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Finally going to visit an escort

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by BetaToAlpha, Feb 26, 2017.

  1. Got visited by just 18 people on hotornot, only one girl of those liked me. No PMs, and mine usually got ignored. That was the sign I was waiting. No matches on Tinder either and I registered yesterday.

    I posted my photos on some forum and while they told me I am attractive no one bothered to send me a PM. I guess love for a female is a way to exercise power over a man but no one wants even to manipulate me.

    Gonna start visiting prostitutes, I guess fate decided I don't deserve a normal relationship with a female. Having a wet dream after using Tinder is loserish. I give up after 16 years of doing anything to get a GF. Not gonna become a wizard. It's still better than crying myself to sleep and wanking. :)

    I give up the quest for love. I desperately need intimacy with a female and I'm gonna get it.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 26, 2017
  2. Don't do it. I have visited escorts in the past and suffered from sex addiction as a result. It's incredibly addictive and expensive.

    Approach girls in real life where you can get your personality across. They're less visual than we are.
     
  3. Uh, I'm fed up with that. Let's be realistic here - if I couldn't find a gf till now apparently I will not find one any time soon. I guess my personality is low value or boring. GFs also require investment and I don't think I can do the whole love thing any time soon. Before settling down with the one desperate enough to be with me I have the right to get some fun. I got a problem - I need intimacy and that's the only solution. Perhaps when I see women are not to be afraid of after sleeping with the escort, I'll be able to do the first step. I just can't do it for now and arranging sex is easier and more efficient, no fake/insincere compliments, it comes naturally for me to negotiate. :)
     
    Matrix Intel likes this.
  4. Good luck to that but escorts are the same substitues for GFs as P and M is substitute for sex.
    It's not the solution. But go and learn your lesson. You would be wiser after this.
     
  5. Bullshit you need a kick in your ass. Be better than that, I believe in you
     
  6. I think there's more social stigma on a man being a virgin than hiring a prostitute. We're damned if we do and damned if we don't, though. Don't pay for it, stay a virgin, and have almost every woman you date think you're a loser. Pay for it, and look like a skeezy loser because you had to pay for it.

    And I cannot date as I always wait for them to approach me. I can't approach the ones I like. Maybe if I do the deed with a hot escort I'll let go of the approaching dread I feel.

    I should also note that whenever this subject comes up, you get a few female commenters, telling the guy not to hire a hooker. It's usually pretty obvious that they don't have any idea what men are going through, and assume I can easily find a girl to take my virginity at a later time.
     
  7. bigbuford

    bigbuford Guest

    Bruh realize this: you do not want to change but you want the world around you to change tho. That is not the way it works. The PMO you and the escort you will be the same type person, selfish, sick, and manipulative. I say that knowing I am the same way every time I go back to those things I claim to hate. I ain't too far from how you feel right now, but sometimes when we think we need intimacy we ourselves just need change. C'mon man, don't resign yourself to see prostitutes, you will regret it as have I in the end.
     
  8. Mankrik

    Mankrik Fapstronaut

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    You need confidence and determination. You said you have tried everything, you have tried everything except what fucking works. Getting an escort is not the answer. Pursuing girls confidently with pure and honest intentions will solve your problem. Seeing an escort is a step in the wrong direction.
     
  9. All the ones I've ever approached were not interested. I'm almost 29, many guys my age already have children. Being intimate with a sexy escort will make me more confident like "I've fucked women hotter than her, so I don't need her validation". Also to me approaching is an act of begging for sex, and giving her the power to reject me. A hooker will never reject a handsome 8/10 guy like me just because he's shy and lacks confidence as she's getting paid. I have great looks and a warm heart and I'm better than most guys, yet it seem girls only care about social value.

    Besides what if I wait for Her and I marry her right away, how will I perform in bed when I have no prior experience?
     
    Ragnar_Lothbrok and SyrusDrake like this.
  10. Stop waiting and start acting. Man is measured upon his action, not upon his looks.

    Again, its up to you to improve yourself and change your mentality about this.
    Face your difficulties instead of running away from them.
    Visiting escort will not change anything.
     
  11. Well judging by women online even when I approach them they either seem too self-absorbed where they never show interest in me or outright crazy. I'm not one to only give and get no interest back. I would ask about them and they wouldn't ask anything about me. I'd rather see an escort than one of these women on dating sites. 95% of them suck as people. The ones I meet in real life friend zone me.
     
