Everything i bottled up

I don't have a quick fix either, but I hope these two points make sense to you and help you.

1. Shame is useless and very harmful to your recovery. Unfortunately it is very powerful, but since it is based on judgement and superficial judgement it needs to end. Keeping track of days is a measurement, you don't judge a thing for not being long enough after you use a ruler to measure it, if we did the same with this issue it would save a lot of unnecessary suffering for people. You work with what you have right now, later it may be different. If it's always about number of days in the streak then there's no self understanding.

2. We need to look beyond our immediate concerns and issues. Yes you need to study, other people need to work and everything but there's a reason why this affects our mind, we're not going to get very far if we never find out what that is. For me, I didn't really connect the things I learn about psychology, self-help and spiritual stuff with this until later - but I did have to invest the time to read and learn about it. If you haven't then it's a good idea to start investigate this stuff.

 

“If you quit every time it’s challenging, you’ll never make it. That’s why only the dedicated succeed. Only the people that truly want it.”

Have you fight until the last second?