Glad I found this place...

Hi from Canada
I’m 45 years old and have been basically addicted to porn since I was 12 years old after finding my uncle’s huge stash of magazines and vhs tapes. I was instantly fascinated and obsessed and the rest is history.
I’ve since watched and looked at porn almost daily and cultivated the seeds of deep shame, secrecy and guilt for 33 years. Add to that the ‘complication’ of being bisexual since puberty (more shame and guilt from an early age) and poof....full blown sex addict. I’ve been with hundreds of random sex partners over the years (even extramaritally) and have used many dangerous and illicit drugs (like cocaine, crack, and meth) all in service of enhancing the sex high.

Well, I’ve finally decided enough is enough. I want to feel strong and confident and open in the world and realize that I need to eliminate this poisonous pattern of behavior in order to do so.

I’ve been PMO free since Dec. 1, 2019 (I’m on day 8 as I write this and so far I feel good. I already feel an increase in self confidence and I like that.
But I’m not deluding myself into thinking it’s gonna be easy. I’m probably still riding on the initial high of self confidence that comes with taking such a powerful stand for myself and my life. That’s why I’m glad this community exists because I’m sure I’m gonna need it.

Thanks for reading my intro and I’m looking forward to this new journey of self discovery ahead.

 

I masturbated today. I didn’t use porn. I was on day 12. I’m glad I avoided pornography and only used my imagination (non porn images) but I still feel as though I’ve reset my progress. Starting again, today Dec. 12, 2019.