Future Doc's Day 1

Doc1368

Fapstronaut
Hey all

a little bit about myself: I am a recently engineering graduate who is currently working on my medical school application and taking a few graduate level classes in order to boost my application. I discovered masturbating when I was 12 or 13 and I have been masturbating constantly ever since. The reason why I have decided to give up masturbation is not based on moral or religious reasons but because I simply waste hours during the day searching/watching porn. This time can be well spent on my school work or on getting my application done. I've also been in a 5 year relationship with my girlfriend and I know for a fact that masturbation has greatly affected our sex life. Most of the time, I much rather watch my porn and jerk off than to have sex with a real person who is in front of me and wants to sleep with me. This cannot go on any longer.

My initial plan was to give up all PMO for two weeks. but now I have decided to give up PMO for a whole month! I also plan on learning as much as I can about the physiological/chemical aspects of Porn and masturbation addiction. (or any addiction really, I hear they are all pretty much the same in the brain on the molecular level) Anyways I am looking forward to being an active member of NoFap and helping myself and others reach whatever goals they have in life.

TheDoc
 
Day 2-

My Day two went by with relative ease. I have an exam coming up this week which has keep me busing studying. I know for a fact that keeping occupied and not allowing your self to get bored alone makes all the difference in the world when your trying not to Fap. I've also started watching a great youtube channel made by Mark Queppet. (Here is a link: http://www.youtube.com/user/SacredSexualityVlog?feature=watch) For those of you that might get bored browsing online and end up on the porn website this is a good alternative to have! I also installed the K9 Password protected filtering software which blocks all the porn websites from my browser. Being only on my second day of NoFap I have not needed it yet but it never hurts to have that filter just in case I get that desperate down the road. That being said I strongly believe that it should be my choice to not watch porn and avoid relapse rather than a software making that decision for me! Anyways I hope this info helps whoever is interested in reading what I have to say. It definitely helps me to write my thoughts down and stay on my course of no fapping for 30 days.
 
Day 2-

My Day two went by with relative ease. I have an exam coming up this week which has keep me busing studying. I know for a fact that keeping occupied and not allowing your self to get bored alone makes all the difference in the world when your trying not to Fap. I've also started watching a great youtube channel made by Mark Queppet. (Here is a link: http://www.youtube.com/user/SacredSexualityVlog?feature=watch) For those of you that might get bored browsing online and end up on the porn website this is a good alternative to have! I also installed a K9 Password protected software which is free by the way. It blocks all the porn websites from your browser. I have not really needed it so far being on my day 2 but it never hurts to have that filter just in case I get that desperate down the road. That being said I strongly believe that it should be my choice to not watch porn and avoid relapse rather than a software making that decision for me! Anyways I hope this info helps whoever is interested in reading what I have to say. It definitely helps me to write my thoughts down and stay on my course of no fapping for 30 days.
 
Day 2-

My Day two went by with relative ease. I have an exam coming up this week which has keep me busing studying. I know for a fact that keeping occupied and not allowing your self to get bored alone makes all the difference in the world when your trying not to Fap. I've also started watching a great youtube channel made by Mark Queppet. (Here is a link: http://www.youtube.com/user/SacredSexualityVlog?feature=watch) For those of you that might get bored browsing online and end up on the porn website this is a good alternative to have! I also installed a K9 Password protected software which is free by the way. It blocks all the porn websites from your browser. I have not really needed it so far being on my day 2 but it never hurts to have that filter just in case I get that desperate down the road. That being said I strongly believe that it should be my choice to not watch porn and avoid relapse rather than a software making that decision for me! Anyways I hope this info helps whoever is interested in reading what I have to say. It definitely helps me to write my thoughts down and stay on my course of no fapping for 30 days.
 
Day 4-

So I have my exam tomorrow and I feel very anxious. I also decided to apply to med school during this cycle which means I have until october first to turn my app in. Thus, I am currently freaking out. I am very anxious and for the first time in 4 days I'm having a bit of an urge to FAP. BUT NO!!!! I will not. I will not run away from this anxiety to feel shame and guilt after fapping. After all even if I fap.. my test will still be tomorrow and I will still have a month to apply which means it is time to man up and face the challenges of my life. Time to face the anxiety and pressure! I am in control of my life and I am in control of my actions. Wish me luck!

The doc
 
Holy shit. Ended up on a porn website tonight. I was drinking with some friends, came home and BAM on a porn website. I probably spent 5 min on there but ended up closing out and not touching myself which is a good thing. I cant believe I came so close.

Two things I learned:
1- being tipsy and alone is to be avoided from now on.
2- Thinking about the guilt and shame I would feel tomorrow morning when I would know I had failed myself and lost to my habit was the only thing that pulled me back from the urge and made me stop.

I cannot fail this challenge. I will not!!
 
Ok I failed. I have to admit I had been really horny for the past 24 hours and i finally lost the battle but I have not lost the war. This was the first time in my life since discovered porn that I was able to not look at porn for 5 days. Kinda sad now that I think about it. One would think 5 days would not be so hard. I am going to decrease my plan of 30 days to a more achievable 14 days and slowly work my way up to the ultimate 90 day challenge. Wish me luck!

the Doc
 
Hey Dogwood thanks for asking man. The exam went well. Thanks for the link as well. I must admit I agree with alot of it. During the 5 days of no fapping I was more concentrated on my school work, focused and driven than I have ever been. I barely browsed the web wasting time and my self confidence was through the roof. I also had alot of energy during the day even though I was averaging 4 hours of sleep per night. Today however is a different story, I cannot focus and I feel very tired and dont feel like doing anything. All of which make me want to jump back into my NoFap routine and get my mojo back!

The doc
 
Hello Doc. Your past experience and problems read similar to mine. Good luck in trying to over come it. Write to me if you ever want any support.
 
Thanks Dance. Im just currently taking baby steps after my relapse last week. Good luck with your challenge as well!
 
Oh boy, Here we go.

Relapsed again! this is the second time that I relapse on Day 6!! I think what I did wrong this time around is that I stopped visiting this blog and writing my daily reports. I guess it really helps coming here everyday and writing to you guys. It helps me stay on track more. For now I will try to avoid binging tonight and From tomorrow I will write a report everyday. If anyone else out there has a relapse problem after one week or so would love to here what your trying to do in order to avoid relapse.
 
One last thing, If anyone else is taking up the 7 or 14 day challenge and wants to partner up with me to keep each other on track just let me know. Thanks
 
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