Extreme real life story - femdom/findom slavery to a girl addiction - *Possibly triggering story !*

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Kilrunio, Apr 22, 2020.

  1. Prince Macintosh

    Prince Macintosh Fapstronaut

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    None of this is true. You have LITERALLY been brainwashed by this person.

    If you don't live with her, get a restraining order. Seriously. Not joking. Literally get a restraining order TODAY. If you aren't willing to do that, none of us can help you because you WANT to be where you are.

    If you live with her, get a VPN and start looking for an apartment. Next time she's out of the house for 4 hours+, pack and leave and don't tell her where you've gone. You need to break contact IMMEDIATELY. This woman will likely kill you one way or another. She's either sadistic enough to do it herself or break you down enough that you do it yourself. Treat it like a life or death for you. It probably is.

    Can you do either of those things? Are you willing to do either of those things?
     
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  2. TimeToQuitNow

    TimeToQuitNow Fapstronaut

    You are welcome. This community has helped me a lot too. It helps me to know that even if all our situations are slightly different, we are going through a similar thing and are all in this together.

    After all the abuse you went through you deserve this
     
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  3. Prince Macintosh

    Prince Macintosh Fapstronaut

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    Might I suggest the possibility that you actually don't want to get better or get out of this abusive relationship? Otherwise, you'd be accepting some help. You might want to examine the depth of your mindfuckery and consider the possibility that some part of you wants to be abused, even though you don't deserve it.
     
  4. WhiteLion

    WhiteLion Fapstronaut

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    Kilrunio, I told you in private that I suffer from OCD. I am working on it and I can tell that I am slowly making progress. In these posts, you are describing Rationalizing, Mental Rehearsal, Reassurance Seeking, Analyzing Hypothetical Scenarios, and Mental Reviewing. Do you know what those remind me of?

    I know what it is like. Years ago I was sexually assaulted and I spent years wondering why I allowed that person to touch me like that. That was a momentary lapse in judgment and I did not fight back. This is worse then that. You need to stop thinking about what will happen if you stop this. Just stop.

    So many of us focus on streaks, and self knowledge, and self improvement; but sometimes that is the wrong way of being. You are just some asshole staring at a screen, imaging things.

    Kilrunio, thank you for showing why this way of relating to others is bad. I think you may have really helped some people.

    Just stop.
     
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  5. Kilrunio

    Kilrunio Fapstronaut

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    Thank you Lion. Im very sorry to hear you were sexually assaulted....thats the worst..i cant even imagine what thats like, i only heard from one gu ywho still suffered from it with panic attacks...maybe you were so shocked back then so you didnt fight...

    I hope others too will stay away from this shit....and tbh...back in the day i hoped...thought yay i can be popular..have a cool femdom story like other guys...now i want this topic to be forgotten..i dont like when its in the high end on the forum..too many views..i want this gone..people need to stay away from this shit...

    I truly know no why women cant escpate abuse and why so many men cant escape..its first now i got distance and stopepd spending money i think clearly....i wont spend more money on her..im so done....backthen i was scared of losing her...now i can speak my mind to her and demand fun..but its not how its supposed to be...seeing her once a week is awful...even every second week is awful..."Rationalizing, Mental Rehearsal, Reassurance Seeking, Analyzing Hypothetical Scenarios, and Mental Reviewing." this is so true now i think about it...especially analyzing hypothetical scenarios...wow...yeah...

    Just need to stop.

    This is the simplest message, but yet so profound..Thank you my friend. "Just stop"...that eliminates all excuses...I will just stop...yes...no need to think what if or be scared of her...its time to just end it...and not worry or think why did i let it get to this or feel i lose something...like with a girl i once tried to date and gave up everything...i cant lose what i havent got...and this girl right now doenst care about me, doesnt respect me, doesnt want to give me fun..its nothing but money hungry girl and me doing chores and errands..and her doing the minimum....paying her to add me on social media only to be deleted right away..paying for al sort of silly stuff..and recently its been way worse with me having recordings of her saying im a loser, not a man, and tring my best to be as unmanly and a loser as possible in front of her eating garbage, old foot, paying for her lunch while giving her my lunch money and getting old food from her fridge...it could not be worse...i recently talked to her gf who said she had a gf who would love to punish me with her...maybe then i could get the main girl to join and have my fun...but i know.. no no no no no...im gonna follow my plan and just end it...i dont have my car here next week..but when it comes back - ive already decided, im gonan go see her and im gonna go say goodbye.

