I've been a porn user and chronic masturbator for years. I discovered porn originally when I was 10 years old and was left to browse the net unattended. I didn't engage with it regularly until I was about 13 and by the time I was 15 it was definitely problematic use. This didn't change and only got worse when I entered adulthood. For a long time I had depression and it was underdiagnosed. I also developed an alcohol problem. Alcohol and porn then tended to feed each other in a toxic cycle. My life was going absolutely nowhere, and I felt too miserable and powerless to do anything about it. Only last year did I return to university to pursue a degree that I was passionate about. I couldn't keep working dead end jobs forever. It's just too miserable and every day I was finishing my workday wanting to die. Where would I go from there? Drinking and porn of course. Well I'm sick of being a slave to these BS habits. I want to replace my 'escape' from the hard parts of life with something healthy. I imagine I'm not going to be able to just quit fapping without replacing it with something rewarding/healthy. So here I am trying once again to escape the clutches of this toxic addiction. I've managed to kick my alcohol habit and almost 1 year sober now. I want to look back in 1 year and be able to say that same about porn and masturbation. I want to feel happy, energised, productive and on track. I want to be free. And I want to help others on the same journey become free.
