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FREEDOM IS POSSIBLE - I AM THE PROOF

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by Todor, Mar 30, 2018.

  1. Obviously a big YES! Thank you once again for your valuable words and it made me to think about the positives more. Keep going Todor!
     
    Todor likes this.
  2. Shin Iu

    Shin Iu Fapstronaut

    I started masturbated like 13, watched porn 1st time in 16. I tried to quite it at 18 and failed. I am passed 24 now. I am not a big successor, and I failed my relationship in 2016. I also had issue with my parents before.
    But I want to face my past like you,
    and I want to love myself,
    and I want to love my family,
    and I want to love my country.
    I want to be as honest as you, even I am far from perfect.
    All I want to say is that I don't want you to give up. and I know my future self would not wish me to give up.
    Think like this way: will your future self want you to end here now (will he let you give up easily), because of some feelings for some reasons?
     
  3. CELIBACY_GUY

    CELIBACY_GUY Fapstronaut

    You are inspiration man !
     
  4. CELIBACY_GUY

    CELIBACY_GUY Fapstronaut

    just read your life experiences in one go and I am thankful to you for sharing your life experiences , as it can be of great help to novice and newbie like me . Though , I was not aware of of the ills of PMO but there was something which always compelled me to know the working mechanism behind it and it lead me to unravel the scientific cause of PMO .
    But after reading your experiences , it was more clear how life situations and circumstances sometime , lead and trickle us to adopt PMO as quick fix which have long term adverse impact . The reading gave me insight , how a parent can be proactive in carving and giving a great future to their children !
    Thank you ! for sharing , very few people are able to contemplate to such minutest details of life , you are just an example for the people around , I shall always be indebted to you for your sharing .

    Respect to you from the dept of my heart !
     
    Todor likes this.
  5. goodnice

    goodnice Fapstronaut

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    i relate bro i am sorry
     
  6. tidus

    tidus Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

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    Thank you for sharing with all of us your story. People who share the experiences/success in a large depth always grabs my attention to read. When I was reading about your childhood, I can feel the heaviness in your words because I was in a similar situation as you while growing up. I was reminded of all the pain and circumstances that happened when we were just kids and I felt like I was the only kid in the world going through this problem when it came to a broken family and PMO. My favorite part about the story was how you reflected back to the past and tried to understand what happened. Now everything is starting to make sense to me after I realize why my parents acted the way they did while growing up. There are so much in this thread that I can say were very helpful and I won't list everything but thank you so much for sharing once again. This post hit close to home. I will take what I've read from here close to heart and continue my journey to full recovery. I'm glad you were able to get out of all you have been through to help others like me.
     
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  7. goodnice

    goodnice Fapstronaut

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    Broken home and PMO are a linear graph. Abusive dads from what i've seen tend to lead to sons with addictions. Growing up, my dad always yelled and started fights every night and things were very bad. I have told myself "i'm never gonna be like my dad. I won't ever treat my wife or son that way." But unfortunately it's in my DNA and it's the way i was raised so it's ingrained in my thoughts and patterns, which means it will be extra hard for me to not act like him- that being said it isn't impossible and i will do my very best
     
    Todor likes this.
  8. khokhar

    khokhar Fapstronaut

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    bro, i must say it is possible.but for all of guys i want to share 1 thing which helps you to fight this diseases very well:hack book SPAM REMOVED (spam code #001) - REPORT TO MODERATION
     
  9. and i told my wife about my whole past while crying and then i felt light like a feather...and right now i am listening to songs in new delhi where i work as a teacher...beautiful night with beautiful weather....my laptop is on my table my fan is on...my mobile is on the talbe .....i love you and you and youuuuu
     
    Todor likes this.
  10. i really love your mom and dad
     
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  11. my dear sir,
    never beat your kid or wife....because they are godly they are heavenly they are pure and absolute they are beautiful they are nice .....love them kiss them hug them talk to them laugh with them play with them....walk with them jump with them .....eat with them.....just dance with themmmm.....love themmmm ....and thank god for giving them to u
     
    goodnice likes this.
  12. Keep on fighting

    Keep on fighting New Fapstronaut

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    Thank you man for sharing its very inspiring, the fact that i can relate to some of your experiences is very supportive to me.
    I really hope you the best.
     
    Last edited: Apr 28, 2018
    Todor likes this.
  13. Uphillfighter22

    Uphillfighter22 Fapstronaut

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    Thats awesome! I remembered telling my wife and my parents and felt soo much better. I had tears of shame but I also felt free! The best part is they did not judge. They were all supportive. You have an awesome story bro, hope to see more of your progress here! Peace!
     
    Todor likes this.
  14. thelyokotree

    thelyokotree Fapstronaut

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    really inspiring.
    Thank you for all your stories and recommendations.
    I am motivated to fight my own addiction and distraction.
    Thank you. I dont just do not know what to say.
     