    She asked me today while i had my car to see her and i said no.

    So its gonna be weird but its gonna be good...ive also called her out on her manipulation...like she planned to have a grll party with her gfs like i think i mentioned...and she didnt want me to arrive on the day and then make ready..so we spent an entire day making ready doing all sort of errands...and what happened? no grill party that week...

    She would also tell me if we were gonna do the 24/7 slavery i paid a gucci bag for...it should be now as she would be busy next week...but when i was like nah its okay, im good. She got soooo mad, and i knew

    1) she would never ever do this for me - she just had plans to use me that day and thought this would fit her...
    2) she said it´d be a long time before it could happen if not now..lol its already been 6 months and it hasnt happened...

    Thing is she wont give me my fun so i dont even care about it....and sure enough i was right she just wanted to use me.... ieven ifxhed her playstation thought she would be so happy but well she deleted me fast from social media despite me paying around a hundred bucks to be added back...i paid more money around a hundred bucks too for recordings of her voice.

    Her gf gives me way more fun...but i dont like her as shes the one who punched me back in the day..also never feeling i give or do anything.

    I thought to myself today - you can´t turn a taker into a giver...and these are takers at the highest level..im a giver...all i can do is learn from this and use this experience to safe me from future pain so in that sense it has been worth it and ive "won"...it has made me realize to not being a victim and stand up for myself...so many times in my life ive been sweet to people knowning and feeling they´d screw me over and i´d be right.... i remmeber how i tried to get more and morem oney like a drugaddtc hoping she´d stop spending money and now hse said she did it because i never said stop...recently when she asked me to shop for her i said no...because last time she didnt pay because i bought something wrong...like ok then pay the rest but no..

    Shes awful...calling me her shopping slave...im so sick to my stomahch having spent around 15000 dollars on this shit..i feel like i got nothing out of it....i coul dhad spent it wasy smarter on more fun...on trying the date stuff..on saying okay here is 1000 now let me stya for a day and give my mfun or two her and hf a f and try my fun fantasies...

    i thought i could pay and we could be having fun and do fun stuff...but no...

    Rule number 1) Dont waste time on a girl who doesnt care about you.And if she cares for you she likely wont want to do femdom...
    all girls are followers...i thought a hot popular girl would be a leader..but no all girls and women are followers...as men all we can do is try to get a high quality woman who follows us..thats it.

    All the femdom porn stars and all that too are fake...so so fake...its ruined all my fantasies..but its good. I can now move on...but i feel for all the other men out there suffering..
    Ive seen them how they are so cute and girly with their boyfriend/husband..its all fake...but how dont thye feel bad about making these financial ruin videos..or loser videos...it really fucks with your brian..like i sometimes can only jerk to garbage videos, being called a loser or beaten...thats so unhealthy..now finally i can to imagining kissing girls, and being with a girl...but like other guys said on this forum..sometimes we just want to self destruct..its terrible....we have to protect ourselves, our sanity, our mental and financial health and wealth at all costs.

    I´m currently bulking big time. Ive never been this big..and im trying to increase my testoterone - it makes me feel and think how stupid this is - and this girl is nothing. her lover boys are nothing... all i really do now is procastinate when to end it...mentally ive been out of this for a long time..and like other guys said on this site, there is always a nice fantasy...its sunk cost fallacy bias - where you extend it because you´ve lost so much already, like people holding o nto a stuck, staying in a bad relationship etc.

    When my car is back. I´m gonna go drive to her, and end it. I´ll update the topic by then - ive also made future plans. There are some exciting plans i have...and then time will heal all of this. :) Its gonna be ok.

    I really hope you´ve recovered from your horrible sexual assault...that is way worse than anything ive been in...i should not speak at all - now what youve been through is something...i can only wiah you the absolute best and maybe one day im lucky i´d be in a position of power and who knows - maybe meet you without knowing its you - and give you a helping hand.

    I so wish to give back to every brother on this site. Ive never seen such a community. Ive realized i want to give way more effort and time to men than girls - men and a true brotherhood...its so needed in these metoo/femdom days. Because in my mind men are number 1%..its just that its like the pyramid...1% of men on top..then all women..then the rest of men...we need to step up our game.
     
