Environmental based addiction

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Lost_forever, Jul 11, 2021.

  1. Lost_forever

    Lost_forever Fapstronaut

    my problem with porn has been heavily reliant on my current environment, living with my family. This has been an observation I've made countless times and its gotten to a point where I know for sure once I get away from them I will not seek out porn ever again, at least not compulsively. I know people are hesitant to believe environments can have such a drastic affect on your life but trust me they can, even more so if the people in that environment are that ones who either feed, or encourage the addiction, in one way or another. I wanted to make this post cause I struggled to understand why I kept watching porn so much, and no matter what I did I couldn't fully stop, I always knew my family had a significant
    Role to play, but I always had doubts until a month ago, I was in a really good streak and I made it a goal to stay away from my family as much as possible, it was working but I soon realized its not enough to avoid I need to get away from here. If you are having problems with fighting porn and you've done almost everything you can to try to get back control, make sure your environment isn't the cause, it doesn't have to be your toxic family it could be your toxic wokeplace, or your toxic neighbors, toxic significant other, toxic living conditions, toxic city, your state could even be the culprit. All I'm saying is that we are dependent on environments, make sure yours is that promotes the behaviors and changes you want, an environment that encourages you to be the best you, don't live somewhere you know hinders or fights back against your goals, and I know some people don't have a choice, but if you do, take the chance and gtfo.
  2. True, though the environment isn't a "thing" and it isn't a one directional influence even if it is huge and makes it very hard. Actually in your situation it's more than just the environment if we consider it's a matter of nature and nurture - since you have the same biology and the "nurture" is basically the ongoing conditioning from day to day. I could even imagine that might be partly why people seek out sex because it is a process of biological/genetic influence different from the existing inherited one but that's another topic.

    This is actually why people need a real recovery fellowship, not just going to a bunch of meetings and running through a script, but to have actual relationships with people, to the degree where there's a local community. The idea is it is a home away from home. This takes a lot of work and mutual understanding, and probably a lot of tolerance, but it sure as fuck isn't going to happen if people think it's just about showing up somewhere to "get" some thing as if it's a material resource especially if it's online meetings.

    In other words, the environment is made up of the people there right? So if everyone shows up with nothing to offer and only expect to get something then why would you have anything? It's like they all have their hands open or they think stuff off the top of their heads is gold because they have X amount of time in recovery about this one thing, but then that doesn't take into the other factors of an environment. ASSUMING they are even addicted to the same thing, are they living at home? What kind of upbringing did they have, sibling interactions? School experience? How old are they vs. how old are you?

    It takes a sense of perspective. And while it's certainly not impossible to have an online community I think people really do not have a realistic perspective about it, it's largely done online due to habit (which prob. includes laziness) because in places where it's all opened up people are ignoring in person meetings and it was probably largely about their own unquestioned expectations before. Obviously some people just don't have as many opportunities in their area to begin with but there's a huge difference between not even looking vs. not having it, you won't know what's possible until you even look or try. And there's also a difference between what works and what's convenient.

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