  12. Mankrik

    Mankrik Fapstronaut

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    Thats the easy way out and your only going to feel hollow inside. Dont worry about your age or other people's lives. Approaching just means you like them and want to get to know them better which when done face to face, is very respectable in this day and age. Women should let you down easy too if they are not interested and its no big deal. My advice is work on trying to meet someone without worrying about sex or being intimate at first. Just get to know them and enjoy spending time with them in a mutual way. It seems like your minds made up and thats your perogative, but finding someone you really care about to have sex with will be so much more rewarding and worth the effort. Its not too late.
     
    Citadelle and MontStar48 like this.
  13. JamesWarrior

    JamesWarrior Fapstronaut

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    I'm a guy, and I completely understand what you are going through. Trust me. But, paying a prostitute for sex really is not the answer and won't make you feel better about yourself. You'll do it and you'll still feel empty inside, you will still be YOU and a lot worse off, because now you'll be you with an even lower self-esteem and lower confidence. Paying a prostitute will mess you up mentally, if all you truly want is intimacy, you will feel violated and used. Understand, a prostitute does not care about you at all, they sell fake love, an illusion, and they take from you without remorse, you're just another fool to them, another bank - do you really want to give YOUR viriginity, YOURSELF to a woman that does not even respect or care about you? And then what will happen if down the line you do meet someone that becomes very important to you, how are you going to tell her that you threw away what you should have shared with her on a possibly STD/HIV infected user of a human being? Would you not then WISH you hadn't slept with a prostitute and just saved yourself for someone that actually matters?

    Listen, I understand your pain. It is lonely and things SEEM hopeless, but believe me that is just your current perception. You haven't tried everything, and maybe right now you are learning from and listening to all the wrong sources. Has a man ever told you that you don't NEED to be this ''alpha'' archetype? That it's all fake and bullshit? Has a man ever told you that you don't actually love yourself and that is why you feel so empty and broken inside? That is why you are so desperate for intimacy, because you lack intimacy with who you are. Self-love, my friend, that is the key. Learn how to love yourself by learning how to respect and care about yourself first, and things will happen. It takes times, everything takes time. Hang in there, don't give up.
     
  14. I see you have bad experiences with rejection, loneliness, lack of validation and love. Probably you are bored and lonely now ? But don't let your experiences and insecurities define your personality.
     
    RobbyGo36 and Potato93 like this.
  15. PostiveChange1974

    PostiveChange1974 Fapstronaut

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    I can see by your profile that you are a mature male. Unlike the rest here (while I still don't think your decision is wise), I won't try to talk you out of it. What I can do is try to prepare you for what you will experience. Hopefully this will make your decision a more informed one.

    (It's also important for me to say I've never been to a prostitute.) I do understand your feelings as I am also a male, and I was a virgin until 22 (and until that time I didn't know any women, and doubted any ever noticed me). I was so lonely, I wondered if it wouldn't be easier to be with a man. (Thankfully I never did that though). The closest I experience I have is a single one night stand after my exchange student GF went back home. I also dated a 'dancer' for two weeks (without being intimate with her), and finally watched a lot of documentaries about the trade). I'm also assuming that you will be in the united states, and no where near institutionalized prostitution, like in Nevada, or like the Red light district in Amsterdam.

    1. the person that shows up to your door (or who you go meet) will be a person. Any idea you have about her resembling a porn star, or 'hotness'. You need to totally discard. People have flaws, fat, freckles, etc. A woman that has been working as an escort is going to have her share of these and then some, as it's a stressful job. Think less perky cuteness on facebook, and think more like your tired slightly overweight 38 year old female neighbor.

    2. Loosing your virginity isn't like the romance you see on TV. If you think it's going to be 'the little death' where there is a white light at the end of the tunnel kind of release, you would be wrong. With your PMO situation, it will be more likely to be a slow finish, with you asking 'was that it?'. Additionally, you would be highly un-smart if you did this without a condom, and sex with a condom is a whole other level of lack of sensation. Different people experience different things, but when others have said that it will be 'empty', this is because sex with a partner often takes time and knowledge of yourself before you can relax and find what works best. If you hadn't used PMO, then it might be different. Please just realize that the release you will experience will be nothing as grand as that. (Unlike PMO, you don't get a second, third, shot at going again to make it better.)

