[Finished] My Final Paper is on the Dangers of Porn

I wanted to show you guys the unfinished draft for my English final. The assignment was to write a 7 page essay covering an issue that needed awareness. We also have to create a 3 minute presentation to the class on our issue, which I'm pretty excited for. I like the way it's turning out so far, but the professor said I need more life stories and content that touches the audience's emotion, so I was wondering if you guys had some pointers. I like the argument that I set up, but people don't always listen to facts, so I need some stories, mostly of what the danger in the porn industry is. I also need to interview someone, so maybe one of you guys could give some insight. I'll post the final essay when I finish, and I'm super excited to get some feedback.

EDIT: The pdf linked here is the finished product I submitted. I really like how it turned out. Thanks everyone!

 

I revised the file in the OP. Please tell me what you think guys! This project is actually a big part of what is motivating me during this streak.

 

Unfortunately, this paper is due next Thursday, so I don't have much time to collaborate with everyone. Although I wasn't gonna write about masturbation that much, I think a Fapstronaut's story seems like a good way to fulfill the interview requirement, and touch on the issue of how porn effects the viewer in a more personal way. If any of you would like to PM me a short paragraph or a few sentences about how porn negatively impacted you, or point me to a journal with something you are OK with me quoting, I'd love to include it in my paper.

Some more minor edits to the essay in the OP. Thanks so much for replying guys!

 

Fixed some issues, thanks. I think most people think of the internet as beneficial, but are unaware of some of the bad things. I will add a sentence talking about that, your right. I'm a freshman in college, and this is a pretty basic English class that I need as a requirement. I was pretty nervous about choosing this topic, but part of actualizing myself is choosing what is important to me over what other people think, so I chose this topic because I care about it and I don't care if people think it's weird. I didn't really write about how I dealt with these issues personally, but I wanted to keep it more research oriented and less like a diary. I've never really talked to anyone about NoFap either, but this essay is a way of indirectly doing that. Do you think people will connect the dots that this is an issue I have dealt with? Hopefully this open other people's eyes as well!

 

I hope the boys don't blow it off! We were doing peer reviewing in class and I had to read one of my earlier drafts to two girls, and you're, right they both said it was really interesting! I guess girls like hearing about sex and stuff haha. Being with freshman, I think this topic will catch many people off guard and get their attention, which is what I'm trying to do.

 

Interesting to get a woman's perspective. My professor is also a woman, and I was afraid she would not understand what the topic means to me as a man, but I guess the challenge of writing is to represent feelings in a way that everyone can understand them. I experienced some complications from PMO, though not PIED or relationship problems (I guess not having any is a problem) but porn still seems problematic to me for the harm it causes others, and I want to convey a sense of duty in others to stop supporting such a horrible industry.

 

I think most people assume that others watch porn, at least I do. So when they see me promoting awareness about this issue then it will kind of imply that I don't PMO, at least not anymore. Plus look at that 7 day badge! It's gonna get a lot higher if I can internalize my goals and overcome this issue. Part of overcoming PMO is accepting it as an issue, which I aim to do in this essay and by expressing my issues with porn. I'm not directly talking about my PMO issue in the essay either. From a humanistic stance, there are many things wrong with porn, which is what half the essay is about.