False Arousal vs Natural Arousal

Right, well, that was easy…. 24 hours done. Actually it still is a little victory, and I like little victories, because you see, I have for a long time used masturbation to get to sleep. I suppose that is part of the addictive mindset and in that respect I have achieved something great….. and hey, think of all the underwear I will have now actually in my underwear drawer and not scrunched up under my bed!!!

I think difficulty getting to sleep will be my first hurdle though, as there has been nights in the past where it has not been feasible to masturbate in bed and my mind starts playing tricks on me and will simply require orgasm for me to relax. And so it goes on until I either get up and take sleeping pills or go to the toilet and invent a quick fantasy for me cum to and bribe my mind into thinking that I’m sleepy.

Some nights I don’t even want to masturbate and yet I do it because I fear the repercussions of not being able to sleep if I do not. Some nights I fucking hate the fact that I have to find visual stimulus to cum Just so I can put it away and get to sleep. But last night, I got into bed, I lay on my back and took a moment to contemplate the importance of just being able to relax my body naturally and the positive growth that will be achieved by becoming naturally aroused rather than when I imagine that I want it.

That’s actually something that I am looking forward to experiencing and investigating, ‘natural arousal’. I mean, I love looking at women, like…. Seriously fucking adore just looking at them and admiring them. And I feel an arousal and I enjoy the feeling of arousal, but I pondered yesterday that what if the arousal that I perceive to be enjoyable, is not at all what my mind and body is capable of! What if, my masturbatory habits have numbed my ability to experience a true level of human arousal and the result of this challenge will be that my enjoyment in viewing women will increase!! That will be completely wonderful, what if the feeling that I enjoy at the moment can be improved?! What if the arousal and enjoyment that I get admiring a woman’s breasts, that I perceive to be a ‘level 10’ enjoyment experience is only a ‘level 7’ experience to the unaddicted male? These are questions that I am truly excited to explore. Because for a while, in my preparation for this, I started to panic in way that was as if I was giving away my enjoyment of arousal, and it took me a little while to allow myself to understand that this process will be about increasing my level of natural arousal, and I cannot wait for that.

It’s a concept that I am increasing excited for, even as I type this, I am increasingly excited for it. What if I have denied myself the true feeling of human sexual attraction by falsely building a tolerance to it, as any addict builds tolerance to a drug. Perhaps the arousal that I adore so much will be gifted to me again in an increased manner? A manner in which I can revel in and allow to fill me up and enjoy with new eyes. Perhaps women will become even more magnificent to me and I can reexperience that beautiful and quite safe addiction that is natural human sexual arousal.

False Arousal vs Natural Arousal…. That’s what this will be about for me.

‘Up The Rebels’

 

I'm really looking forward to seeing how my interactions with women will change. Its good that you say you noticed a change in your feelings to them after a little over two weeks. Ive never been that long so I dont really understand how difficult that journey is or 'How far away' 15 days really is.

 

Thanks, mate. I sure will. I think self development will become more of a focal point for me as I move on, for now I'd just like to get through 3 days without false arousal! Never been that far.

 

Me too, I'm only on day 4 and am already feeling my desire for false satisfaction increasing quickly. I'm about to have four days off work so I'm anticipating a bit of a challenge. Because it was not unusual for me to just spend a whole day off in some kind of fucked up porn trance. I'd set my alarm early to maximize porn time, get straight on the PC and All of a sudden I realize I've been at the computer for 5 or 6 hours and then decide to skip lunch because it's wasted porn time.