Fantasy

Mental discipline is crucial in recovery. The process is simple but difficult.

1. Freeze each thought as it enters your mind.
2. Run that thought by the Spirit to see if it is true.
3. Expose the lie and exchange it with the truth.
4. Exercise the truth, and live in it instead of the lie.

Do that with every single thought you have, and you will be FREE.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1zqVL11JjWICOHCRUDmqXr9TNC_gpb6yhRF1hKp-fxcc/edit

It takes time to build up the discipline, but it can be done. Many have. Checking in with an AP every day is helpful in the process.

 

Practice concentration of mind man, one pointness. You cant stop any train of thought why do you obssess about sexuality.

 

Son of Thunder,

Pretend you're in a battle and you are protecting yourself against these unwanted thoughts - visualise holding up a shield, it works for me. Also allow yourself to be angry at the thoughts, but it must be controlled anger and never turned against yourself - you are treating them as your enemy. That's of course assuming you are not projecting these fantasies yourself, if you are then you probably want these fantasies come true in which case you should be questioning your goals (no judgement implied here friend, I could be wrong).

Last night I had to sit through 30 minutes of a full unabating erection as I had to fight off a very inappropriate and unwelcome fantasy. I just sat on the end of my bed with a deep frown (helps me) with an aggressively defensive (if that's not a contradiction) posture then kept saying "NO!", and "It's NEVER going to happen" etc; the thoughts were very intoxicating and arousing. They came in waves and the worst I've ever experienced. Needless to say, I won!

 

This will help

 

Honesty.

A lot of it comes down to that. If you're honest about it being a fantasy or a delusion, then that truth automatically takes the steam out of believing/indulging in it.

If you're honest about it tempting you, and there's that other part of your mind that's already really hooked, then at least you have the honest part to work with. This is where some discipline is helpful, because as strong as the psychological and biological pull of porn is it isn't what we would call disciplined, and in the end the mind that is disciplined will win out even if it takes time and work.

Down the road you may have a more complicate situation: Suppose you meet someone who you think is great and of course there is some tendency to want to fantasize over that vs. porn, but of course human relationships are not easy. Being honest about not understanding women/relationships where to go with it and not being clear you may ask people for advice even if it is online. Rather than just taking action based on a positive fantasy of happily ever after if you are real with it and work through it that will also protect you from harm.

 

Understand it's no different than actually watching porn