    3. There won't be much intimacy. My understanding is that you can request whatever you like. Perhaps you just want to cuddle with a human being. You might be able to do that. Just realize that she is in a hurry, in that she gets paid by the act, and you mostly likely won't be the first or last customer of the day. With that, you may be able to get that person to sit with you, but she isn't going to be enthusiastic, relaxed, or interested in you. You will just be a timeslot she had to fill to feed her kids, and pay her rent. (Most likely she will be on her phone texting most of the time, booking the next thing, or answering customers). (Again I've never been with an escort, but my understanding is that your likely to be paying for particular sex acts, which they assume will take between 30mintes to an hour, which she would be happy if she can get down to 15 minutes so she can see another customer).

    4. While prostitution is a on-going trade going back to forever, be aware that if you aren't in a institutionalized area, the person that you go to meet (or shows up to you), can be a Police officer, or a criminal. Again, I have no idea of what the odds are. In some cases it might be as rare as you getting struck by lightening, but then again, how bad does it hurt when you do get struck? In the case of Police officers, legal procedures vary from place to place, but it often involves arrest, fine, and possible registration of your name on a public list of offenders. In the case of criminals anything is possible from you can being robbed for valuables (your wallet, phone, watch), or blackmailed by a female saying she will claim you raped her (so that you empty your bank account). In short, beyond normal risk for Std's, there is a situational risk to letting random strangers into your life.

    5. I don't know if you wrestle with the issues of society or not.... but the person you are hiring may (most likely) be a product of differing kinds of abuse. Many of the women that look 'fresh' in the trade are in fact underage (by a lot). Unfortunately, in this day and age, human trafficking is not only real, its actually common. This ranges from a young female manipulated by a 'boyfriend' who then turns out to be a pimp, to the situation of women captured off the street somewhere or across the boarder, and now are threatened with their lives, the lives of their family. (My god daughter was nearly abducted by men like this, but managed to struggle to get away). In short, if you worry about what is right and wrong in the world, you are very likely going to be tapping into a pool of people that have seen the worst of what is 'wrong' in the world.
     
  16. "Just get to know them and enjoy spending time with them in a mutual way."
    And end in the friend zone like always? I don't want any females in my life that are just platonic friends.

    "a prostitute does not care about you at all"
    So? She's gonna let me hold her and caress her. Also maybe suck her nipples. And hold her feminine body in my arms. That's all I want really. Even penetration is not that important to me. Last time a girl was into me was in grade 6, now I attract gay and bi guys and older, fat women at best.

    Some of us are just unlucky in love or have bad past life karma. Having not even a non sexual relationship with a gf from age 13 to 29 is abnormal. Oh and 22 is much better than 29. And how are you sure non prostitutes are clean?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 26, 2017
    SyrusDrake likes this.
  17. You do have a say in the matter you know. You will only be with someone of that description if you want to. I sympathise with some of your issues but some of your logic is mind-boggling.

    Anyway, it sounds like you've made up your mind. Give it to her good.
     
  18. m_brando

    m_brando Guest

    Yep here I am!

    You keep saying intimacy but whore sex is not intimacy, even the GFE fake intimacy they sell.

    No one "needs" intercourse to survive. It's not an element essential to an individual human's existence. Watch the Terry Crewes videos again where he talks about this in regards to entitlement. You feel entitled to use a woman's body, that's what this is about.

    Yep, here I am! Sorry to break it to you, but you men aren't dogs who just can't help themselves humping a leg!
    Watch the Terry Crewes videos where he talks about self-control. Pull yourself out of the gutter man, tricking is worse than P!

    YOU ARE MO'ing WITH A HUMAN BODY. SO IT COUNTS AS RELAPSE.
     
  19. I know you'll all disagree with me but personally I think he should go and fuck the prostitute to break his virginity. I think for a make anxiety builds if you haven't ever been laid.

    As long as you don't confuse it for love then I see how big issue.

    Regards women in general though... my advice is to stop feeling resentful. Negative attitudes regardless of merit get picked up.

    You need to start believing in yourself.
    If it's not going well then there are questions you need to ask yourself?... am I trying to pull suitable women?, am I looking in the right places?, do I project myself well and if not how can we improve it?, if your format is online dating then is your profile snappy enough? Does it have enough sass? Does it seem desperate?

    The list of questions goes on. There is a way here but it involves recognising all issues and formulating a plan.
     
  20. C'mon man you control your destiny. Not the planets. Part of your problem is you believe stuff like this and not enough in yourself.
     

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