Erotica, even when you are not looking for it.

I've been doing this (NoFap) for a few years now and I can say that sex scenes in books usually do nothing for me. "She slips off her shirt, revealing her hard pink nipples" or "and then he thrusts into her", blah blah blah.

Sex scenes in movies get me more often, but still less than half the time. Often, if I'm watching with my gf, I just feel guilty for not being more sexual with her or worry that she's going to want it later.

But, back to books. Recently I was reading a thriller and came upon a portion where the woman described

Spoiler: Trigger Warning

going to frat parties to get nailed, some part of her feeling like she needed to do something shameful, and feeling like she'd really used the frat boys / jocks when they surely thought they'd seduced her. All this while she was normally a girl who attracted and dated more sensitive guys"

and, soon after, she describes making love with her boyfriend who focuses on her needs and communicates well, but at the time she finds herself just

Spoiler: Trigger Warning

craving a good pounding

.

This got me all hot and bothered and I ended up having cuck fantasies that evening, imagining that more women crave rough, casual, meaningless sex with such males more than they admit. Felt sure that I would have a wet dream that night if I even managed to fall asleep before the arousal from the fantasies peaked and sent me over the edge.

Ok, yeah, that happened. Here's the catch - I know that it's playing with fire . . . but I find myself tempted to read more books by the same author (even though I'm still only half way through it and still not a huge fan overall)

It's not porn. It's not even erotica. It's just someone throwing some sex to spice up a thriller (It's a female author, btw), but it's still a slippery slope. One more thing that I could get hooked on.

 

Thank you all for the helpful feedback.

Though tempted at times, I have stayed away from erotica (and I have found it best to avoid movies and TV shows, like American Horror for example, in which the sexual content is rather heavy or for which the productions appear to have little redeeming content . . . but if a really good show happens to have a little sex scene thrown it, it's okay, so be it.)

This book was a thriller, acclaimed by Stephen King to be the "first great thriller of 2017"

Just finished it. Good story and character development, not terribly great writing (much like Stephen King). It was a real slow start, but got really good in the last half . . . then had kind of a dumb twist at the end. Oh well. It wouldn't qualify as erotica or seedy fiction by most standards, but the context of the sexual situations was triggering for me. There were a few more "love" scenes, including one where the girl catches her bf sleeping with her bff (a cuckquean) and then takes comfort in the arms of a nice stranger and another scene where the girl has sex with her best male friend, thus cheating on her boyfriend but neither were as triggering as the earlier scenes . . . perhaps in part because I was looking for it and it didn't catch me off guard.