Flatline. ..please help

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by ario_80, Mar 25, 2016.

  1. ario_80

    ario_80 Fapstronaut

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    Im 35 and married. I have come clean to my wife and after going through alot of pain and tears she is now fully supportive of my reboot.I have been in my reboot now for 9 months now. Clean off masturbation for over 6 months and completely off porn for over 60days cos I fell back a few times. Then my flat line hit me about 6 weeks ago. I have told my wife about it and she is being patient and supportive but now I'm really struggling because I want us to have sex and she does too but I'm not confident in my erection. My sex drive is so low too...and now I am really battling with the temptation of going back to porn briefly to arouse myself again and feed images into my head. I don't want to do it. I want to stay strong and also be completely connected and present when I make love to my wife.
    Please if you have any advice or have gone through this successfully, I am all ears. I need some support now from my no fab family. ...I'm all ears!
     
  2. ello_govna

    ello_govna Fapstronaut

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    I haven't experienced this particular situation, but I would say maybe try taking it slowly. Make a whole night of it, with a nice dinner and candles and maybe a massage. Foreplay might help you build up the arousal, and if not, you could focus on your wife's pleasure instead of having anxiety about PIV sex.
     
  3. Keep up the good work. Take pride in the change you're making, not many people are even willing to try. A flatline varies from person to person, but its best not to view it as a sign of weakness. A flatline is temporary, its just your brain adjusting to the lifestyle change. A flatline is like being in a tunnel and you can only go forwards or backwards, it may seem like it wont end but it will. The worst thing you could do is go to PMO again, because you'll just make quitting harder. Make things easy for yourself and hold on. @ello_govna good advice and really try to focus on whats going on in the moment not whats going on in your head. Being with an actual person who you love beats going to PMO any day in my book. Good luck!
     
    PrevCDM likes this.
  4. ario_80

    ario_80 Fapstronaut

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    Guys thanks so much for this. I really appreciate it. I will stay strong and it's so reassuring to know the flat line is temporary. It's also great advice I think to focus on the moment and on her pleasure if need be cos I think my anxiety just makes things worse.
     
    PrevCDM likes this.
  5. diamondboi

    diamondboi Banned

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    Have you ever considered testosterone replacement therapy?

    Erections are almost entirely based on testosterone from the quality, duration, and libido as a driving factor.

    I'm curious to why you are not able to satisfy your wife and could very well be hormone related. Most people are able to perform after a month of NoFap within a comfortable boundary, granted three months is usually the staple for full recovery for most.

    Based on your numbers you should have somewhat of a healthy sex drive, and functioning cock.
     
  6. PrevCDM

    PrevCDM Guest

    I have no experience here, but commend you for your dedication and congratulate you for such an incredible bond shared with your misses.

    Now keep at it, and don't look back. PMO was poison and you have health in front of you... The brain just needs time to heal. Are you exercising often? I would start incorporating in exercise four times a week. It helps with blood flow throughout the body, lowers fat, raises testosterone, and causes a lot of positive brain activity.
     
    someguy-21 likes this.
  7. zadvanceppa

    zadvanceppa Fapstronaut

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    The flatline period has no rule book. But it ends and often I find myself regretting its return. Its return to constant arousal feels good and invigorating but I tend to look around for releases. Must learn to control better. I love and hate the flatline periods. I jerked off too much. Constant nutrient depletion is wrong for my body and soul. The change is hard but worth the work.
     

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