Finding meaning/emotions

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by les_625, Dec 10, 2018.

  1. les_625

    les_625 Fapstronaut

    I was wondering if any of you guys have found emotion/meaning after dealing with PMO or anxiety/depression. I have been on an antidepressant since 14 (I started PMO when I was 11), and as life has progressed, I have lost emotions or passion for anything. I am just complacent, I have come to think as you get older, you lose all of your emotions/passion/motivation/meaning. Is life like this for everyone? I just want to find emotion and meaning again. I think I will quit my antidepressant with my doctor because I think it has contributing to dulling my life. Do any of the older folks here find that passion/purpose/emotions/ comes back with time? I am tired of feeling listless and apathetic. I am tired of feeling like the world is covered by a grey fog. I wish life had the same meaning and purpose it used to. I feel okay and stable right now, it just would be nice to have some color to life. I want to feel the feelings I used to around family/friends/loved ones. I want to find purpose other than trying to convince myself what my purpose is. I want to actually feel it as well. I want to feel love towards my girlfriend, not have to convince myself I want to be with her.

    Thank you all.
    sakeen and SLeepisLost like this.
  2. Seamless122

    Seamless122 Fapstronaut

    What i found out, this being my 4th time having a long streak is that i now think of girls in another way. Basically before any girl i would speak to i wanted to have sexual relationships with them. Now, after this 40 ish day streak i found myself, besides the withdrawals which at some point were terrible, finding the meaning of love and feelings towards someone. Now for example i really care about girls that i didnt want more with that just plain sex. I still have a lot to learn since girls have been absent in my life cause of my lack of confidence and other effects porn has on your body, but i believe WE ALL are on the right track here.

    As for depression, imo when you`re rebooting depression will come and go and at times it will be really hard to deal with but keep in mind your goals and never relapse, a few seconds of pleasure arent worth it for the effect it has.
    Also, I used to design things in photoshop back in the day (a few years ago) and ever since i started rebooting seriously (streaks of 20-80 days) i have found that i have a lot more interest in developing my skills in something and my desire to learn things is also higher now.
    For example i have seen a video of a few people shuffle dancing and also DnB step and skank dancing and i have started to learn some steps!

    So keep going through the streak, it is well worth it!

    I dont really know if my answer is the best someone from this forum could offer you, but i thought that if i gave you a little insight of what the reboot process has done to me so far, you may benefit from it.
    les_625 likes this.
  3. les_625

    les_625 Fapstronaut

    Great to know. Thank you for the advice/input, it is encouraging!
  4. Pranav1486

    Pranav1486 Fapstronaut

    i have still tough time with emotions.. it is confusing for me if I ask myself one question:am I happy in this particular instant? I want to happy again very easily, like a child watching balloon :)
    day 82 no_pm.
    les_625 and sakeen like this.

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