    Todor likes this.
  15. UPDATE: Dear fellows, today is a new beginning for me as I broke my promise to myself and MO yesterday after 126 days of no PMO.

    It is important to emphasize that I did not relapse due to urge to watch P and MO, but due to my own thoughts, which I've been giving a lot of energy lately. At the moment, after 4 months of no PMO I have no urges to watch P anymore, so I feel a big relief I am free from the P addiction.

    But I still have a lot of work to do, because I am not a total master of my mind yet. It is still tempting me and I can say that the P from the screen has become a P in my head; in my imagination. It will take more time to get fully free from my own thoughts and imaginations that I feed myself alone.

    Regardless of the reset, I am optimistic about my future, because I know I'm going in the right direction - the only possible future for me is total freedom from anything that enslaves me. Along the way there are pitfalls and it is possible to fall down, but I'm rising up again and I'm moving forward, with better understanding of myself and the causes of my relapse.

    -----------
    Here are a few things that I learned worth mentioning:

    THINGS I DIDN'T DO, which I had to:
    - In the last month I gave up my breathing practice, because I didn't feel it is so needed anymore. I overlooked the importance it plays in my life and I see the obvious consequences from that now.
    - I didn't stick to my 'New Definition of Sexuality', which is my guidance how to use my sexual energy.

    THINGS I DID, which I hadn't have to:
    - I allowed my thoughts and speculations about sexual pleasures to appear in my mind and I not only gave them space to be, but I fueled them consciously - that was a big mistake, because it brought me closer to the moment of O.
    - The conversations I lead with other members on the forum triggered the biggest urges from my teenage years, which in the course of the last month created too much tension in my mind. The thoughts were so strong that they went into my dreams and further influenced my experiences during the day.


    THE MIND DOES NOT KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN WHAT IT SEES ON THE SCREEN, IN REAL LIFE OR INSIDE THE HEAD AS IMAGINATION. So basically, even though I quit P, I could still create/imagine such stuff that I've been conditioned for 20 years to watch. It is my job to be the self-regulator and to be the one that decide which thought is allowed to be fed/fueled and which needs to be deprived from energy. This self-regulation in my case becomes available only if I am present to the situation I'm in; if I'm in the now (as Eckhart Tolle describes it).

    WHEN THE NO PMO ROAD IS TAKEN THE MIND USES ALL POSSIBLE WAYS TO BRING YOU BACK TO THE OLD HABIT/ADDICTION. There is a point just before the brain gets rewired from the old patterns when it becomes really aggressive and pushy to keep the old stuff. It is cruel and does not care what will happen in the long term. All it cares for is to keep the stuff that makes it get the shot. It takes more than 90 days (in my case more than 120 days) for a complete reboot. In the end of the reboot came what was the first thing/thought/event that got me hooked to P/MO. It is also the most embarrassing, shameful, alluring. It's a real fight and there is only one winner - either the old or the new self. The old represents everything I used to be; the new - everything I want to be. Past and future are in a collision and I am the consciousness that decided which way to go - repeat the old or move on with the new.

    I HAVE SELF ACCEPTANCE NOW. Even though I did something I didn't think I'll ever do again, I am not punishing myself or becoming depressive about what happened. I just understand I need to be more diligent in my self-leadership and trust that everything will be okay in the end.

    ---------

    I am now confidently continuing ahead, starting from Day 0 and aiming for 8 months of rewiring (until the end of 2018). Then I will reevaluate and continue my journey with only one goal - a freedom for a lifetime.

    Love,
    Todor
     
  16. DDD78

    DDD78 New Fapstronaut

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    Hi
    I just wanted to say thankyou for sharing your story. I downloaded the PDF and took time over 3 days to read it all properly from start to finish and there is so much in there I identify with. I'm at the stage where I don't have an addiction to P but I do to Cam Chat Rooms and if I can shut that down, I will be free. I found your ideas around breathing inspiring as well as contemplating and next time I get the urge to PMO I am going to do my utmost to try and stay strong, deal with the pain and resist the urge by removing myself from the situation and practice the breathing techniques you talked about. I wish you all the best
     
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  17. This is big. A reset with no porn is much less damaging.

    It would be better if no porn fantasy was involved, but we fight as ee can.
     
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  18. Dunstanfox

    Dunstanfox Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for posting this! This is a fantastic, encouraging resource! I am glad that you had such a powerful moment of transformation and self-acceptance and that it allowed you to overcome your PMO addiction. Your story is encouraging and motivating, partially because I too have resorted to PMO out of questions about my sexuality. I am accepting myself though, and your story helps. I can live the rest of my life porn-free if I develop the right habits today (i.e. total commitment to no touching and reliance on urge surfing). Stay strong!
     
    Todor likes this.
  19. GratifiedSlave

    GratifiedSlave Fapstronaut

  20. I read your story entirely. Amazing.
    I am taking inspiration...especially the advice just to stay with the discomfort and not to medicate with PMO.
    THANKS!
     
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