Fapping is the only way I experience sex

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Tass57, Dec 20, 2015.

  1. Tass57

    Tass57 New Fapstronaut

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    I'm 19. I'm male. I'm a virgin. I've dated once in my life before, 5 years ago. I'm short. I'm scrawny. I'm ugly. Women don't want me. Fapping is possibly the only way I will ever experience sex in my entire life. Why should I stop?
     
  2. Maybe you can use nofap to improve yourself.
    Save your energy
    Exercise
    Build muscle
    Interact with girls
    Maybe then real sex will be possible.

    BTW
    By Fapping you aren't experiencing sex. Not at all.
     
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  3. Maybe you only had that one relationship because you think you are scrawny, ugly and short?! Because the media tell you how a decent guy has to look like? Because dumb girls are manipulated to be attracted to this kind of guy? C´mon be real man. People change, beautiful people may become ugly. Ugly people may become beautiful. So what. If you don´t even like and respect yourself, why should others?

    Fuck what the media says, fuck what the others say. you look good and are a decent guy at heart, just wash the dirt away, period. You can think I am a lunatic, I don´t care.

    I care about what people feel and think in general
    But I don´t give a f... what others think about ME.
    So should you.

    By the way masturbation is always called self-sex but essentially it has nothing to do with sex. Lol how could you even have sex if you don´t wanna even try?

    And if you don´t think you look good enough, then just earn a lot of money, get a good humour, learn to be charismatic and charming become eduacted and smart. Girls dig that too. And if not you can still go back to fapping after you gave some real shots!
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 21, 2015
    Jae, Wildstar and Irish Explorer like this.
  4. Zpeshnak

    Zpeshnak Guest

    Man, as other said you just have to exercise, build muscle, be more social and also improve in other areas of life, do something you like read books, learn new languages or how to play an instrument, something interesting and than you can be passionate about. That will make you a great guy, after that or in the same process comes being flirty and all that stuff. Cheer up man! You just have to give it your all!
     
  5. calo9025

    calo9025 Fapstronaut

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    I know what your going through. I'm 25, still a virgin, dated once in my life and struggle through the same self-esteem issues that you are going though. I kinda hit a rock bottom moment about a month ago as nothing in my life was going the way I wanted it to and I was super unhappy. I came to the conclusion that using PMO to fill my void wasn't cutting it anymore so I was going to take this nofap thing seriously. Also, I'm exercising and taking other steps to improve myself. I'm about 22 or 23 days in and not all of my problems are solved but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Its way out there but I can see it. I've been able to talk to girls now. Nothing has come from it but hey it's improvement.

    Like I said, I know exactly what you are going through. I've used that excuse many times to keep on fapping and fapping has got me nowhere. I don't want you to go through as many years of this crap as I have. Please, just listen to me and all the other people who responded to this that gave some good advice. We will get there one day if we put in the effort.
     
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  6. I was like you too,I didnt lose my virginity until I was 21 and before that fapping was the only way that I experienced something sexual.You are still young and your whole life is ahead of you.I used fapping as a mask or a band-aid for everything in my life.Sure,it made me feel good for a few minutes and then that feeling went away.Reality set in and my problems were still there,they didnt go away.Neither will those problems that you have right now,unless you start thinking postively and focus on your purpose in life.Focus on where you want to be,where you would go or see yourself in 10 years or 5 years.If you have passion or something that you would like to see yourself doing for the rest of your life,focus on that!

    If you want to improve yourselfor how the way you look,go to the gym,workout trust me,you will like it.You feel good about yourself.Women like men who feel good about themselves,that's self confindence.If you want to meet like-minded people go out there and seek them.Things might look pretty shitty right now but nothing ever stays the same.I wish you good luck and stay on the right path.
     
    WarriorScarr likes this.
  7. avatarivn

    avatarivn Fapstronaut

    No offense, but fapping to porn is not sex (from what I know, its not even close).

    About your question, I can assure that , once you stop PMO (the technical term for this triforce of social anxiety and dismotivation : Pornography-Masturbation-Orgasm) you will see improvements on yourself that will make you ask "Why DID NOT I stopped before?"
     
