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Feeling motivated by a cute redhead. Is it wrong?

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Deleted Account, Dec 12, 2019.

  1. This sounds stupid, but I haven't nutted in over 48 hours and haven't watched porn for I think 3-5 days now, and instead of feeling awkward and ashamed like I usually do when going to the grocery store, I just felt like how I normally do when I don't give a shit.

    Anyways, I saw this cute, tall, curvy redhead that I see sometimes, and I couldn't help but to think, "Man, if I can just get a vehicle or my school money real quick, start my online freelancing career, and lose some weight from cycling to and from the library and doing some bodyweight training, I bet I could easily get her to go on a date with me."

    But I usually fuck up somewhere along the line when I want to date someone, and I tend to fall into the trap of letting my horniness and desire for one particular person distract me.

    All I know is that my sex drive is higher than usual, and I feel more and more ready to do whatever the fuck it takes to live a life where I can experience freedom and romance instead of staying somewhere shameful where I don't belong.

    What do you guys think?
     
    NF SINCE BIRTH likes this.
  2. Nothing wrong in that. If you see a pretty girl and feel inspired to make a change in your life then use that motivation to make actual change. In the end you are making positive changes for yourself. After your work is done, walk up to her and tell her that she inspired you to become who you are today ;)
     
  3. Yeah I don't think I'm going to tell her exactly that, just tell her that I got my shit together and want to take her out.

    But good advice, thanks. I just don't need to use her as sole motivation. I use myself now.
     
  4. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    Nothing wrong with this. If I liked someone, I would do the same.
     
  5. I get inspired a lot like this, there was this gorgeous worker at the Whole Foods store and it made me want to be pmo free so bad.
     
  6. Awedouble

    Awedouble Fapstronaut

    Just remember it is an extrinsic motivation, intrinsic motivations are better - they've done studies to that effect I believe Dan Pink has a TED talk on it. That said it can be ONE motivation, as pointed out at least it is not virtual - but here I have to point out the aspiration of going out with her can easily start getting into fantasy territory, be aware of what your mind is doing.

    Also what people don't seem to ever look at is why a certain thing motivates you, and where the hell did you get the power to do what you did when you ARE motivated? Not knowing anything about an attractive female, it is likely just biology. Maybe not exclusively but just for the sake of discussion lets go with that. The next part is what's interesting to me, because how you did it, even if it's by fantasy is the POWER OF YOUR MIND. YOU made that shit happen! Even if it's just imagining the possibility, that's something your mind did. THAT is not extrinsic even if it started there. We would do well to keep that in mind.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.

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