Giving this a try

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Healed!, Nov 14, 2017.

  1. Healed!

    Healed! Fapstronaut

    I'm desperate. PMO has been consuming my life. I have a lot of alone time that sets me up for failure. I'm married and my wife became aware of my problem two years ago. It's created a barrier between us and it kills me to see the hurt I've caused her. I'm dealing with ED that has gotten consistently worse. I'm so overwhelmed with guilt and shame and exhausted by the energy it takes to conceal my actions. I want to be done with this once and for all. I can't risk revealing this to anyone in person so the anonymity of this site is very helpful. Your stories of success encourage me.
    vxlccm likes this.
  2. my recovery

    my recovery Fapstronaut

    Welcome brother.

    Porn/masturbation is certainly a taboo and embarrassing but I've told many people in the last month and as bad as my situation is, they've all been supportive. If sharing your problems here is helping, then start a journal and pour your heart out!

    Many problems we experience are reversible, try to put the past behind you and put your energy into recovery.

    I look forward to reading how you will tackle this addiction, the support and advice here is second to none.
  3. Hello and welcome to NoFap!

    I'm really sorry about your current situation right now. Let me know if I can help.
    vxlccm likes this.
  4. bike-wrench

    bike-wrench Fapstronaut

    Oh, crap. Does that sound like me, or what? I have a lot of alone time to fill, my wife is aware of my problem (my first time was five years ago; I'm not exactly a record-breaking success around here), and I came this time because of the hurt I caused my wife, and because PMO made me break the promise I made to my wife, to be (in the words of the old Quaker wedding ceremony) unto her a loving and faithful husband. I lied to myself that it wasn't infidelity becasue it wasn't with a real person. But it has all of the hallmarks and effects of infidelity, doesn't it?

    I had to make a lot of changes. It's only a little time, and the trust is not back by any means, but there are little signs that things are a bit better with my wife. I can't guarantee that for you... but I can guarantee this: if you go back to PMO, things WILL get worse.

    Check in again soon. Get some info. Think about what changes you can make in your life.
  5. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    Welcome to NoFap where you are amongst friends who are here to encourage you and sometimes challenge you but not judge you.

    It will take time but you can get through this.

    The enemy is here to steal, kill and destroy. What are your current strategies for combating the enemy called PMO?
  6. Healed!

    Healed! Fapstronaut

    So far I'm relying on willpower and prayer. The support I've received here already is extremely helpful.
  7. Healed!

    Healed! Fapstronaut

    Thanks for being there.
    vxlccm likes this.
  8. Healed!

    Healed! Fapstronaut

    I don't necessarily see it as infidelity, but on the other hand, it's not true faithfulness either if it makes me less able to please my wife and brings her pain. She has been very supportive lately and wants to see me conquer this. I don't think at first she understood the extremely addictive nature of PMO.
  9. Healed!

    Healed! Fapstronaut

    I'm trying to be more mindful about my situation and the realities instead of the lies I choose to believe. I am praying. I am making myself accountable here and to my wife. Thanks for the encouragement.
  10. Healed!

    Healed! Fapstronaut

    2525 likes this.
  11. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    Check out In Case You Didn't Know for strategies and tips which may help you along your journey.
    vxlccm likes this.

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