Girlfriend went away and now I'm back in flatline

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Gavalar09, Oct 30, 2021.

  1. Gavalar09

    Gavalar09 Fapstronaut

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    Basically, we were having normal sex, everything was back to normal for me. Good libido, good erections, just no morning wood.

    The day she went away, my dick went completely dead. As if I'd gone back into flatline? Is this something that can happen?

    Its like my brain rewired to sex but when she went, flatline and no dopamine. I'm extremely worried and confused by this.

    Has this happened to anyone before?
     
  2. Gavalar09

    Gavalar09 Fapstronaut

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    Really hope someone can help with this as I'm so confused and worried.
     
  3. Candun

    Candun Fapstronaut

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    Are you "back in the flatline" or just feeling shitty for the time being since your girlfriend is gone?
     
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  4. Gavalar09

    Gavalar09 Fapstronaut

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    It feels like a flatline. Numb penis, no morning wood etc
     
  5. Candun

    Candun Fapstronaut

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    Honestly I'd say just wait a little while and carry on as normal. Not being hard for a few days won't harm you
     
  6. Gavalar09

    Gavalar09 Fapstronaut

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    Yes
    Yes but my libido has completely gone too
     
  7. Honestly why do you need a libido if your girlfriend is not around? You're committing no crime.
     
  8. Gavalar09

    Gavalar09 Fapstronaut

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    But surely I should be horny like normal. My libido and dick shouldn't just die because she leaves for a week.
     
  9. 1998nsgjr

    1998nsgjr Fapstronaut

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    Friend you need sexual skins to be horny and not horny every moment
     
  10. Gavalar09

    Gavalar09 Fapstronaut

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    But to not have morning wood again, no libido, feel weak, it all just feels very off.
     
  11. 1998nsgjr

    1998nsgjr Fapstronaut

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    Friend I think orgasm if the girlfriend brought you back to the flat line not that she went Gray spoke to the fact that he said that orgasms return to the flat line Give yourself more time dude not rush to sex
     
  12. 1998nsgjr

    1998nsgjr Fapstronaut

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    חבר אני חושב שאורגזמה אם החברה החזירה אותך לקו השטוח לא שהיא הלכה גריי דיבר על זה שהוא אמר שאורגזמות חוזרות לקו השטוח תן לעצמך עוד זמן אחי אל תמהר לסקס
     
  13. Gavalar09

    Gavalar09 Fapstronaut

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    So I managed to have sex on 5mg of cailis. Worked well. I don't get why I don't have a libido or erections without my girlfriend there.
     
  14. modernstore99

    modernstore99 Fapstronaut

    Haha this is pretty normal dude. Your brain lost its source of arousal, so it's not getting aroused! Perfectly fine, it will come back when she comes back. Take this time to focus on your work and relax, you'll be up and running as soon as she's back
     
  15. Gavalar09

    Gavalar09 Fapstronaut

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    But I thought you could just have a normal libido.
    So I have to wait until she's around?
    What about the morning wood?
     
  16. modernstore99

    modernstore99 Fapstronaut

    Feeling aroused and thinking about sex only when your partner is around absolutely falls under the category of "normal libido"! Porn and society program us to think that men should be horndogs that think about sex all the time and are ready for sex every second of the day. That is just totally false haha, everyone has different levels of libido, but only getting aroused when your partner around is totally fine haha.

    I can see you are 28, so is it possible porn abuse hampered your libido a little bit? Absolutely. Remember that recovery happens gradually over a period of several years, not months or weeks; you seem healthy to me already, but getting back to 100% peak performance can take years.

    I used to be exactly the same when I was dating my first girlfriend after my first reboot; I would only get aroused around her, didn't think about sex or get erections any other time. Once we broke up and I started having sex with multiple women though, I started getting aroused by strangers again. Our brains were just conditioned to find arousal from our girlfriends lol; nothing wrong with that, but you either gotta teach your brain every girl is arousing or just let the recovery happen over time. Both are totally fine, don't rush it, you don't need to be getting horny for every girl you see to be "normal".

    Morning woods are nice, but not having them doesn't mean you're not recovered, especially at your age. Focus more on your performance and satisfaction with your partner, not some of these secondary symptoms. Connection and intimacy is the goal, not tentpoles in the morning haha
     
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  17. Gavalar09

    Gavalar09 Fapstronaut

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    I thought morning wood was the first sign of recovery though no?

    And that no morning wood shows there is a physical issue?
     
  18. modernstore99

    modernstore99 Fapstronaut

    It's a sign of recovery for sure, but not having morning woods does not mean that you're not recovered; you can still be recovered, maybe even fully so, without getting morning woods. There were months where I would not get morning woods but i'd still be able to have sex multiple times a day several times a week
     
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  19. Gavalar09

    Gavalar09 Fapstronaut

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    Fair enough. I won't worry about that so much then if it's happened to you too.
    Guess it's just the libido thing now
     
    Freeddom_Taker and modernstore99 like this.
  20. Your sex drive probably work best where there is intimacy. No significant other= No libido
    Some dudes are this way and some are not.
     

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