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Feel unwanted.

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Deleted Account, Jan 2, 2023.

  1. This is just an underlying feeling I have been having lately.


    It’s not just a few family members, but friends I have met in the past and have seen recently in the last year and some co workers, managers.



    For family a big one is my sister and her husband.

    It’s a bit of a story and it just feeling like a loss with communication.

    For friends it’s a few that I’ve had interests with that have just ceased to respond to me for no reason.


    A friend I have on facebook I’ve commented on his statuses that trigger for a response, the last time I’m sure he would of said something but nothing…

    I’m not sure if it’s this addiction or people’s views of me. Really unsure.


    I’m wondering if anybody is having any other problems like this being deep into this addiction? I’ve heard people can gravitate towards you in the long run on recovery.


    It just sucks when you’re trying.
     
  2. lemn

    lemn Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

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    Hello brother,
    Wishing you a good time of day. First of all, wanted to congratulate you on your journey to become a better version of yourself. You are wanted - even if it does not seem so. How nice it would be to hear a word of encouragement from a familiar face! How great would it be do hear warm words from a friend. However, ours is the road of hardship. When dealing with PMO, the silence can be deafening (almost unbearable). And I wish this road gets easier - it doesn't. We just get better/stronger.

    Again, I want to remind you that you are not alone in this journey. Your inner voice (the same voice that led you to this website, the same voice that encouraged you to start this journey) will keep you company.

    I prayed for you.
     
  3. Don80

    Don80 Fapstronaut

    Maybe you should look elsewhere. But it's just a thought. I mean outside your family. The problem with me has always been that I wanted a true friend and true relationships. I wanted to talk freely with that person without feelig insecure that the other person will laugh at anything I do or say. The truth is this forum is the only such a place. But even here it takes a lot of luck to open up and find a sort of a friend. But those online friendships can take some of the pain from loneliness. Feeling somehow connected to anyone helps an introverted person like me.
     
    Last edited: Jan 22, 2023
  4. This is exactly I want to pursue on finding friendship. I really only have my girlfriend and two of my close friends I have spent time with since High School but ones in Hawaii and the other is 3 hours away. Just feels as if everyone has drifted away like becoming friends with them wasn't a big deal, never get a hi, how are you doing, how's life?

    Don to be honest I feel like a ghost. I commented on the same person's facebook post and absolutely nothing back to me but I see replies to others.. I think it's gonna part ways very soon with no interaction.
     
    Xue Hua Piao and Brain-Police like this.
  5. Don80

    Don80 Fapstronaut

    I feel similar about my old "good" friends. They ghosted me as soon as we stopped living close to each other. Somebody on this forum told me to accept the fact that friends come and go and advised me to lower my expectations. It was hard for me at the beginning. Distant relationships are not the same as real ones. I guess it's also a question of being available when you need a person to talk to. If you feel like talking about anything, you can send me private message.
     
    Brain-Police and RacineRedeemed like this.
  6. Brain-Police

    Brain-Police Fapstronaut

    We are social creatures my friend. We need each other, physical and emotional touch from each other, some more than others.
    I am a pretty solitary person, but I myself get very lonely and would like to be held every now and again.
    Best thing to do man is work out, write about it, or go out and meet people.
    It's totally natural to crave socialization. Nothing wrong or shameful about it whatsoever.
    There are a lot of great people on here in this forum, we're all here to heal and help as much as we can.
    You can always reach out, or if you need that real-life interaction, join a club or do "Meetup" dot com
     
    Abel100% and Don80 like this.
  7. DeonisGood

    DeonisGood New Fapstronaut

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    Yes, I think a change of scenery can help
     
    Don80 likes this.

  8. Look man, friends in adulthood are hard to find and hard to keep. That is just the way it is.

    Before you start hitting up people on social media, next time consider allocating that time to your mission.

    Because whether you chase people or manage to capture them, still your life goals and priorities are the thing that should be foremost in your mind.

    What powers the pursuit of goals is the hard mode reboot. With accomplishments, you can break free into a good life. Other people will want to join you, but they probably don't right now in this state.

    Success attracts people.
     
    Don80 likes this.
  9. Don80

    Don80 Fapstronaut

    Or makes them jealous too...
     
  10. TheLoneWolf88

    TheLoneWolf88 Fapstronaut

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    I feel the same way. I feel like a ghost, and in turn I give myself so much hatred because I feel ignored.


    I'm a guy and I can't even ask someone out because I still have a fear of rejection
     
  11. Don80

    Don80 Fapstronaut

    You need to leave your comfort zone where your brain wants to keep you. The more often you leave it, the more confident you will be. And accept rejection as a price. Remember that not everyone has to like you. The same as you don't like every person you meet. You could use nofap power to build your confidence first. If you relapse, the next day you feel self-blame and your confidence goes down the drain. Even short streaks count.
     
  12. Yes, for certain. But that's their problem. My problem is working towards success.
     
    Don80 likes this.

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