    CrisNet likes this.
  8. Icyweb

    Icyweb Fapstronaut

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    I'll add something a little different from the advice others have given you. First of all, I don't know what you look like or how tall you are, so you could be short, scrawny, and ugly like you say, but I don't think you are. I suspect you are on the short side, don't have much muscle, and are average to good looking, but maybe in need of a haircut/style and maybe some grooming on facial hair/eyebrows. (Don't go overboard with the eyebrows thing though, it's better to have a little too much than too little.) The second thing I want to mention is that sex/pleasure are not the biggest or best things in the world. Sex is necessary to continue the species, and it helps to bind men and women together chemically, but there is so much more to life than just a basic animal instinct to feel that pleasure. There's music, books, sports, clubs, work, and literally thousands of other things worth doing. Have you ever gone outside just to watch the sunset? Or to feel the grass under your feet or the wind in the air? Those are completely non sexual and also completely worthwhile pleasures to take part in. Masturbation is not sex. It is an addiction fueled nightmare. Wake yourself up. If you don't like being awake, you can always go back to the nightmare, but I don't think you will. You are stronger than that.

    Go do something worthwhile now. You might try some basic exercises like pushups, planks, crunches, or running. You'll feel like crap at first, but then you will get stronger. My best streaks (time away from pmo) have almost always been after I make some improvement in my life. If I start working out, I have more success. I got a job, more success. Give worth to yourself and you will feel a greater desire to help yourself by quitting pmo.

    You came to this website for a reason. You know pmo does not make you happy. I believe in you, so should you.
     
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  9. Icyweb

    Icyweb Fapstronaut

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    Btw, being a virgin is nothing to be ashamed/embarrassed about. I'm a virgin and proud of it.
     
  10. zadvanceppa

    zadvanceppa Fapstronaut

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    What everybody else said. Yes. 2 of the best girls I ever had sex with were considered less then beautiful.
    Old song lyrics " if you want to be happy for the rest of your life; never make a beautiful women your wife. "so in my personal point of view ;find an ugly girl to marry you".
     
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  11. Keemo

    Keemo Fapstronaut

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    You don't have to stop, dude. You are free to do with your life as you please. These forums cannot convince you to stop fapping, they are simply here to tell you that the day you choose to give NoFap a shot, the whole community is there for you to support you and help you reach your goals in life. Good luck!
     
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  12. ItaliTrey

    ItaliTrey Fapstronaut

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    I really hope you didn't give up man. As many guys that I know who are considered "short, scrawny, ugly" that get girls left and right...that's all your opinion. You keep up with the PMO and you'll think of yourself as that all the time. Go 6 months and see if that girl you've always wanted appears. I dare you.
     
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  13. Yesodi

    Yesodi Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    Look around at the multitudes of other men who -- despite also being short | scrawny | fat | ugly | poor | stupid -- have nevertheless somehow found their "other half" in life. Whether you explain this as Divine Providence or simply "good luck," you need to throw away that negative mindset! And you yourself will soon turn into the next short and scrawny person that will serve as a positive inspiration to some other "undesirable"!
     
  14. IGY

    IGY Guest

    This "undesirable" never found anybody. :(
     
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  15. Yesodi

    Yesodi Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    Don't lose hope!

    And on the flip side, keep in mind that quite often (from personal experience) "finding somebody" does not always lead to a "bed of roses"! Any given state or situation in Life will always have its own mix of positives and negatives. And so, I'd advise to "enjoy" (or at least take advantage of) the hidden advantages of your current state of singleness. Leverage the "freedom" that you now have to invest time and energy in various aspects of your life, before these opportunities disappear or become much more difficult the moment you need to share your life with a significant other.
     
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  16. NoBrainer

    NoBrainer Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    Only because you never let yourself find anybody. :rolleyes:
     
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  17. Fappernator

    Fappernator Fapstronaut

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    Word of advice...fapping is not even close to sex, even when it's not so good.

    As long as you think this about yourself how can you expect soneone else to think differently about...you are what you project out to the world through your thoughts!

    Change your mindset my friend, you are unique and unlike anyone else, go out and give your gifts to the world.
     
  18. Wildstar

    Wildstar Fapstronaut

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    You said that nothing has come from your abstaining from PMO but I disagree. You're talking to girls, building up your self confidence, advising other folks on this site and learning in the process so my friend, you have acquired a lot and applaud you! I hope your journey is fairing well and you have a great new year! Keep it up.
     
  19. bastion

    bastion Guest

    I used to be roommates with a guy with mental retardation, not a severe case, just problems concentrating and filling out forms. Still, the diagnosis was there. Did it get him down? Probably, to some degree. Did he get laid? You bet. He's 28 and 25+ girls "under his belt"(Sorry about that term), the way he talked about it, I know he wasn't lying. How did he do it? He didn't give two shits about what anyone thought of him and just approached anyone he felt like. Doesn't even own a cellphone.
     
  20. calo9025

    calo9025 Fapstronaut

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    I think I meant nothing came from it as in no dates or anything with the girls I was talking to. I will agree that it has built my self-confidence. I've had a few bumps on the road as far as my reboot but I am still determined to beat this.
     

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