  6. Prince Macintosh

    Prince Macintosh Fapstronaut

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    I maintain that you don't want to actually end it. If you want to end it, why on earth are you planning to go say goodbye? GTF out of there and don't say goodbye, don't look back. Driving to say goodbye to your abuser is a trap to prevent yourself from leaving. Not sure if you just don't realize that or don't actually want out. Worth some self examination.

    Let us know when you're out of the environment so we can help you with RECOVERING from the abuse instead of listening to you complain about the abuse in which you are complicit.

    Harsh, yes? Certainly much less harsh than the shit to which you are currently subjecting yourself.
     
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  7. Kilrunio

    Kilrunio Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys

    I just wanna say its over now

    Im no longer her slave

    Its done

    It was actually her who ended it - for a long time i had been trying to finish up a ton of work i had, i told myself when its done then i wanna end it

    Ofc this was procastination and stupid. Then i finally told myself how stupid this is, and said i dont need to finish my work after trying to finish it for motnhs and where i would only work a bit as overall i was a bit of a zombie.

    Then she tried reaching out to me like 10 times or so for all sort of different errands, and i think she tested me one last time hwere she said it´d be under an hour, if i could be useful - also calling me useless etc.

    Then she asked why no response. And i first replied 3 days later.

    I know from experience girls cant stand rejection and this girl often have told me she wont put up with being ignored, or would spam me on facebook, calls, whatsapp etc...So i think she had enough.

    Im good at reading people and a rule of thumb is if i feel its not going well she is feeling it too. So - now it seems im blocked on her phone...i figured it´d happen i mean she coudnt take more away - since she had salready deleted me from facebook and her snapchat long time ago when shes angry.

    Her gf also not responding now - after asking me last week

    For a long time i tried seeing her once a week or every second week..this now its almost a month since seeing her...mentally ive just been so drained....mentally not been feeling well and just been down...i wanted to go see her gf once then her...just seeing her was so hard for me as i felt it distracted me from work.

    Anyway i feel its a shitty way for it to end..her not even giving me a response....i told myself it would en dthis week, see her gf, then her, then i realized i dont need to see her like you guys said.

    I figured i´d just give her a call.

    So ofc that feels bad to have messed it up because of that as i really wanted to be the one to end it. Because in all areas of my life with people im always the one being dumped o rcut off - because i keep tolerating it even when i should end things. I keep trying to make it work..whiuch makes me passive aggressive and pull back when i finally cannot do more....and this relationship thing has been the most toxic thing of my life...its been abslutely horrible......... she has been the worst i could imagine...but no wonder...drugs...smoking..tattos..even if she regrets it...problems in her life...anger issues...and well one of the last times i saw her when she smoked in my car i had asked her to not smoke in it - and she told me if other people said she should stop smoking in their car she would, but not in mine, as she had no respect for me.

    Being told that, i loved it....i kept seeking to be as pathetic and disguting as possible to her...i could totally feel she has 0% respect for me.

    So overall its good its over -- -but ofc i know me seeking harmony...i dont like conflict im shy of conflict..and worse is..i heard an interview from a guy who had bad energy around him and he too said it just sucked to end it with people, there was anger..but he had to do it...that opened my eyes.

    All i can take from this going forward is to not let myself be walked over, and stand up for myself.

    Like i told her, it sucks to be dumped as a slave..you´re not even good enough for slavery...i figured i´d be too useful to her - but i think and i was right - i know how this works i was 100% spot on my intuition is extremely good - and i figured she´d get to the "F this" point and felt it wasnt worth it.

    When i read our old messages i also realized how sick this whole thing had been.... like this has been so horribe...i started listening to interviews online from dommes and i realized most if not all of them are good women like kind - they are not these horrible dommes in the videos....so yeah....

    Anyway it sucks it ended like that.... part of me wanna try go see her, but i kno wits over....but it just feels stupid it ends with 0 words....and i feel guilty for that because i knew it was coming and i all i needed was to just give a response..a text or a call to her and now i´d have to work so hard to get back again...but no its over now..this was second time.

    I tried texting her and calling her and i think im blocked.

    All i wanna ask you guys is
    should i do anything to like end it - or what if i ever see her? i just dont like it ending badly - i rather saying goodbye properly like i imagined in my head so many times.
     
