Fear of performance

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Adam08, Jul 24, 2018.

  1. Adam08

    Adam08 New Fapstronaut

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    I literally just created this account because a while ago I noticed a problem with my "unit". Let's just say that it didn't rise up to the occasion when it was needed. I hope you all get what I'm saying here.

    Now, I decided to stay of porn, masturbation or anything and been like this for about 15 days already. But now I'm getting paranoid because everytime I kiss with my GF, nothing happens down there... Now I'm literally affraid of intimacy because I am affraid this performance problem will happen again.

    My quiestion is - how long does it usually takes for "system to reboot"? How long should I wait unitl trying it again?
     
    Last edited: Jul 24, 2018
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  2. Tokenator27

    Tokenator27 Fapstronaut

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    Its all a mindset thing. Your body to an extent will reboot but it has to be mental as well. Time and practice and patience are the only things I can offer to you as advice.
     
  3. Adam08

    Adam08 New Fapstronaut

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    Sooo, basicaly your advice is to ruin the night with my dysfunction untill it starts working....?
     
  4. StillAWarrior

    StillAWarrior Fapstronaut

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    Try not blame yourself, try not to think every moment about your performance, it is logical to be anxious about your performance after this addiction, it is normal ! Give yourelf time, try to discuss your feelings with your GF, Work out more, eat healthy, quit smoking if you do, and try to relax and just enjoy the moment ! Be positive and understand yourself, love yourself again !
     
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  5. Tokenator27

    Tokenator27 Fapstronaut

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    You aren't a computer. There is no "reboot phase" you can type in and magically you are cured. So yes, either try try try try try and fail until things work...or don't try. There are no psychologists on here and even if there is they would be the first to tell you that no 2 people are the same. You have to find out what works for you and at your speed. So yes again I will say time and practice and patience are going to be the key.
     
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  6. Jason_Tesla_19

    Jason_Tesla_19 Fapstronaut

    Everyone takes a different amount of time to reboot. Some people may take a month, some people might take a year. It seems like the peak of the bell curve is somewhere around 3 months, though. It's not a sudden one day completely dysfunctional, to completely functional the very next day. It's a gradual process with ups and downs, until you are healed "well enough" to perform "well enough" with a woman, and further improvements taking time until you are at peak function.
     
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  7. TheManDude

    TheManDude Fapstronaut

    I don't think that a night could be ruin by you healing a real problem, a person who cares about you will understand... besides you can make your GF have a good time by doing other things like massages, oral or other things that she might enjoy.

    It's an opportunity for improvement in other areas of sex and intimacy so maybe focus on that could help you in the future.
     
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  8. Tokenator27

    Tokenator27 Fapstronaut

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    Ultimately, did you come on here looking for advice and help, or for people to tell you what you want to hear?
     
    TheManDude likes this.
  9. It took me about 100 days without porn or masturbating before I could have sex without see-alis and Vyagra
     
  10. Stop overthinking
     

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