Gym, self-esteem: before and after Relapse

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Code Hero, Jan 28, 2018.

  1. Code Hero

    Code Hero Fapstronaut

    I just relapsed after 23 wonderful, odd, flatlining, PMO-free days. I don't plan on relapsing again, and I want to talk about how the gym has helped me get through this particularly difficult day.

    Clearly I have some work to do. But during those 23 days, I hit the gym. HARD. I ran on alternating days for anywhere between 20 minutes and 45 minutes. I lifted a little. I used a stairmaster. I did pushups and situps. I put in a full hour of sweat every time, to the point that my shirt was always soaked through. I made it a goal to burn between 700 and 1000 calories every workout. I'm a stocky man, and for me a healthy weight is 215 lbs. I started 24 days ago at 227.

    After relapsing, I didn't know how I could look in the mirror. I was really ashamed today. I had been so proud of my progress, and I failed myself and my brothers and sisters in this community. I went to the gym and ran as long and as far as I could, for an hour, burning 1115 calories. I could not outrun this relapse and the pain in my heart, nor the fog in my brain.

    Then I went home. And I did look in the mirror. I noticed that my jawline is more visible. I pinched my stomach, and far less fat folded between my fingers. I stepped on a scale after dinner: 214 lbs.

    Yes, I relapsed. But during those 23 days I improved. My brain may not be rewired, but my body is something I feel more proud of. I will keep this going. I will surpass 23 days in this next month, and my brain and body will eventually sync up. The nofap lifestyle includes all of these positive changes, so even in the darkest hours, not all is lost.
     
  2. Maticordovita

    Maticordovita Fapstronaut

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    it's good that you have that mentality, now go for more do not get discouraged, exercise and other activities will help you. before entering Nofap I had achieved 30 days without PMO, I felt very sad about the relapse, I found this community and I feel that now I can manage to leave PMO now I go 7 days without PMO but I feel that I am on the right track and my mind knows it Come on, we can.
     
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  3. Bemybest

    Bemybest Fapstronaut

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    That was great motivating stuff!
    Thanks
     
    Code Hero likes this.
  4. TetraVaal

    TetraVaal Fapstronaut

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    Keep the good work, brotha! One thing I would say is: don't feel ashamed that you relapsed. Shame is poison for the mind, just like fear.

    So take that shame and turn it into ANGER, but not against yourself. Don't feel anger against yourself. Don't beat yourself down. Instead, learn from your error and channel that anger against the temptation to fap. Next time you feel the urge, use your past mistake to feel anger to propel you forward and fuel your motivation to better yourself, to workout, to achieve things, etc.
     
    Code Hero likes this.
  5. dragonslayer

    dragonslayer Fapstronaut

    Brother, once you have tasted the feeling of Freedom from PMO, there is no turning back. Whatever the reason was that caused the unfortunate relapse, I am sure after relapsing you are now more than sure, that it was not worth it. I would advice to get rid of the trigger that caused the relapse though, so that you secure yourself even more.

    My experience has been that after refraining from porn for 20+ days, I am more in control. Then relapsing requires some serious urge and then also its very much controllable. And also, the times that I relapsed in the past, I did not even like it at all. It was like I was forcing myself to relapse due to the situation, mostly due to anger, frustration or self-hatred.

    Keep up the gym routine!! Peace.
     
    Code Hero likes this.
  6. Keep up the work. Exercise is the most underutilized tool for all-around wellness.
     
    Code Hero likes this.
  7. That is awesome and inspiring! Keep up the good work.

    Usually fapping kills any motivation to go to the gym. But, to me, it sounds like you said, "Fuck this. I'm not giving up". With that kind of determination you're gonna crush this.
     
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