healthier sexuality. I want to have real sexual experiences with real women (not getting myself off in my car after getting blue balled by a woman). I want to focus my energy on things like career, school, and fitness . . . and mental clarity. I know that I am dealing with powerful forces here. I put up a good fight. But then I got a little weird with it, got more focused on when the next spontaneous emission will happen.

    I'm going to reset my counter. Considering this a reset (as opposed to a relapse). I think it's a good thing. Need to get back on track.

    My goal is no masturbation in 2018. Still my goal.
    Single Palm Change and Flyhigh like this.
  5. Vulkan

    Vulkan Fapstronaut

    Hope you did not get my answer wrong, me and diogo would not see it as relapse. It is an interesting experience we had, to orgasm without any physical stimulation - a bit like a wet dream.

    I would only see it as problematic, if this turns into a habit that keeps you away from your goals.
    The counter here is just a tool, so reset it or not - I would not in your case, no hard mode, you didn´t masturbate, you didn´t watch porn. If we don´t make a habit out of it and let it be an interesting experience, it will not interfere with our goals.
    Flyhigh likes this.
  6. muterabbit

    muterabbit Fapstronaut

    It was an intentional indulgence to the point of orgasm, but you didn’t know it would result in orgasm. Plus, cutting out orgasms apparently isn’t one of your goals. With all that in mind, I’d say it’s probably not a relapse.

    Sometimes I fantasize without touching myself, but I try to not get too into it, because I see it as a form of edging. From what I understand, it’s the stimulation that releases the troublesome dopamine. The longer you’re stimulated, the more dopamine is released, and the farther away you are from resetting. Both masturbation and sex last just a few minutes, but edging can potentially last much longer.
    Last edited: Feb 17, 2018
  7. Thank you Vulkan and Muterabbit for the support. I appreciate the feedback a lot, especially as I have found myself in a lot of grey areas in past NoFap attempts. For a long time, I defined it as no orgasm. As long as I didn't orgasm, my day count stood. Looking back I see how sometimes that worked pretty well, other times, I was just repeating my old behaviour, looking at porn and stroking it . . . just stopping it right before the orgasm. Not recommended. A lot of blue balls! :D

    This time, I had to go with a gut check. And once I knew that I needed to call this a reset, I knew it was right, because it felt right. I don't think accidents count as relapses, or resets with my no-PM objective, but this was no accident. Not only did I push it too far, I had set myself up for it. I had gotten into a pattern of trying to bring about an "accident", intentionally driving my arousal level up with edging. That experience and the reset helped to break that pattern (I hope!). I don't regret. It was kind of cool really. I got myself off without stroking it. Still, I got myself off, and I'm counting that as masturbation.

    Now, two days later, I'm already feeling a lot of arousal coming back! But it has a better quality. It feels cleaner and more natural. I also started to get those sensations again while driving home from work today . . . it was very tempting to try to indulge it and see if I get off again, but with great won't power (not will power) I managed to turn my attention elsewhere and not let my brain try to get into it.

    For today, that's a win!
  8. Single Palm Change

    Single Palm Change Fapstronaut

    Yeah, you need to recognize your addiction to the feelings of arousal. That tingling, that arousal feeling, "turned-on" feeling - that is setting the dopamine/endorphin wheels in motion, and as a consequence, hormonal imbalance and delayed rebooting.

    I think it is positive that you reset your counter. This is a good signal to yourself that you are changing your priorities, and getting things straight. This is good for your awareness.
    I think you are more addicted to the physical arousal part, than the fantasy/mental image part of things. But this is a good step towards recognizing and being aware, and then stopping it.

    Good luck on your journey!
    Vulkan likes this.
  9. Vulkan

    Vulkan Fapstronaut

    I reset counter again, now already pictures of cleavage and then naked boobs arouse me very strong. So relapse with Psubs. Adjusted my blockers for that.

    Well better than to fap 10 times a day to weird shocking porn, seems not only physical sensitivity is back, but also psychically - what I wanted - so, good progress even though I had some relapses.
    +TenPercent likes this.
  10. Rebooter1221

    Rebooter1221 Fapstronaut

    Its a relapse if you intentially didnt stop things which may lead youbto relapse
    But I guess that you can be half- justified because you already felt pressured and didnt watch any video :p
  11. Vulkan

    Vulkan Fapstronaut

    Yep didn´t stop and even fapped, so clear relapse. Damn it´s new to me that big boobies are arousing me THAT much.
    Interesting that my sexual taste morphed again. But much better than some weird fetish.
    muterabbit likes this.

    WOODROW Fapstronaut

    Interesting story you have. How is life treating you these days? I know that when I go gymn i have to be carefull--- i was on treadmill recently and stationary bike'---one with pedels and gadget to excercise arms___<well i had to discontinue for a time. When driving i munch on some food as i exit main road where i live and keep my mind on more important issues....i get strong urges from time to time. One doc told me that tamulosin a drug to relax prostate muscles so one can urinate---increases one's libido...any thoughts my friend ?
  13. InTheWilderness

    InTheWilderness Fapstronaut

    Not sure if this was asked before and also a bit personal... those that released without touching their wood, my question for you: is your wood circumcised? My guess is yes? I would love to know.
    WOODROW likes this.

    WOODROW Fapstronaut

    Hi there! My wood is circumcised. You think that may shed light on my issue? If you don"t mind, what about you?

    WOODROW Fapstronaut

    did not stay long on stationary bike today but fabulous treadmill workout..

    Now for my ride home! Challenges challenges !

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