Flashbacks still haunting me... I'm seriously busted out crying

S

saddist_adult

Fapstronaut
I remembered the girl masturbating, twerking incident people on this site said it's not relapse and huge slipped up... i entirely forgot about lesbian kissing... it was porn lesbian dirty kissing... their mouth was watery like cum, sucking each other tongue and everything... it was the stupidest idea, i have ever done... Luckily i didn't see the whole nude due to YouTube policy's it's cropped the nudity part. only displayed their facial expressions.

I'm not sure back then whether it was full blown relapse... I'm mental exhaustion from doubts and fears... Please help, was it a relapse?
 
If you actively sought out P and it wasn't accidental, or you watched for more than 1 second after realizing what's on the screen than that's a soft relapse. If you engaged in M, but stopped before the big O, that's a moderate relapse, and if you did all 3 PMO, that's the hard reset right there. The thing is, you cannot fool the brain. It is programmed to know what it knows. If you feed it the fuel it's seeking, you strengthen the neuro pathways and the addiction owns you. If you absolutely remove this filth from your life, things will improve all around and you'll feel better emotionally, physically and spiritually. It's all true
 
saddist_adult said:
I remembered the girl masturbating, twerking incident people on this site said it's not relapse and huge slipped up... i entirely forgot about lesbian kissing... it was porn lesbian dirty kissing... their mouth was watery like cum, sucking each other tongue and everything... it was the stupidest idea, i have ever done... Luckily i didn't see the whole nude due to YouTube policy's it's cropped the nudity part. only displayed their facial expressions.

I'm not sure back then whether it was full blown relapse... I'm mental exhaustion from doubts and fears... Please help, was it a relapse?
Click to expand...
A relapse of course
 
Overforme said:
If you actively sought out P and it wasn't accidental, or you watched for more than 1 second after realizing what's on the screen than that's a soft relapse. If you engaged in M, but stopped before the big O, that's a moderate relapse, and if you did all 3 PMO, that's the hard reset right there. The thing is, you cannot fool the brain. It is programmed to know what it knows. If you feed it the fuel it's seeking, you strengthen the neuro pathways and the addiction owns you. If you absolutely remove this filth from your life, things will improve all around and you'll feel better emotionally, physically and spiritually. It's all true
Click to expand...
It was intentionally... Clearly in the post i mentioned, also it wasn't terribly cause YouTube policy's cropped the nudity parts basically i only see their faces... I spent nearly watching those stuffs, people told me it's probably a huge slipped up... I'm not sure what u think in this case, I'm kinda messed up in the head now
 
Just keep moving forward on the right path and get away from the trash that is P. Give your brain positive outlets to rush the dopamine. Go for a nice run. Cook and eat healthy meals. Make sure you're getting good sleep. Meditate. Swim. Lift weights. Stretch. Do whatever that makes you escape from the evil that's porn. Look how it's made you feel. It's bad stuff. I need a big reminder every now and again as well
 
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