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Fapping is not the problem (but still, don't do it)

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Deleted Account, Jun 3, 2019.

  1. After 1000 days or so (jk maybe, hopefully, for some of you at least)...

    You'll realize that PMO is a fantastically effective costume that all your other problems hide underneath and melt together to support.

    I'm not saying that you shouldn't focus on quitting. You definitely should. Whether or not it's the cure all for what you don't like about the way you feel, not fapping is:

    Not P = not desensitizing yourself to every stage of visual cues real women can use to remind you of all the other sensory and emotional bliss they can provide if you have something to offer them.

    Not M = not defying physics and physiology, not convincing your body that this is sexual pleasure instead of what someone outside your mind and body can provide and instead of the arousal of arousing someone else.s

    Not O = not depleting your life force, haha seriously.

    But still...

    You'll get better and better at this, but it requires some thinking backwards and then practicing it... a bit further each time. When does the urge hit? At that moment, focus inside your body. Where do you feel it? It's not just in the obvious place. If it's there that you can identify, fine... focus on that but don't act on it. Where do you feel it now? Keep going in this way...

    You're going to have a ton of thoughts and feelings. Now you know. It's these. These are all of the problems, and none of the problems. Whatever you're feeling right now as you're ready to fap... that's the problem, until you focus on it and you conquer it. Then you're going to feel something else. Does that direct you back toward the desire to fap? Do you recognize the path? Okay, that's the problem. Focus on it, conquer it. What's happening now? And so on...

    Caution: This is an intense process. You're going to unearth some seriously powerful physiological feelings and emotions. The urge to relapse is going to be worse than ever. Everything you hate about yourself is going to come up, more and more likely the farther you get into this.

    Guarantee: If you get through it, you will no longer have the urge to fap this time. If you continue to practice it, you will never have the urge to fap again.
     
  2. FantomZ1

    FantomZ1 Fapstronaut

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    I agree with you! Well said.
     
  3. Fenix Rising

    Fenix Rising Fapstronaut

    1,955
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    +1000 days, nice run man, congrats. Have you fallen into deep depression / anxiety after you quit PMOing? If so, did it go away and when?
    For me, being in monk mode is like stop taking sedatives. I was all numb due to daily PMO binges, now I'm so depressed and anxious I can hardly function. If I can't do my daily aerobic exercise routine I have literally problems doing anything during the day.
     
  4. Awedouble

    Awedouble Fapstronaut

    Well this is the difference between just abstaining, or perpetual relapse prevention and a journey of self discovery - where I'd say real recovery starts happening.

    There will absolutely be hard times, urges or not - my urge has diminished a lot but I can't say I'm at 100% mental health, and frankly life is just hard, some of us have it harder too and don't necessarily get more support. At the same time, pain isn't the only measure of health - precisely because we are not numbing ourselves and that itself is a big step in the right direction.

    I think this is why we need to work on all aspects of life, if we do once we discover something deeper in this process it will not feel like it's yet another huge obstacle that we are totally pessimistic about overcoming, it will be big but we will have had some experience working with that and know there are ways to deal with it.
     
    Fenix Rising likes this.
  5. Congrats man!
    What's your addiction length?
    Is this streak hardmode or soft?
     
  6. Agree with all of your points.
     

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