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Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by derivative, Nov 24, 2018.
Are you on easy mode or hardmode?
I've been schooled pretty hard on not assuming intention. The story had to do with the time I almost asked a girl out, but that's a story for another time. Never assume intentions as you never really know somebody else's true intentions. However, generally speaking, more people than not DON'T want to hurt other people's feelings. Also, nobody is entirely evil or pristinely good. We all fall on a varying spectrum.
Calling him a "virgin" and purposely telling getting him to look at a nude scene by lying is not teasing, it's bloody douchebaggery disguised as a joke and they're obviously the type of people that get a kick out of tormenting someone.
If they can't see its bothering him which should be bloody easy for how he's acting and the comments he makes, then they're just daft and gormless. Folks always say something is just a prank or joke when in reality they're just cruel and it's neither of those, or they could be decent people.
Well, I, the OP, have not confronted anybody, but that is because scenarious usally de-escalate pretty quickly so dragging the scenario out would make stuff worse.
I don't want anybody to think that I think I'm the good guy and whatnot. Because I don't think that there is necessarily a good and bad group here. I'm just being me, an observant human being who is fascinated by social behavior and was wondering if anybody else had gone through this and more importantly if anybody had a solution. If I were not looking for a solution, I would just be bitching. But I am a civilized human looking for a solution, which means I am trying to problem-solve, not trying to bitch about my problems. I'm hoping that this discussion will also help other people who may be going through something similar. Please remember the positive intention as we discuss in this thread
I can understand what you're feeling, I think it takes guts to go outside the status quo. These scenarios are pretty common. When I turned vegan I get bashed on but I'm now observing what I had done in the past, eat meat. I went on with it and kept at it. Now people are just letting me be. Sometimes, they still badger me. I think keeping at it, through mentality helped be get through those times. Trying to explain sometimes might have helped but other times the culture that has been ingrained in people's heads is so stuck that they have no space for other options. Good luck to you in your journey.
Dang I never realized that vegan converts get a similar treatment. Except vegans get it far more to my understanding, because talking about vegan shit does not necessarily make for as awkward of the conversation as porn and jacking off. Therefore vegans are an easy target. Hit with an insult, run away, swoop back again, gone, repeat. Stay tough!
Haha right? Although I don't typically talk about vegan shit anymore. I've seen that blow over with too many people too many times. I end up just eating not meat, and then people end up reacting by my behaviors or bring up that I'm vegan. It's kind of like my family which seems to annoy me. They bring it up like I'm a sort of trophy but I'd rather it stay on the DL and then just me eat in peace. I don't want other people to cause a ruckus or anything.
If they could just stay low-key and not make a big deal about veganism, things would be far easier. It's kinda like dealing with a severe food allergy in a restaurant or group setting. You don't WANT the attention, but if you're gonna not die, you would have to tell people what your needs are. Perhaps borderline oxymoronic.
regarding dogs, I was bitten when I was little and I have fear/hate towards dogs but mostly because of my past experience and it is something that
forms from experiences.
This is why I said we live in Wanker nation. People think you're weird because you don't wank and do it often. I say their standards are just bottom barrel, like most of society.
I mean yeah in a sense, I have to know if it's in the food. It's a give and take.
Going vegan is pretty hard so I applaud you
Thank you, appreciate it. It takes willpower but you get used to it.
I wouldn't. It's one thing to go around making a show of your abstainence or throw it in peoples faces for the sake of being high and mighty but based on his post, he's getting made fun of for not just going along with the crowd. Their own destructive behavior is whats making them feel bad. Should he take a hit of meth and bang a hooker with no rubber to make everyone feel comfortable? Why cant they just enjoy their porn and let the op abstain in peace?
I might quote you some day
I completely agree with you......now there is vulgarity even in the name of comedy......
I am from India.....and comedians here jokes too much about the wedding night.....
It's uncomfortable sometimes specially when parents are around........
Even advertisement are filled with this thinking.......
As for me......I have made a rule for myself that I don't look at women's body parts except their face......this strategy has helped me........so I survive those unnecessary sexual scenes
Then you should follow your instinct......
Hard mode is difficult but more beneficial
What does this have to do with anything?
Amen. Dont let anyone make you feel bad for doing the right thing or what is best and healthiest for you. You shouldnt have to compromise your morals to make someone else comfortable or to not be made fun of, and if you're feeling the need to do that, then either you need to work on your own self confidence, or you need some more supportive friends. Or maybe both.
I don't understand that either, even originally that "hating dogs" statement made no sense as there's zero correlation between that and what OP has said.