  8. pkrm

    pkrm Fapstronaut

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    this looks like a fetish fantasy shared to get rid of the shame associated with the fantasy, if it's real then you enjoy. Who's stopping you,
    Are you a Jekyll and Hyde?
     
  9. Kilrunio

    Kilrunio Fapstronaut

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    Not sure what you mean.

    Def dont wanna do this stuff. I just like harmony, but dealing with conflicts and not being shy of conflicts is something i have to learn to live with. And to stand up for myself for sure
     
  10. pkrm

    pkrm Fapstronaut

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    what you are today or at the moment is the result of choices you have made in the past. The responsibility of having chosen a life you had or having currently totally falls on you. But if you want a different life go ahead boldly. You need not carry the baggage of your past. GO COLD TURKEY. BEST OF LUCK AND LOVE
     
    Last edited: Jul 13, 2021
    Kilrunio likes this.
  11. g2stop

    g2stop Fapstronaut

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    You have to realise that your mind is still fucked, you still think femdom is fun and you still think you can have “your fun” with this girl or her girlfriend. Only when you realise how fucked up this is can you start to heal.

    You still contact her after she blocked you so you still want this with her and you are in denial about that

    face yourself, face your demons, wake up, forget about her, forget about femdom, have a great life!
     
  12. g2stop

    g2stop Fapstronaut

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    Stop imagining how you think life should be, accept life for what it actually is
     
  13. ankith

    ankith Fapstronaut

    Just move on in life ffs, why do you still keep clinging on to her. I know you have been with her for a long time and it's sad to be abandoned but aren't you asking for too much? you agreed to be her slave and still you expect her to respect you, what kind of stupid logic is that? If have accepted yourself to be a slave then you must be willing to abandoned whenever she wishes, that's what it means, that's what you signed up for. Now, since you are free, just live a life dude or go to therapy or something to stop the craving of simping after femdom girls. I know it's hard for you to digest everything, but you need to accept reality and move on and stop thinking about her.
     
    Kilrunio likes this.
  14. Kilrunio

    Kilrunio Fapstronaut

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    You´re right...I get easily attached, and i read as a submissive you get strongly attached to your "owner". I used to think about her morning and evening, afterall when first met her i sorta tried to hit on her, then first contacted her much later after we met in the beginning

    You´re spot on about the respect + slave. It is a totally stupid logic. I know you´re right. Whenever i asked her she would say what would i need her respect for, and that yes she had lost a lot of respect. And i´d do things and ask wil lyou lose more respect if i do this and almost get off on knowing she would look down on me.

    But when i started it i asked her what if your bf asked for this would you be open minded without losing respect? Because being open minded is very rare these days and she said yes. I felt she was open to it...but i think another woman ive talked to was right, shes not a domme just a girl using me. I totally get now why victims of abuse have a hard time leaving.

    And you´re right as a slave you´re a slave until she leaves or you stop she did also say when its no longe rfu nshe stops...i mean i knew and felt if i didnt see her soon she´d had enough...it had never been that long...i used to see her all the time but then i really made it less..only once a week or second week..now i wanted to end it so badly, i barely wanted to see her..so i think she had enough after asking to see me ove rand over and over and i kept saying no or i was busy. It makes sense...i tried seeing her a vit ti prolong it...but i realized all the fun i paid for she would never give it to me

    Like her party with her gfs...she wanted me to fix her house before that day..so i spent an entire day like doing chores...but the party never happened...i never got my 24/7....and i dont spend money on myself and when i do im very smart about it..but withher? im litereally just throwng thousands of dollars away runing myself financially..its horrible how deep i got.

    Its my own choices for sure.

    But its just man, this other woman i know, shes the sweetest ever. Shes helped me so much, always cares about me, never demands money from me, is so sweet makes videos for me, listens to me - and we have so much fun together. Its like shes had lsaves for 10 years she said and shes a highly succesful woman, super sweet and playful. Shes just so perfect. Like thats how it should be - she cares, she also keeps telling me these girls are just using me, they have no respect for me - and that i only get hurt here. Tat they are not true dommes.

    I get it now how this whole female stuff works now. Also why shes attracted to the guys she are, its so easy like i.e height, or other stuff. Andthe girl def aint special shes full of flaws. And no matter how well things are, the day atfer it may be shit and she may be angry...when i read our old texts..i couldnt believe how abusive she had been

    Like f she told me to drive her X days, i´d say i can do that and that day but not that day, and she´d not accept it....first when i put my foot down..i used to think i had to keep spending money, until i put the foot down.

