Hi, Beware triggers present in this post I've been abstinent for quite some time now, my SO has been suffering mentally and now diagnosed as bi polar2 which is more down than up. Her appetite for sex has disappeared and mine is rampant. A few days ago after temptations I suggested to my SO about 1 masturbation to get rid of uncomfort and increased libido knowing she doesn't want it. This went amazingly badly and put the relationship back as she saw me going back to the old person I was. As it happened last night we talked and cuddled and she saw to my needs with her hand and she was happy but still unsure where we stand. I really want to get to a normal sex life with my SO and be free from the monster in my head. I would appreciate advice from SO's as I don't fully understand women's heads. @Kenzi and @BetrayedMermaid if you could help I would be very grateful.