Unimportant Main Character
New Fapstronaut
I've felt so lost and hollow. I'm 22 years old now and have been in contact with pornography since I was 10 or 11. Initially, I wasn't bad...as I have gotten older, the frequency is becoming worse. Every year, for the past three years I've told myself I would stop for good. There have been times when I would stop for a week....but now, it's everyday. Sometimes multiple times a day. My parents and closest friends and family have no idea I'm addicted. My parents and some friends know I have struggled in the past, but when they ask me about it I say I'm fine. I used to be so much happier. I'm part of a Christian Congregation that looks to me as an example to look up to. But my life feels so hypocritical....the guilt I feel has drawn me away from people and relationship I have. I've lied to my Elders and the people in the congregation. They see me as a respectable young man but, I feel so far from it. I hide my feelings from everyone. I feel so fake. I have never explained the extent of my situation to this degree to anyone before...I really hope being here can help.