    Its so true when people say people treat you how you let them, because girls i demand respect from and dont take no shit from - they become submissive/behave well. While this girl i even reinforce that yes im not a man, im a loser. Etc..even bought recordings of her telling me im a loser..i think femdom is a short cut to attention - it doesnt matter if its bad, i still get her attention.

    But why it bothers me man is my ego i think - i wanted to be the one to end it - but i displayed all traits of not wanting ot be her slave, she even told me to tell her that i didnt want it no more....i also got so sick of everytime being let down that i never gotthat much fun from her....her gf has her flaws too but i get way more fun there.

    But i thought about it and its not right - none of them are - if i were to do this i should do it with the other woman, but the thing is its like a guy told me - you sort of want these girls to really think you´re pathetic and despise you...if they are sweet and just act its not the same...but at the same time you want respect...i feel like there is basic human respect like she could at least had told me why she doesnt want me now even tho i feel i know it..she said shed write but no...

    I looked at our very old messages before this slave stuff - back then she was very respectful, said i was a sweet guy - and that we got along very well..she has admitted we could be friends but i chose slavery and she only sees me that way.

    But being dumped as a slave - being dumped because you said no to seeing her and even tho you knew there was a high risk of having enough and you having seen her behavior hebfore..yet i was too arrogant and thought i´d just do my stuff and then come back...i had some rough stuff recently...i tried telling her that now i got time again

    But seems like now its fully over...i also wish i myself put a stop to this. I guess only way i can do that now is to not contact her and say ok its over.

    But yeah its time to wake up the man in me - and leave this toxic shit behind.

    I just think this slave stuff could be done with respect like that woman i talk to, but hten its not 100% slavery i guess, only if you agree for the next X hours... i just didnt expect this girl to be how she was...like even when i told her i had stuff to do she would be like "im not done with you". And she actually got so annoyed she had to do her chores herself...like wow thats some entitlement right there...i thought she knew thius slavery was meant to be fun and playful...even if we did it hardcore...but i think you´re right i asked for too much...its hard to degrade a person so much and then still care about them - it just doesnt fit...yet femdom lovers hope it could work...women despie weak submissive men and doesnt are about making them happy and if they do they do see you as a man and then its not actually that real...

    Its like you want to be this total loser, yet have your fantasies fullfilled...it doesnt make sense...only way it could work is if you´re lucky enough and can present ideas they like too - that would be so rare...no its stupid...you can do lafyul kinks like with the woman i know but thats it...what i did was foolish.

    At least ive seen how fake it all is too...its fake or abuse..thats pretty much your options like online dommes are fake, and real domems here is just abuse..

    What I need to do i think is find a sweet girl - become a man, and let time do its thing and put lal this behind me, i had some fun, not all - i learned a lot how to have done it differently..but at the end..im very tolerant but i was worn out....worn out by the abuse...trying to make harmony....still i think the girl is stupid we have some good times too so much fun...but its like it doenst matter, like she said she truly sees me as her slave...she laughs at me for thinking diffrently...she id say if sstarted as firends then slavery it´d be different...

    But yeah my fantaises are stupid, only a sweet gf or the woman i know would fullfill them...that or abusive girls...which is toxic for you.

    It really is that attention you get off on.

    But i feel clear in my mind...im ready to start a fresh.

    Thank you seriously for the replies, i know you replied a lot in this topic before too. And sorry for my ramblings and my stupid femdom brain. Its such a contradiction to my buisness me. Its totally opposite. I think its due to the feeling of being inferior, and shortcut to attention..im 100% sure if i become strong, feel superior and get attention from other hot girls like i did in the past - i wont care for this. Whenever i get angry i also lose all desire for this femdom shit.

    I just had this dream of submitting to one girl, while being a leader elsewhre, but its a fantasy...this whole pet stuff wont work with girls who wont care for you.

    I will start by working out again now, build so me testoreone up too. And get my life going.

    Thank you - like real thank you - for being able to call out my BS, thats what a true friend and someone who cares would do - not cuddle me with my own bs - so thank you, i think im gonna re read your replies a lot - it keeps me to reality.

    One day i will probably look back and think what a fool i was...i already do that to how i was at first with her...now its the next step to become a man.

    Ph and yeah thats what really ruins it..when you see the men they date and you´re like lol thats nothing you cant submit to her when you feel you can beat this guy/is smarter, or when you know you can get hotter girls... i really have to try to imagine im a loser, becaue otherwise it fails...because deep inside..i know im not inferior to them.

    But when you jerk off to femdom it just gets so extreme...started with foot ended with castration and ruin...so sick...Time to get back to normal.

    Thank you again Ankith and the rest. Hopefully this topic serves as a warning to not do this.
     
  15. Kilrunio

    Kilrunio Fapstronaut

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    Spot on. You´re right, totally femdom mind fucked....I will! Will try to do that! Thank you for saying it like it is....so stupid how i think i can have my fun....really need to just realise it...and ive started to do that, i can feel how i think much clearer now on a lot of things. Still got work to do. So will keep doing it.

    Im a sucker for harmony, but to try and have a harmony ending...ye thats kinda silly...Need to just toughen up
     
  16. ankith

    ankith Fapstronaut

    castration?
     
  17. Rationaliser

    Rationaliser Fapstronaut

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    Reading older texts, trying to get in touch "one last time", etc are just tricks your mind is using to try getting you back in the situation. It reminds me of how my mind always manages to surprise me with its tactics to make me fall asleep when I'm trying to deprive myself for long periods.

    Ask yourself if somewhere within you're still wishing that a sweet-and-peaceful farewell will lead to a new beginning of your relationship with her or her friend.

    You're not yet free of her emotionally, it seems. And that's nothing to be ashamed about. You have to start with recognition and acceptance of the facts, however.
     
  18. Kilrunio

    Kilrunio Fapstronaut

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    Castration fetish. There is a lot of it in the extreme femdom. Obviously so messed up, but yeah. its that extreme cruelty of you meaning nothing but being laughed at and used, and a girl totally rejecting you.

    Sort of not looking at that anymore tho, but i did once a lot.
     
  19. Kilrunio

    Kilrunio Fapstronaut

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    You´re right. That really is tricks. Ive started to think about that, like its like its all our brain yet its like half our brain wants us to do something or tries to trick or tells you to keep eating junk food, while we also know with the other half whats going on - its like so contradicting. But really thats an excellent point.

    I also started thinking about pros and cons etc.

    She got back in contact for now, but as soon as she did it was like..yay but..meh i wanna end it..its probably just my ego me wanting to end it.

    Im thinking re ending it - i dont see to see her, i used to think so. I can just give a phonecall and if she doesnt pick up i can just send her a text, and then thats it. I guess after that i should delete and block her number.

    I have been thinking about changing phone numbers, just to get a fresh start sort of. Would that be a good idea? Im thinking about it, like cut her off and do it.

    I wanna keep it simple - im putting way too much thought into this whole thing about how to end it...i just need distance to it all..i guess i dont wanna hurt anyone but i need to protect myself mentally, physically and financially as this has been the worst.

    No more need for words reall ytime for action i should had ended this such a long time ago...so no matter what i wanna endit so like i dont wanna have to have a phonecall like if she doenst pick up a text and thats it...maybe i need to block so i dont give a chance to respond otherwise she may try to guilt trip me or some thing - maybe not but i wanna protect myself.

    So maybe call/ and if not picking up, text straight away just that im done, goodbye. And then block and delete. I will probably think what if she responded, what did she try to respond, and be curious as im super curious - but i gotta make a dec here...cut it all of...
     
  20. Rationaliser

    Rationaliser Fapstronaut

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    Do you have a sense of purpose in life that you look up to? Be it fendom or other addictions, you'll keep falling into them if you don't have that existential hole in life filled up with a sense of meaning or purpose.

    You're trying to fight the negative emotions of your fendom addiction with positive emotions of the associated hope for a better life. You're running on a pleasure-pain spectrum. I used to think that life was just about optimizing the pleasure/pain ratio and that never took me anywhere.

    I think your issues don't end with fendom, or even with addictive behavior. I don't know if you like your profession but you might only be doing it due to fear of financial instability or because of other strings related to pleasure and pain. I wish I could explain this better.

    I'd suggest you find that additional Y axis that transcends you beyond just a linear life of emotional optimization. I can suggest some books/content that helped me out personally.
     
    Kilrunio likes this.

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